wow that takes nearly as long to read as it did to write! :oops:

hey tim!!

the plans for the ride have been developed

all info is now on:
THIS THREAD

really would be great to meet you :)

OK

all info is now on:
THIS THREAD

sounds good mboy :) more than welcome!

clip-art….. people love clip art :lol:

ask everyone in the audience to stand up one-by-one and tell everyone a their name and a little bit about themselves, makes everyone equal

take a hammer to whack the desk with loudly if you notice anyone loosing interest

if you’re using a little microphone… make sure you practice beatboxing into it before starting, and wear it to the bathroom afterwards whilst you mutter stuff about that fat one at the front who you knew everyone could smell from the back of the room… audiences love that.

HTH x

whats this about boxing day PP?

gotta go see my nieces, then its mrsconsequences mum’s first christmas in her new house so gotta go there… quite a few plans annoyingly but i’m keeping boxing day to myself so ive got some time to see friends if they’re free.

yeah i didnt think i’d need to tell people to be considerate, long winded way of saying that people will do what they want, but in the spirit of a super-welcoming-ride if people do want to smoke/drink/turn up naked then i’d respectfully ask that people are considerate of those that might be put out by it, and for non-smokers to not make the poor nicotine starved feel guilty :)

+1 on everyones comments so far…. i feel dirty but i’m looking forward to how this thread turns out

mrsconsequence loves xmas, i take great delight in being the biggest scrooge i can up until christmas morning when she opens all her presents.

at least she makes an effort to spread her christmassy joy, she’s bought a couple of issues of nuts/zoo etc to cut out all the boobs and make a giant boob based xmas card for my friend :)

happy birthday tazzy for yesterday! apologies for missing it, i’ll send you surfmatt in the post to make up for it.

i think in regards to drinking it’ll be something along the lines of: some people like to have a sneaky snifter of alcohol, or even fill their drinks bottle with beer, if so and they end up drunk to the point of being “not awesome” then the group reserves the right to play “bush-push” with then… (if you’re going to drink, just dont take it to far)

in regards to smoking:
some people smoke normal cigarettes, if so please make an effort to smoke away from the larger group and dont grab the nearest child of innocent animal to blow your smoke in the face of… equally non-smokers must make an effort to not pull condescending faces and make smokers feel awkward.

in regards to smoking funny smelling cigarettes/torminalis’ bong:
away from the group…. if you get caught by rangers and told off… well thats nothing to do with the non-smokers. but its your choice and i’m not going to start telling people what they can and cant do.

anybody taking speed will be too far ahead from the group to care about :lol:

timothius was on a different thread… this one kinda developed into talking about the ride un-intentionly

his was titled something about “OT:getting a life” if i remember correctly

yeah making our way over to labyrinth early in the ride is a good idea, as for group sizes it’d be nice if the numbers were low enough to mess about in one big group, but if it looks like its going to be big when the official phils sexy party ride thread is underway then the need to maybe put a bit of thought into groups will make itself clear :)

so far essentials that need to be mentioned:

. date
. meeting and start time. car parking and warning to get there early to find a space
. whos coming
. if anyone wants to lead the ride
. reminding people to bring their own snacks, drinks, sexlube, bike lube, velour outer-layers, gloves, spares, nightvision, car-keys for the bowl, mobiles etc
. money for bike pass for the afternoon, or booking online in advance
. plans for beers afterwards
. during ride alcohol and smoking rules
. riding at the pace of the slowest rider, faster people agree to wait at the top of the next hill or at the next junction, or accept they’re prob going to get separated from the group

…. and any other suggestions that come along.

i’m looking forward to this :D remember kids, off-road all-terrain biking is a dangerous sport and you might get hurt… dont blame me… blame Yeti.

i’m going to watch con air tomorrow morning now :D

that is all x

oh and it was a references to old man mitch’s age :lol:

i fully expect that when he can make it down for a group mess around he’ll come down armoured up with mobility aids and a warm thermos full of lactulose

(big drops, jumps, small drops, things that are too steep, small children etc.)

these things you list…. they sound horrific! :) it’ll be fine, think a few of us are at the same level!

everyones welcome :) i do not discriminate and anyone who does will be shunned with all the shun i can muster!

i was being serious about turning up in full on DH pyjamas and riding a carrera… will even wear a big rucksack :D that way everyone else can relax knowing nobody will look as silly as me and have broken so many unwritten rules of MTB!

allowing time for parking is a good point, any other hints and tips, or requests etc get them into this thread now so i can make notes before starting a dedicated ride thread on the weekend :)

and yes if all gos well, it will definitely be repeated!

so decided yet yeti? (was being serious about the offer of enjoying the comfort of a sofa the night before at mine to make getting up on a sunday morning less horrific)

could the tiger talk? or were you trying to entice it with fishy paste spread over your genitals?

good job you did that train 4 trade skills course!

