Good on you for admitting your human and not bottling it up. Also a thank you to the helpful advice offered by all riders here.
My partner lost her dad after a slow decline who she was very close to.
I lost my dad who wasn’t much cop and consequently i didn’t even go his funeral.
What i,m trying to say is that you should cherish your memories and be glad that you all get on.
I would say your Gp is the best bet and a bit of counselling, you don’t sound like you need loads.