GT Grade V1 is 135QR rear and 15×100 front if you can find one. I’ve had one for a while, limited tyre clearance compared to more modern gravel frames but still a nice bike.

Like many others I’ve been through similar, in my case during the first covid lockdown.
Legal advice is there if you need it (luckily I didn’t), as others have said no matter how bad it gets keep it as amicable as possible, maintain dignity and stay rational. It will all be in your favour in the long run.

You will never be replaced as your daughter’s Dad. My ex recently moved in with her new partner and with my daughter. I was terrified my daughter would have no need for our relationship and questioned what I could offer her. After the novelty wore off we’re probably getting on better than ever, in fact shes always hassling her mum to come and see me.

As hard as its going to feel now keep doing the stuff you enjoy when you can bikes/outdoor/hobbies, see friends family and keep talking. You need to look after yourself and give yourself time to adjust too. All the stuff people told me sounded like cliche but all turned out to be right.

Thanks Martin, really useful and I enjoyed reading your report. I’m reasonably familiar with the lakes but not the Yorkshire sections. Will be editing the route to include your suggestions. May well end up on hardtails to make the most out of the offroad parts.

Thanks both, hopefully this is the link to the route working now. Need to check the map in detail but seems to miss Garburn but still includes Walna Scar. Looks like more road in the middle section compared to the MTB C2C so hopefully miss the worst of the mud/boggy bits.

Gravel Bike Coast to Coast Route – pedalnorth

Thanks all. Ebay purchase so I can’t warranty as I’m not the original owner. Seller listed fork as having been removed from new bike (and it does look brand new tbf) and of course claims they didn’t know about the problem. Pretty sure its oil leaking, whole bladder was covered when I removed it and would explain the noises and lack of compression as air has got in.

Looks like its chase a refund through ebay or keep and sort myself. Have emailed SlicknSlide for a quote to repair. May be worth it as the fork was a decent price and no other issues.

I’m spannering for this charity in the North East https://watbike.co.uk/
We do used bike refurbs and sales, regular servicing, maintainance classes, ebike hire, guided rides and more. Also have a barn full of old/obscure parts and there’s a cafe on site.

I used this kit on mine https://www.oneupcomponents.com/products/kit-dropper-rebuild-v1

If it’s just sticking in it’s travel and not gritty/dry as well you will probably get away with just changing the top split bushing like I did!

You can squirt grease (must be thin NLGI 2 or less) down the keyways and cycle it in (ghetto service).

Brilliant ordered thanks! Yep reckon the top bushing is the culprit, having to regrease reguarly just to keep it moving.

njcisca,

Not good at link posting but this is the one that I bought. Unfortunately it is currently OOS but it might come back in.

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Brand-X-Ascend-Dropper-Cartridge-Service-Kit-Parts-Bushes-Seals-Upgrades/284098250955?ssPageName=STRK%3AMEBIDX%3AIT&var=585590344926&_trksid=p2057872.m2749.l26

Dogsby

Thanks Dogsby, did this one come with 3 keys or the 4 small ones? pic on ebay for the OOS kit looks like 4 keys which I don’t think would fit mine.

If you bought from CRC or Wiggle and it’s less than two years old try and get it fixed or replaced under warranty.
I had an Ascend XL that developed excessive play due to worn keys and I got a full refund in vouchers as they didn’t have stock at the time to replace it, I didn’t even have to send my wobbly post back.

I bought the post used so no warranty unfortunately.

I’ve got Bitex 106R/106F on my gravel bike, not needed to touch them in two years despite being used all year and all conditions. Bearings still perfect, freehub smooth and quiet. Light and loads of choice for axles/discs/freehubs too. Previously had some of the better novatecs but these are a definite step up.

Cheers, probably couldn’t stretch to the S10e but s7 looks decent.
I had one samsung phone a while back (A5 I think) that had an irritating amount of non removeable bloatware so slightly wary since then. Are the new ones better for that?

Great thanks will have a look at rx sport. For those using transition lenses do you find they change quick enough? For example going from sunlight into dark woods?