(if you haven’t seen the advert, my comment wont make sense)

if i were to ask a bike question then i’d hope the info given would be reasonably accurate as i wouldnt want to give someone the wrong info and them end up wasting money buying a wrongly fitting part.

other than that its game on i say!

anyone said “true lies” yet?

toy story

rain man

ghostbusters

schindlers list

american beauty

se7en

the piano

jurassic f***ing park!!!

fightclub

12 monkeys (the fisher king too)

leon

sorry b’mitch, swinley isn’t a proper trail centre with graded runs… there’s no wheelchair/zimmer specific trails.

(tis a shame indeed…. i’m sure if all gos well and the police dont get involved we’ll organise another one in ze new year/early spring….)

right thats it yeti, im driving up to wallingford this afternoon, if i smell yeti fur within 10 miles i’m coming to find you and slap you

is it me or does the world look a little bit greyer today? as if someone has come along and sucked all the colour and fun out of it….

oh yes… that’d be you TSY!

*bursts into tears and runs into the corner to carve “WHY?!” into my arm with a paperclip*

there’s only one way to express my feelings on your indecision TSY… and thats in internet cat form:

you was even going to be invited over the night before to make it easier and save getting up in the morning on sunday to travel…. but alas its obvious you dont love us anymore.

arseology and boobosophy

scrape his face off with a hammer drill then beat him to death with your penis

then he’ll see who’s manly.

only attractive people should be allowed into uni’s.. it would make my drive home from work much more pleasing when stuck in traffic.

we all know deep down that the uggos end up working in low-end jobs like mechanics, call centres and bin men.

it would make the intelligent subjects (philosophy, science and such) much more attractive to the general public and therefore would end up with more government funding.

i rest my case.

no need to shout!

well am i getting the feeling that most people have xmas work dos on friday night… if so then i’m nominating sunday.. any problems you sexy sexy people?

i do love confronting fears… its a definite plan, just gotta wait til spring has sprung :) and i’ve got over paying for snowboarding holiday and a session with jedi in feb

still trying to learn to ride my bike iDave! plus only jsut started the gym, and its the season to burn some money on slope time snowboarding… will have the free time and money to do it in spring :)

not bailing out, just waiting until i can sensibly manage it and have some time to practice what i’ve learnt.

be proud of me dave, i’ve lost over a stone on a diet thats taken influence from yours :)

they sure are! i wouldnt trust one to save me if i was drowning…..

front crawl?! are you mad?! you might as well drown yourself in a puddle as it’ll be much less traumatic than trying to do something as advanced as the front crawl!

see….even without water you’re pretty much simuating your own death 8O

can i provide back-up/distracting comments in yeti’s ear via secret agent style walkie-talkies?

i know what your thinking… well what a waste of money, by the time they get down to hardcore-super-sex there’ll be nothing for Phil to do.. well you’re wrong! i can hand out snacks and energy drinks.

currently earning more than mrsconsequence, but if she took a job doing the same thing for any organisation other than a charity she’d be on about the same per year, and i think she’s got a great future climbing the ranks VERY quickly ahead so i hope for her sake she’s earning more than me soon :)

she’s technically got higher qualifications than me, but ive got street smarts you see ;) she’s normal University IQ level, i’m 2 points off mensa, plus… when she’s not at work she cant make a decision to save her life so she’ll always need me haha.

any tips on encouraging foxes to leave our intensly gravel based back garden alone and stop using it as a giant litter tray?

cheers for the supportive replies everyone… was ready to arrive back to find “man up” type comments!

what i’m thinking is i’ve just started a membership at a small gym that doesnt have a pool, so i hope to continue there until late spring, fingers crossed by then i’ll be feeling fitter and more confident anyway, then its time to join up to a bigger gym with a pool and sauna (good for the back) or if the gym is no longer needed and as i hopefully start riding even more i’ll look for a swimming lesson type deal somewhere.

good to know there’s other adults out there learning… whenever i’ve been to a pool in the past there’s lots of people doing lengths in the marked off lanes and im stuck with the kids not really doing much!

any thoughts on aquarobics? or am i jsut being silly now haha

8O

burn the witch!

PSA iDave is warning people of a scan within a scam, much like Inception. do not read what he has written because you’ll wake up on a train

who would taste better:

meat eater?
vegetarian?
vegan?
fatty?
athlete?
middle manager who eats what he wants and has the belly to prove it but not obese?

would kids taste better than old people?