Racing is not for everyone.
I have raced twice and i find it quite unnerving.
To place you have to go flat out and risk injury, i’m not stupid or skilled enough to do that.
I do enjoy the odd race but literally one or two a year is enough.
Enduro races in the UK are generally on seldom used tracks so they don’t weather 100-200 riders well.
Try the odd Mini DH race from time to time and get in to it with less pressure maybe?