please please tell us that the parcels consisted of 1X bombers and 1X cat urine filled shoes?!?!

it’d be fantastic thinking that the normal response would be hindered by the non-delivery of the normal response.

please?

People used to not wear seatbelts and also leave kids unprotected without alcohol.

8O

always, always make sure kids wear condoms around alcohol!

marvelous

just feels good to say, but i must be the only person who says it as for some reason people always look at me and smile repeating it “maaarrrvelous” as if i’ve invented the word.

i’m not on a diet (as in something you stop once you’ve lost the weight) i’ve “changed my diet” for the better.

its a mixture of several diets/an effort to stop eating crap/an effort to shrink my stomach so it doesnt take a buffalo to feel remotely full.

basically:

1)big push to eat food/meals that contain less than 4%fat.

2)only chicken and white fish (no red meats unless ALL the visible fat is cut off… and this is limited to once a week maximum.

3)no white carbs if i can help it (probably less than one medium sized white potato a week) replacing all bread and rice with wholegrain/wholemeal etc.

4)minimum 1.5ltrs of water a day + 1 portion of fruit juice a day minimum.

5)having a treat about once every couple of weeks (take away type thing… but making a more concious choice over it – curry must be tomato based, pizza gets replaced with one bought from the supermarket to ensure smaller portion/lower fat content etc

6)making sure i have breakfast each morning (1 portion of porridge or boiled egg on granary toast)

that’s it really, few simple changes and it doesn’t feel like i’m on a diet, just made a change :)

creep up silently behind them (having a deadly silent freewheel helps this) and slow right down…. eventually when they feel your unearthly presence behind them they’re usually too embarrassed at not noticing you (and you not being, in their eyes, rude enough to ask them to move)and they then jump out the way apologising :)

always say thanks and throw them a grin :D

damn you real man!

oh son, how we differ!

Ripped body – nope
Daft hairstyle – not any more
Rediculously small weiner – nope

all i need to do is an allbodyplasticsurgeryday and someone might be able to immortalise me in a masterpiece.

I’d love to have the confidence and body to do it…. but until that point I’m going to say that I wouldn’t be able to ‘cos of my bad back.

i’d (probably wrongly due to my lack of mechanical knowledge) assume that its cos you’re wife has ragged it to the limit in each gear before changing up, and cleared a load of soot etc from your pipes, so now when your driving its not pumping out black hell on the odd occasion you put your foot down :)

i have to remind myself to drive in higher revs once a month to do this, as i’m such a chilled driver that i never go above 2000revs unless im on a motorway in 5th gear (all the way up to 3000revs! 8O lol)

roaring like a dinosaur works

Refusing to ask her to marry me, she’s even bought herself a ring and everything to make it easier for me…even said I should just throw it at her one day, not even ask… but it has to be me giving it to her.

I’m just not doing it to annoy her now :D

same with not letting her have a kitten, I’m allergic to cats… but after a couple of months it dies down (I take an antihistamine most days anyway so its no real bother).

one day she’ll find a kitten with a ring hung around its little collar though… but only when she’s completely given up :twisted:

Kunstler – by reading your post (Well done for posting it by the way, I admire you’re guts already) it really does seem as if you’re a very self-aware guy and you seem to be good at reflecting and making plans…

These are HUGE skills to have in your mental toolbox! it sounds like you know what you’ve got to do, its just making that big step to doing them. As others have said, small steps and don’t rush yourself, everything you so is an achievement :)

If you’re in contact with a community team up in Edinburgh, try calling and explaining your situation with housing etc.. hopefully they’ll be able to point you in the direction of someone who can help. Make a point of telling them you cant stay where you are at the moment and be honest about how crap you feel. it’s really not a time to “man-up” or pretend to others you’re in a good place to do so.

hope you’re feeling better dude, remember, every little thing you do is an achievement when you’re feeling this bad! even having the guts to be honest to strangers :)

pook +1
rocketdog +1

Elfinsafety – Member – Whoever wins, I’ll be happy I’ve seen a fantastic F1 season. And I’ll be looking forward to next year.

agreed, but you’re still annoying ;)

you get the idea

do you not watch you’ve been framed?! 8O

its a question ive always wanted to ask TJ, and didnt see the point of starting a whole new thread.

i understand the research will be different etc, but opinion on this seems so strong i wondered if TJ and the other anti-helmets would extend this policy to other things in life that might involve taking a knock on the noggin? (not just sports)

what about working in a building site… should they stop wearing hats?

hope he’s alright :?

i hope alonso drives into vettel and both cars are out of the race (drivers walking away unharmed of course… well maybe if alonso could have something happen to his face so he’s forced to smile a bit more the OH wouldnt complain)

then i’d like webber and hamilton to race side by side the whole race, constantly overtaking each other.

then i’d like button to sneak past hamilton and webber as they’re playing silly buggers to win.

i’d like it to rain, but proper mental rain that comes out of nowhere… just after everyone changes their tyres.

that would make it an entertaining race.

the light idea isn’t that great TBH…

*runs into the corner and carves “pain” into my arm with a allen key*

you sir, have ruined my day!

threaten it with bombers

or pump it til it pops (into place hopefully)

sea sickness tablets should help that Hels….

ohhhh my light idea has gone down well

copyright ME 2010 haha.

it would only need to be a strong LED or something that doesnt draw much power.. main thing would be the ability to bed and twist it around into the tricky bits :)

i chose predominantly white kit when i can…. love how it gets muddy and the stains dont come out :D nobody can argue i dont go out and have fun on my bike!

bottle opener

cup/can holder

one of those lights on a flexible wire stand to move and point a what you’re doing

KY is better than vaseline for making strangers blush, now that supermarkets sell all the durex “play” range the world is your oyster :)

the one i’ve always wanted to do is fill up the trolly, get to the check-out and load it all up carefully…

then as they finish running it all through, ask what the price is…

“that’ll be 134pounds sir”
“hmmm i thought so”

and walk off.

alternatively

“that’ll be 134pounds sir”
“ahh cool, i dont think i’ll go for them, just wanted to check as nothing seems to have prices on the boxes in this shop!”

and walk off.