I’ve recently done similar and bought a Baron/Kaiser combo from bike discount. Both 29×2.4 bc compound.
Coming from a Magic Mary/HD so far the grip and feel is excellent. Baron on the front better than the Mary in loose crud and a noticeable improvement on wet roots and rocks. I was a big fan of the MM but im more confident with the baron.
On the back I reckon the Kaiser is slightly slower than the hans but not much. Drives and brakes really well, slight tendency to break loose in the slop but I dont mind this in a rear tyre.
As for downsides I’ve had slightly inconsistent sealing too, after a couple of rides the sidewalls were leaking so had to top up sealant. Also managed to put a small tear in the Kaiser sidewall just above the bead. To be fair Id been on a very rocky trail and hit it hard enough to ding the rim too. Wouldn’t seal so patched from the inside and seems fine now.
Overall would definitely recommend. In dry conditions might look for a trail king as a faster rear and try the Kaiser on the front.

@joebristol I’m similar in terms of longer legs so medium sounds like the best bet. Even that is considerably longer in reach and top tube length than my current bike.

@julioflo I’ve not ruled out the AM9 option with a lighter build. Tough one as I’d really like to demo both but might not be possible for a while now. At the same time the itch for a new bike build/lockdown project is growing!

@wayniac thanks for the feedback all really useful. Sounds like exactly what I’m looking for in terms of do it all ability. Out of interest do you remember if the demo bike have particularly draggy/heavy tyres on? Wondered if that affected the feeling of slow acceleration.

@wildfires3 interesting on the sizing. I’m 172cm and had assumed I’d be on an ML but seems Med would probably fit better with how long these frames are.

Hope your 9c’s are ready soon! Keep us posted on your thoughts when they arrive and plenty of photos.

@wayniac didn’t realise 150 fork was an option which did you go for?
I’ve been very tempted to pull the trigger on a frameset myself but going to hold out for a demo first. Will no doubt feel very different to my current bike so an extended test definitely worthwhile.

@ceept Thanks, that sounds like a good plan I’d be looking at ML frames too.
I’ll message you nearer the time, if you hear anymore updates before then keep me posted.

Hi, thats good timing I’ve just signed up to Octopus myself.
I’ve sent a message with the code if you’d still like one.

I could have written that exact post, right down to the upcoming 40th birthday treat.

I had a car park ride on a large AM9 last week & liked it. It didn’t feel as long as I expected it to, but maybe less playful & too big a bike for long day riding, the puffer, etc.

Their is allegedly an aluminium Aether 9 coming soon, which would suit probably 75% of my riding better, but their will be days @ Dunkeld etc where I would probably wish I had the AM9. Kinda thinking I need to try both. Funnily enough, I emailed Ben earlier to enquire about demos.

Perfect excuse for a new bike! I’d heard about an incoming alloy Aether 9 too could be worth the potential saving and I’m not in a hurry to buy.

Current bike is an older model Spectral CF – I like the playful handling and relative light weight but feels out of its depth on very steep and rough stuff. Of course my lack of skill and bottle will play a big part in this too. Its finding a balance between all day pedalling and climbing ability and feeling confident on the way down. All a compromise as usual!
Demo of both definitely the way to go.

All very useful cheers, I’m near the Consett branch so would be very tempted to demo when they make it up here. I kind of like the looks, reckon it would look better in the metal/plastic too

@joebristol that was my hypothetical thinking between the AM9 Aeris and Aether. I’m not going to be ploughing through rock gardens or hitting big jumps and drops so a shorter travel bike seemed to make more sense on paper. And weight does matter for long climbs and hike a bike. Not completely set on 29er, current bike is 27.5 but like the idea of better roll over and grip.

This is brilliant, I hope all the family can enjoy together. Mmmm so many frazzles!
It’s made my day too 👍

Cheers all. Another rough night turning things over in my head and little sleep. Really missing family life (and tbh my now ex).
There are some positives down the line though. Will be great if this
work comes off just being occupied will really help.
Bike business is apparently booming, I used to work in a shop so could be good timing getting back into it.

