Waste of time, pubs are rammed, unless you can see a big screen or near a tannoy, you will have no idea what's going on. It's definatly a sport where tv is a bonus, apart from the 3 hour build up.

However if you want to tick a box and say you have been, pack a bacpack with food and drinks and have a wee radio so can tune in to what's going on on the buts you can't see,

Ludlow is a fav of mine. Have stood At the top of the tower overlooking Ludlow many times while Mrs Mantastic performs a sex act. Standing there hands on hips being blown adds to the already long history of such a building

African sleeping parrot-WTF???? If there is a punchline in here somewhere It may be lost on me. If not to the vets immediatley, if not your friends should consider their responsibilities as pet owners.

Call any safari park near you and ask to go on the waiting list for lion poo. IIRC the waiting list at west mids safari park is about two years. Just scatter the lion dung around your garden and the little bleeders won't both you again.

Removing raw plugs from a wall, the obvious tool of choice was a screw driver. Two mins into the job and I had a screw driver stuck in my face. Straight through the side of my nose and imbeded in about an inch. I was a little concerned with the situation, my wife was busy laughing and reminding me NOT to get blood on the carpet.

I get a man in these days for such taxing jobs

Next time rush out and own them with your bombers

I shave my balls, trim the bush and shave my shaft, gives you a nice tidy clean feeling. I don't recall why I started doing it but it's now a habbit. The wife doesn't complain

is off to leisure lakes for a chat this week, I usually ride cannondale and like the stiff lefty fork, need to find out what my options are for the heckler, something thats stiff but fit for purpose.

Cheers for the offer teeto, but am in the midlands so sadly a no go, out of interest what size is yours ( oooeeer) I am guessing but XL would suit 6 ft 2

The Macc Lads and GWAR (check them out on you tube) conflict and the dead kennedys

Currently 18st and plan to do this solo, aim is to be 16st at the start, gives me motivation to get out there and just ride and enjoy. Managed 14 laps in sleepless one year so looking to that for a target. Is this achievable?

The Hurt Locker promised to deliver so much, yet I feel delivered not a lot. I may have to watch it again to give it a chance as I wasn't well when I watched it. BUT I would expect more from the guys that also made point break.

Brain Moore Beware of the dog, its a great book, even though I hated him as a player is a great read.

Marc Beaumont " The man that cycled the world" is an ok read

Bewdley to Bejing – why dont you fly- a book about a local guy (Bewdley) who cycled to bejing from the road I live on.

So I have three on the go, all good

Dress him up as the Stig, Its brilliant, it attracts attention from so many women you cant get your breath. So many people will want photo's of him, some folks even though it was the real stig when we did it.

Chicken pox(in lungs so breathing has not been going well) followed by swine flu has prevented me from riding this year, also prevented me from working. First day back tomorrow and night outing planned on Wednesday

The buy one get one free isn't quite right, they quote you and you haggle till it gets to about to 50% of the original quote, crude but they do come out cheaper than anyone else I have had quote

I was actually stopped by the police for riding hammered. They noticed something was wrong when I struggled unlocking my bike from outside the pub. The police were betting between themselves as to how far I would get before I fell off, upon crashing into a bush they stopped me, gave me a wee lecture and thanked me for the entertainment and told me to go steady on the way home.

I made it home in one piece and all was ok, I now do this most Friday nights and see said officers from time to time, they wave, I wave(carefully as difficult when smashed) and carry on home. Never have they bothered to stop me again, a case of comon sense I think

Smash his face in then ask questions later

In principle a good idea, however did you really have to type so much?

Patricia Mycock used to work for me, known as Pat amoungst friends. She was slightly hard of hearing and spoke very loudly, especially when using her phone at work. I still laugh now at hearing Pat Mycock how can I help you? From anywhere in the office.

When I lived in Scotland had a teacher called Mr McMath and suprisingly he taught maths

Bowler wildcat or a bowler nemisis, end of discussion. You won't be worry about a bit a snow behind the wheel of one of those boys

Try a pan make called "run" superb quality and as long as you oil them after use they will last for ages.

Mat Dawson, teddy sheringham and go compare idiot, I would never get bored offering them my fist

Macpac vamose ( I think that's how it's spelt) quality bit of kit, carry kids upto four year old and they spread the load well over your back. Not cheap but you can wear them all day with no issues

Did you get a goodbye shag?