If you’re concerned about it, sign up for a calorie tracking website like Myfitnesspal. Track your food intake for a few days and see how many calories you are taking in.

“Mr Average” needs about 2500 calories a day. In reality how many you need depends on your height/build and activity levels – but that’s at least a guideline to start with. You can use Myfitnesspal or other sites such as Calorie Line to calculate your daily energy needs. If you are eating significantly under your daily energy requirement, there’s your answer.

I had drug dealers next door to me a few years ago in a rented place. I didn’t renew the contract after 6 months and moved – being woken up at all hours, dodgy people everywhere, and police raids in the middle of the night, after 6 months I’d had enough.

Easy enough to do when you rent though, not necessarily when you own.

The policy on 3 incidences of absence – are you sure that’s not unexplained absence? Because I am not sure that legally, you can be sacked for being sick 3 times/having to care for a sick child etc…..

If you’re a contractor, then surely the impact is just that if you are sick and can’t go in, you don’t get paid?

You have probably reduced your overall calorie intake. That will be why you have lost weight!

Cheese is very calorie dense and tasty so it’s easy to eat a lot of it.

Bread = filler food without much nutrition in it really, especially if it’s refined, which most breads are even the ones that say “wholegrain”.

Go into work and if they think you aren’t fit they will send you home.

I’ve had a look, definitely wary of it!

Just from a feminist POV….shouldn’t make a difference to the colours you dress kiddo in, the colours of the room, or the toys they have. Boy or girl, your child will have its own personality and preferences, no need to gender stereotype from before birth!

Admiral quoted me £750 to renew, told them I got a quote for £550 on comparison site. After a “chat with his manager” the guy then offered me the same price!

GP would probably not discuss aunty’s condition due to confidentiality. But in terms of protection for Granny, might be worth getting the social workers involved.

From experience nobody with a drink problem is going to get help/stop unless they want to. My ex-stepdad was an alcoholic, my mum got rid of him about 10 years ago, he took up with someone else, but she died of cancer and he then hit it big time. After a health crisis he managed 2 years of abstinence, during which time him and my mum sort of got back together for a bit, but then he started to drink again, my mum walked, he went back to his old ways and died of liver failure. Not pretty.

Most alcoholics will need to accept that they cannot touch alcohol, ever, in order to stay recovered. This is a very difficult thing to accept for the majority of alcoholics who have learned to cope using alcohol as a crutch. Most alcoholics will think that at some point they can return to drinking “normally” but this is rarely the case.

Try and resolve it with the neighbour first – ask him exactly what it is that he would like you to do about the situation. It sounds like you have already tried to accommodate his wishes, but there may be a solution that can be worked out without either poison or the police.

Can you get a neutral neighbour to give a second opinion on the noise level? It may be that it actually IS causing a disturbance. Even if it is, it’s not ok to poison someone’s pets, but some sort of further compromise may be needed.

When my younger siblings had rabbits and guinea pigs, they were put in a hutch in the garage at night – is that an option?

good pair of running shoes…..

My dog has peed himself because he’s scared of the thunder!

Friend of mine had a cycle accident recently and she smacked the back of her head on the road. Helmet was cracked, but she managed not to be concussed or have a cracked skull.

They can’t save you from everything, but I think they can minimise injuries on occasion, and I’d rather do that if I can.

If the parents don’t realise kiddo is out joy riding, then they probably think their ban from the car is being obeyed, and thus have no reason to hide the keys.

Perhaps this kid does not realise the enormity of the consequences should he be caught, or hit someone? If parents have a lot of issues (OP suggests this might be the case, family with problems etc) then perhaps they have never taken the time to impress upon their son what could happen to him if he was caught behind the wheel by the police. Kid might just think “oh what the hell it’s a fine and a telling off”.

I actually have a Giant Dash 4 for sale at the moment. Women’s “fast hybrid” – road tyres, but flat bars and easy derailleur gears, triple chainset.

It’s light blue and size S frame.

If interested, email messylittlepanda@yahoo.com

Can you have a word with the kid himself? Tell him you’ve seen him driving this car, he hasn’t a licence, no insurance etc, and make it clear to him the consequences if he does get caught. You could always say you are appealing to his good nature/common sense, but if you see him doing it again, you will report him to the police or tell his parents.

Think about it – if it was a member of your family or a friend hurt or worse by a kid doing this, would you care particularly about the fact that the family is troubled and he’s had a hard life? Methinks you’d be worried about the impact on you and yours more than the impact on the idiot who was driving around without licence, insurance or proper driver training. You would want the book thrown at him.

good timing with your issue earlier in the week

yeah, it does mean that either way I’m more remote from those issues!