I’d only taken a couple of tablets so doc says it’s OK to leave them for now if I’m insure. In reality it was too soon to experience any side affects so it was either in my head or just being under the weather.
I’m going to get through this week and if the underlying low feeling and anxiety are just the same I’ll start again and commit to the full course.
Avdave as you say gp said there are other options for meds but need a good few weeks see how I react.

Hi, just a little update and maybe some advise.
Still feeling all over the place as to be expected, very low mood at times and all the same thoughts about my family and situation. Had one councilling appointment over the phone, not sure what to think yet – so far maybe felt a bit generic? conversation didn’t go beyond what I’ve discussed with friends/family/here but its early days so I’ll give it a few more sessions.
On the other side I’ve been on a couple of longer bike rides this week that I’m starting to enjoy again. All being well I should also be seeing my daughter for a day later this week. Also on the positive side i’m hopefully going to be starting some part time bike spannering in a workshop. My usual work is still months off but will be good to have a focus.

I’ve just started on the anti-depressants (sertraline) but I’m unsure whether to continue. The reason I’m questioning it is I’ve already noticed some side affects – mainly even worse sleep, feeling sick and a bit out of it. Really don’t want to mess up the chance of work by feeling too unwell or not being ‘with it’ enough to concentrate. I’ll call the gp tomorrow and see what they say. Those who have taken these kind of meds how did you cope with the first few weeks? did you manage to get on and work as usual?

Hope everyone else whose been up against it is hanging in there, thanks again for the support.

Mark Lanegan. Friend and occasional collaborator with Kurt Cobain.
Great if you like the dark blues/folk thing.

Nice words avdave2. If theres one thing I’ll take from this time its to never forget the people who are helping my through then make sure I repay them in anyway possible when the time comes.

Mixed few days for me. Yesterday maybe the worst of all – had no sleep at all and completely broke down with the pain of missing my family, home, everything. Very dark day.
Felt a bit stronger today, spoke to my daughter on the phone and started to plan to see her in the week. Still incredibly hard but its something to work towards. Longer bike ride helped too, mind racing but a few moments of remembering I can enjoy turning pedals and tyres on tarmac.

A daft little mantra I’ve been repeating… You are still in there. Under all the pain, stress and doubt. Still there.

Very sorry to hear this. I can only hope you are able to connect and share some good memories today.
As others have said to me do keep talking, the forum has exceeded my expectations there are some good folks on here.

Honestly im blown away and moved by the support. When everyone is dealing with stress and uncertainty in their own lives too.
Impossible for now true. I think when the relationship first ended I was almost in denial, its only the last few weeks that size and implications everything have hit me.
Everything that was constant or a source of stability has gone, or at least changed.

Will be writing things down for sure ready for the counselling. @iancity1 good point too, if its not working with the first counsellor I’ll be prepared to try someone else.

You are right avdave2 I’ve seen friends and family come through rough situations and that is what I would always tell them. Just much harder to see while caught in the middle looking outwards.

What a great song thanks Saxonrider. Love folk/roots music – been known to occasionally strum a guitar or even banjo for my sins!

Notebook could be a good call. Even getting things down in writing has been useful on here.
Most of my thoughts now aren’t so much decisions to make but issues that for now have no real resolution. That clarity could come in time, the limbo of lockdown is just preventing any practical moves.

Got a telephone appointment booked with a councillor next week. Another first for me – hoping professional perspective will be helpful.

Some more great advice thanks again for everyone taking time to read and post.
Got slightly more sleep last night but still woke up feeling crushed by everything.

Its going to be a long road out and you are all right its the small steps I need to focus on. I think I’m very much still mourning the relationship and security I had at home. Its like complete withdrawal syndrome. Every part of me wants to just go back be normal and be with my daughter and now ex even though I know its all changed. Knowing shes met someone is just the final nail, horrible feelings of worthlessness and jealousy that Im struggling to fight off.

Things weren’t perfect but for it all to be taken away in a short time Im deep in the shoulda/coulda/woulda as yoshimi said above.

@mehr very sorry to hear about your Dad. Your routine and approach to each day makes a lot of sense.

Its not easy asking for help when everything feels overwhelming but glad I did – both medically and on here. First steps I guess.
Managing one short bike ride a day. Just turning the pedals in a daze with all the same thoughts swirling around but I know I need to keep active.

