I recommend using a vintage razor for shaving your legs!

real men use an epilady

Which year was it with the Land Rover climb that was about 1ft deep mud soup?

rkk01 is right, that was 2004. It was nice and sunny to finish. I got tan lines and everything.

I am always amazed at how much kit a lot of cycle commuters wear. I can be in shorts and base layer and they are still bimbling about in waterproof trousers and jacket.

The key word is bimbling. Getting up to a decent pace (and unlike sportives commutes are races, you versus every other commuter) generates a fair bit of internal heat. ‘s why you boil as soon as ou stop anywhere sheltered.

nothing between ass and chammois except cream

I’m a talc man myself.

“there is nothin round ere in Staines for us kids to do except…”

reels off long list.

neanwhile the lads next door I alluded to do not have a pot in which to piss but seem to find fun things to do to occupy their time without the need for youth services.

Yes indeed Andy… And then after all that pain my bloody tyre exploded…

shhh. some people are still unhappy you “borrowed” a track pump “left by the side of the track”. How clumsy of us soloists…

@littlemisspanda – you have seen Ali G haven’t you?

+1 OP

It has been going on since at least the mid 90s tho’. Someone dismantled a drystone wall on Longridge Fell back then to try and make a cheeky muddy trail (the one East of the trig point) more rideable and next thing there were No Cycling signs appearing at the entrance to footpaths.

The cheeky jumps in the woods were I live now have been abandoned as the youths have graduated to mini-motos through the crops cos its more extreme* innit.

* By “extreme” I mean, “easier to go fast by twisting a throttle instead of using legs and lungs”. They are nice lads but lazy and thick.

If you want a good time you need to do a reverse triathlete change from running shoes into cycling shoes or learn to run in your stiff soled shoes.

Dave of this parish did at least one good one a few years back. To a nice dub soundtrack IIRC. Or maybe Smashing Pumpkins. Anyway, whatever the backing I enjoyed the video.

It’ll be the 5th ride back after a couple of years off from riding.

At the risk of appearing rude you only seem to ride trail centres. Gishurn is very close to some “proper” riding in the Lakes or Dales.

I’d say that if its not at least over 50% off road then it should be down as a road one IMO

Sounds fair to me.

40% less body fat

6% here and out in short sleeves and naked knees today.

Yes, sorry, run/walk was longer last year. A few 3 mile runs just to get the legs used to it will do you.

When doing a long road ride on an MTB which should it rank under?

Bump. Doing an end to end this month on my singlespeed, but much of it will be on road.

Lenght of run changes. About half mile tops

When doing a long road ride on an MTB which should it rank under?

^^^^ ditto the effect on commute

100 pound plus bars

f*** me that carbon fibre is heavy shit

at least with ally bars you’ll save nigh on 99.5 lbs

My 14 year old Spot.

IIRC from the fitting instructions of Shimano mechs it used to be chain round big ring and large sprocket plus two links.

Not sure if this is still current.

@monkeychild My page stats say hardly.

Seriously though since posting the above link I have sobered up, got rid of duplicate ramblings on there, and added more to the above page. Feel free to ask me direct questions in the comments there.

Pissed and blowing my own trumpet…

http://www.32sixteen.com/mountain-mayhem-24-hour-solo-racing/

a fire distinguisher.

Distinguishes between petrol fires, electrical fires, gas fires…

Sounds like an ace piece of kit.

What’;s with all the double posts today?

It really isn’t a difficult course even at speed.

You’re right. For the likes of you. And me. But for lots of riders it is a technical course.

Your weight will be more over the front wheel. you will be more bent over on climbs. Git bar ends for climbing leverage and more comfortable wrists when climbing.

demonise NF mountain bikers.

did they have mountain bikes in the 70s?

NF means something very different to New Forest to some of us.

There was a TV show in the early 90s that built a cannon to compare the relative explosive power if gunpowder and petrol, firing a can of lager. As you do.

First, one teaspoon gunpowder. Can plops gently out the end with about as much force as a dry w**k.

Second, one teaspoon petrol. Clean over the next door field.

Cannae find it on YouTube. The lad who helped build the cannon used to live in Tod.

deleted double post

I’m always amazed that people will use enough fuel to move a ton and half of metal 40 miles to try and light a few bits of wood and then be surprised by the fact there’s ‘quite a big bang’.

^^^^^ this

Knew a thick lad in Widnes twenty years ago who tried to help a bonfire along and welded his nylon tracksuit to his front.

Sadly his bollocks remained in full working order and he was able to breed.

found my camelback rogue so I don’t have the world on my back.

As njee20 points out, try and do it without anything on your back. Use bottles for fluids and seat pack for tools. Your lower back will thank you at 4am. I’ve never lost a water bottle in all my years of Mayhem, but otgers obviously do. Get good metal cages. (King cage?)

……. until you lose the belly fat on top of your abs?

Not if you want to look like the cover of Mens Fitness

Yes, if you want core strength to help with your riding.

You can’t decide where to lose fat from, it’s an overall thing.

Stress hormones cause you to lay it down around your organs and core. Not sure if destressing helps lose it from there. But hey, it’s as good an excuse as any to Chill The F*** Out

possibly an impression. grammar pedants please wade in to clarify

They’d take an imprint of your teeth.

If its “non technical” why are there so many mincers in the singletrack in the woods, on the steeper descents, the bench cut sections… ?

For a lot of new to the sport riders it is technical.

I should pass you on the way. April 10 or 11 by my reckoning. Scottish Borders?

If you want a good place it is worth taking the run and first lap seriously. You save a lot of time not being held up by the queues into every even slightly technical bit on lap one.

IMO, YMMV, caveat emptor ect ect*

* deliberate

Tabata to increase your endurance

10 mins warm up. 10 reps of 20s all out effort, 10s rest. vomit. 5 min watm down 4 ttimes a week.

keeping going is all in the head.