Nice! Brothers an F1 nut so once bought him an F1 exhaust link pipe as a pressie off eBay, by **** the welding was immaculate, in Inconel!

My 2015 Enduro turned up with tokens, taco thing for fitting front mech, some spare linkage bolts, spare cable cleats for down tube, tubeless valves and some cable tidy’s.

Where I used to live one of the two kebab shops exploded overnight. It wasn’t until lunchtime the next day that the police realised some of the defrosting meat scattered across the high street was human.

Where I live now the most crime I’ve seen is kids bunking off from the local school and their stupid parents dropping them off in the morning parking on the crossing or zig zags to let their spawn decamp.

Bookmarked, nice routes there. Nutcracker certainly brings a tear to my eye……

Cataloged over 250 pieces of recovered CSR equipment for sending to the poor 3rd world country children living in a polluted hell hole to de-solder all the components containing beryllium recyclers.

We also pointlessly logged all the serial numbers on a spread sheet for absolutely no reason bar the fact that its a procedure that must be rigidly adhered too (nowhere is there a record of these serial numbers to check what has been recovered against the actual inventory). Still, easy money.

Angle grinder, old oil drum at 0600 after the party, either that or a router on a particularly knotty bit of hard wood.

Worse still are the people that drive at night with the bloody thing in daytime mode!

Great shame TSR 2 never made it to active duty.

General Atomic’s Orion, solar system exploration (and world domination) was in our grasp.

My new one arrives tomorrow, now how to tell Mrs M………

1 km Martin leading

Those wearing white really showing how dusty the cobbles have been. TM has made an attack 3.2 km to go

4.0 km left

approx 35 riders in front group, GT setting pace 6km left

Leading pack relaxed a bit, main pack caught up

Geraint Thomas, Frome, 6-8 riders Nibbles at back of group

Cobbles done, 10km left

Tony Martin mechanical, swapped bikes

Love it

Friston MTB for South Downs singletrack fun.

John Carter is so much better!

AVOID! Rubbish, truly rubbish, 2hrs of my life I’ll never get back.

Freeze spray, X2.

This may end in a disaster.

Mrs M hates them, on day one of our holiday last year she was bitten on the hand which promptly swelled up to resemble a boxing glove. Took a week for it to go down (it looked VERY painful) and meant we only had two rides around Dartmoor instead of 4. 🙁

I also nearly had a huge crash whilst road riding when I realised the fly on that had landed on the inside of my glasses was a horse fly! Lots of braking, whilst trying to get glasses off!

Chewie and Ahsoka can manage around 15-18 miles comfortably if its cool and it’s stop start social singletrack sections. On the fire road climbs they effortlessly trot up whilst you’re having a cardiac arrest.

I tend to know when Chewie’s had enough as he’ll back off on singletrack rather than trying to beat me into every corner and Ahsoka stops hunting every squirrel/deer that comes across the trail.

Hotter weather is less mileage and we tend to arrange the route round water troughs and dew ponds to assist with dog cooling.

Continuous pace, like an open downland ride is also less miles as the higher average tends to knacker them out quicker.

If I want a training ride for me I tend to put in more climbs than flats to knacker me out whilst the hounds get a pleasant trot!

Early stage Cat Ebola, can I have your bikes? (AFTER they been dipped in disinfectant) 🙂

Or it could be washing powder, conditioner, soap, dust mites etc
You don’t even have to change the washing powder as sometimes the recipes get altered and they don’t tell anyone.

Take 11L of old engine oil to the council tip and sneak past the “5L a month police”.

Spare a thought for the poor man that had to endure a coach trip to Scotland from Croydon with my Grandmother sitting in the passenger seat next to him.

Now she can bore/criticise Death to death (which is how we figure she’s still going) and the poor chap was so stressed by her commentary on life’s failings that by Heathrow he’d drunk his drink and started eating the polystyrene cup.

I regularly had to travel with work colleagues by train during the “school run”. One of my colleagues ensured we had the seats around us free from noisy kids by doing a passable impression of somebody with PTSD, fixing the noisest kid with a steely glare before uttering “It’s getting a bit tricky, it’s happening again” whilst salivating slightly.

It helped he was 6ft, very well built, with a skinhead cut and looked a total nutter.

28C in the shade on the South Coast whilst stripping out old CSR kit. Too hot to have a mantrum at the ridiculous number of bolts holding the kit together.

The Avalanche has already started. It is too late for the pebbles to vote.

This will end in fire.

Very apt quotes from my favourite Vorlon.

Won’t be pretty and I’m glad I’m not Greek as I’d be one of those poor b’stards camped out round the cash machine.
What happens when you cannot get cash out to pay for food or your kids proscription?

How long before the looting starts?

The dog obviously watched as today he put a move on me Rossi/MM would have been proud of and high sided me into the nettles. 😀

Murdered old boys hedge with trimmer this arvo and he gave me a bottle of champers as a thank you! 😀

Well the grumpy weirdo who lived next to me moved away(on the Imperial scale of weirdness, using the marooned together on a desert island test, I’d have walked him off a cliff on day one he was that weird).

Other neighbours great but old boy next door in his 80’s is terrifying as wont ask for help so yesterday we had to politely but firmly tell him to stop wobbling about on the top step of his step ladder to prune his fence one handedly with the trimmer and let me do it at the weekend! He has a record of pruning the lead and not using an RCD.

Blitz Cannon from the VC’s or Johnny Alpha’s gun with a No.4 cartridge

Nice ride if it wasn’t for trail sabotage, grumpy dog walkers and tearing the sidewall out of new Honey Badger!

Just had roast lamb which was lovely and the ferrets and dogs have got me a nice minions drinking mug!

Rocky Mountain Element MSL.

Chewie is good for 35mph in short bursts.

Ferret poo, whicker conservatory furniture, cushions, telly remote, brand new teva sandals, ferretvite for poorly ferrets (effectively speed in dogs……), wallpaper (still attached to wall), branches still attached too trees, miscellaneous rocks on beach and final chapter of my book, Mrs M has just reminded me that two floor mats have been altered as well

Chapel Porth at low tide ( sea can be a bit strong) and Hedgehog Icecream (don’t be greedy and have 2 though).

Superfly 9.8, absolute missile.