@TINAP: devils highway is long, straight and hilly… can see why you’d get bored quickly! i still prefer it over any other route as i’m constantly being reminded about wearing down my tyres on the road lol

@CG: know what you mean about the GP-induced gym goers… used to be a lot at the gym in yately run by haart council, although i used to go in the mornigns after night shifts and it was mainly the older crew, very polite and i was never made to feel out of place like some gyms (having dreads instantly singled me out from all the hardcore chavs and i used to get stared out constantly)

i think i might pop down there after work and check it out :)

IIRC you cant get arrested or accused of shoplifting until you try and leave the premises….

load up your pockets and stuff your xmas jumpers with your shopping and wander around suspiciously, putting whatever your holding back on the shelf instantly the moment a security guard looks at you, but make sure you’ve still got a massive bottle of something sticking out your pocket.

they cant touch you until you leave, the disappointment in their eyes when you wander over the a check out and load it all carefully onto the checkout to be paid for!

alternatively if you’re a wimp and dont have the guts to try the above… when it comes to entering your pin, pull out a massive bit of paper with 4 random numbers written on it, and read them loudly whilst typing in your actual pin, then announce “i dont know why i carry this bit of paper, i’ve written it on the back of the card anyway!” (always shocks the people in the queue :D

put embarrassing items (itchy vagina cream, multipacks of condoms, tena-lady incontinence pads etc) in other peoples trollies or baskets when you see them approaching the tills and its too late to notice.

pick miserable looking shoppers and follow them around until they’ve finished their shopping, making sure to do the ever-so-british-and-polite “we must stop meeting like this” line everytime.

i like to pick the grumpiest looking checkout-monkey and force them into innane conversation about how wonderful it must be to work for a company like tescos, make sure this convo gets in the way of packing or paying with any speed.

a mixture of all of the above ensures a pleasant supermarket experience for all invovled :D

dont worry TSY, just dont post up on here if you’ve got the sniffles… providing they dont know, they cant send you to be put down.

(no i’m not saying the kittens just got the sniffles)

thats nothing, i’ve got a gnarly papercut that keep opening everytime i wash my hands! :roll:

AKA:

f**king hell dude, thats intense… i’m glad you’re doing better and out of hospital! its too easy to rush back into things and end up worse off for it… did the docs give you any advice about exercise?

its worth nothing, i suggest you donate it to me as a fellow bad back sufferer.

(sorry to hear about your back Rachel, hope it does improve and you find yourself riding sick to the power of gnar asap)

hmmm saw nirvana come up in the search listings…. but the council run edgebarrow one looks like it’ll be the best for money, and from what i can tell the memberhsip means i’d have access to the gym at sandhurst school (which is less then 10 minutes walk away… but only open in the evenings and weekends)

know what you mean about riding to the gym as a possible non-starter… i’d have to ride past the turning for devils highway which leads directly into swinley. i hope to remedy this by using only an old halfrauds BSO to get to the gym as there’s no way i’d trust the handlebars not to fall off when going over anything other than a curb.

cheers for the reply though dude! where abouts are you based?

i’ve never had a job looking after animals so i feel i am as qualified as everyone else to give you my opinion on the matter.

i believe it was TJ who said something along the line of:

if gaffa tape doesnt fix it, beer will.

or maybe try wd40?

either way i think you need to invest in some body armour and a helmet for your kitten

(hope it works out dude, vets may be expensive but i’d trust them over any internet advice! fingers crossed for your kitten)

*runs off to buy a life-jacket!*

but will it fit over my body armour?

So why are helmet evangelists so offensive?

so why are you so offended? :wink:

’tis why i dont go to london…

cougar +1

as much as i agree with the OP, people who dont work and leave it to tohers to fill the gaps are beyong frustrating… but if i only get paid to work until 5pm, thats when i leave work.

(i always leave my mobile on anyway as if something kicks off at work i’d like to be kept updated, and of course if there’s an emergency with a patient then i’d rush straight back in)

having a life outside of work is important, if companies expect their staff to work from home in the evenings and on weekends etc then it should be included in the contract… i know of one very big gaming company that specifies this in the contracts and even stops all staff from taking annual leave anywhere near the christmas period.

looking forward to feb too :D

found a new bit in swinley yesterday that we all loved, felt fantastic!

shame you didnt bump into us at swinley yesterday, we would’ve said hi, would’ve prob asked to follow you around for a bit too and been a bit too friendly… you know…. bit of groping, touching of “special areas” ;)

if it helps, everyone we bumped into there yesterday was really cool and said hi back or chatted for a bit.