@funkmasterp thank you

Heck the response on here really is amazing.

My daughter is 5 having facetime or phone calls every few days. Very very hard keeping it together to speak to her.

@iancity1 really sorry you’re going through similar. What a time to happen.
I was nearly going to end up in the same situation as you and stay in the same house but finding out about her meeting someone made it impossible for me. Hope its amicable enough for you to get by for now and you can enjoy being with your daughter. Thanks for pm offer may take you up sometime soon.

I’m on Sertraline right now, it’s doing me good. I was on them a couple of years ago and they didn’t do a thing for me then, but there’s nothing addictive about them and although they say there are withdrawal effects, if you look them up, they’re pretty much what you have now, low mood, sleep problems, anxiety and ideation. In short, take the Sertraline. For at least a month, some find they have an effect within a couple of days, others need weeks and weeks and upping the dose. Some they won’t help much at all, but there’s no real test of which antidepressant works for any individual so it’s a bit suck it and see.

Your doc will have told you to call back if things change, remember that, you can call back to them and discuss things over and over, either because things have changed or your experience with the drugs.

You are the same person you were five years ago, with the same worth. The times have changed and fate has chucked a bit too much your way this spring to cope, and that’s sort of OK, take the help from your doctor and anyone else who offers and you’ll get through it. Try not to hide from the stuff you have to do, and use the lockdown as an excuse to not stress about the stuff outside your control. Music helps for me, there will be something that does for you too. Try stuff. Nobody has to be happy at the minute, ok and keeping going will do for now. Keep us posted, or just blow of steam on here.

Thanks, I think I am edging towards the medication. I can’t start them quite yet as I’m finishing a course of steroids for something unrelated first. Hoping they can just do enough to keep me afloat for now.
Music has usually been good for me too but I’m at that horrible stage of evrything leading to a memory or negative thought.

Thank you all, really means a lot.
Its definitely the timing thats making the situation all the more nightmarish.
Would be a long round trip to see my daughter but maybe possible if im feeling a bit stronger.
Very much just surviving hour to hour im feeling that bad.

Kids under 18 can move from parent to parent.

If your concerned you could even just go n have a coffee in the garden n see her and play.

Have you spoken to your ex about shared custody?

My mum is 70 so so it was the risk of bringing infection here I thought prevented me contacting my daughter. Could be wrong though.
No detailed discussion but we do both want to share custody. We’re not really speaking much right now as things are very raw.

Thanks both for taking the time to reply.

I’m in a house with my mother, as I understand the lockdown rules if I saw my daughter I then wouldn’t be able to come back here.

Encouraging on the sertraline, I think I’m definitely at the point of giving it a go now.
The only comfort is that people do come out of these situations as you did futureboy. It helps trying to remember that.

Thanks again very useful.

From what they said on the phone they deduct a fixed percentage depending on the category, cat N is a 30% deduction so if I accepted the 2k valuation and keep the car I get £1400. In effect I’m paying £600 for my broken but repairable car. Now I’m not sure if they are trying it on and this percentage is open for negotiotion. I would be inclined to debate this with them as it does seem like a high deduction.

Looking on autotrader etc I may struggle to negotiate a higher settlement valuation, there are a fair few similar age Octavias around that price they would use that to back up their offer. They may be about to blow up (tsi engine apparently notoriously unreliable) but its not something I can really prove.

Interesting I had no idea I may be able to cancel the claim. No courtesy car or work undertaken only cost may be to garage for storage.
Cancelling the claim would I still have to pay to have cheap cat fitted approx £350 not great on an old car but would maintain no claims. Not confident enough to work on it myself unfortunately I have a habit of making things worse…

Good advise thanks, I’ve not accepted the insurance valuation yet. They did say if I retained it there is a fixed percentage they would deduct depending on category of the write off.

As tempting as that is I’m not sure the 12 yr old clutch would enjoy the extra shove!
Searching ebay and I can get a new cat for £250 not much more that a used one. Got to be good for a couple of years at least?

It was a one off I left it ouside the pub overnight after a few pints its usually parked at home. Bloody expensive night out!