Job offers are like buses….I haven’t had any for months, been looking since the start of the year because I knew the restructure was coming and I was concerned since they cut quite a few jobs in my department. I’ve been for something like 6 interviews in as many months, one job I turned down as something didn’t feel right with it, one I got to second interview but they hired internally, and the rest I didn’t get. So I wonder if being offered this one and especially less than 24h after the interview is serendipity…..

I bought a Berlingo in Feb. Love it.

It’s a 1.6, and it can be a MPV with seats up or van with seats down. Fuel economy very good, it’s a diesel, and it’s nice to drive. It can take a decent load (oo-err!) fits two bikes in without having to remove wheels, or we can put our camping gear in and put the bikes on a towball mounted rack.

It’s got so many uses, it’s fab, and after Mr Panda and I struggling with a Corsa for a couple of years with our outdoor lifestyle I’d honestly say it’s been the best purchase we’ve made.

If I find a girl who wants to do all this stuff with me, awesome, but there are few really active girls IME

As an active girl, I have found in the past that being active is a negative for a lot of guys. They want a girl who looks like a Barbie doll – most active outdoor type girls don’t, and shock horror, we have muscle definition. I’ve had negative comments, totally unsolicited, from men, about the way my body looks as a female cyclist and triathlete, and even Mr Panda was not over thrilled with the changes in my body shape when I started to train for events. However, he has seen the difference it makes to my confidence and happiness being fit and healthy and having fun doing events, so he’s kind of accepted that a bit extra muscle tone really isn’t a deal breaker.

I’m on my way to becoming debt free aside from the remainder of my student loan (from back in the day when they were cheaper and you didn’t need to take as much out).

Had a £3.5k car loan – paid that off recently. I also took out a personal loan of £4.5k about 4 years ago, stupidly, to help my partner at the time, because he couldn’t get credit and was in mortgage arrears after being made redundant. He started paying it off, until we split up, and then he stopped paying and I couldn’t get him to pay anything. I was saddled with the repayments, and then I was made redundant. I reduced my payments for a few months, but the reduced payments didn’t even cover the interest and I ended up with a bigger loan than I’d taken out in the first place. I refinanced it in 2011, at a more reasonable repayment rate, and have now paid half of it off, I’ve just got a 0% credit card for 12 months so am going to pay the rest off that way. I focused on paying the car loan off first as the interest rate was higher, so now that’s gone I can focus on the remainder of the other one.

Moral of the story is – never get in debt on behalf of anyone else. Ever.

Do you have evidence that’s it’s physical and not just some mucky pics being exchanged between them?

I have seen them in a “compromising position” yes, so we’re not just talking dirty texts here.

After having weighed up the courses of action, I think the best thing is for me to keep schtum, at least for now. It helps that I have now also been offered another job within the company (was waiting for the outcome the past few days) and will no longer be working for the same boss or closely with my (now less trusted) friend, so it gives me the opportunity to be a bit more removed from all involved and keep my distance.

Some sound, wise, funny and downright ridiculous counsel on here – good old STW!

When you say it’s likely that you’ll be asked if you knew anything about it, do you think that’s definitely the case? i.e. is the company large enough / the connection to your boss remote enough that you may actually be able to keep a low profile and it never be known that you knew?

Nope, I work in a small team, so the connection is not remote, we are a fairly close knit lot. Too close in some cases, clearly! :-O There are some other connections as well that complicate this further but I don’t want to divulge too many details about those involved, this is a public forum after all….but if those involved don’t know I know, then that makes it much easier to keep schtum.

I did wonder who would pick up on the box first 😉

Your friend shouldn’t have told you and put you in this position. I’d dump her before she starts on your other half.

She didn’t tell me. But she also hasn’t been very careful to hide her phone when I’ve been close to her and she’s been sending those texts!

I don’t think either of them know I know, they certainly haven’t said anything to me if they did clock me when they were in their “compromising position”.

So maybe, if nobody knows I know, it might be best I keep my gob shut and allow what will be to be. I guess one of them might grow a conscience/get worried about being caught and end it before it comes out – I doubt it, but they might!

Well it’s at least cheered me up seeing some of the advice on here 😀

Yes, I am female…..and straight, so that course of action isn’t really an option, but at least we think outside the box on here 😀 😉

I saw more than just texts, we’ll leave it at that….your imaginations will probably come up with a much better scenario anyways, so I’ll leave you all to just imagine what else I may have seen!

Haha camo, unfortunately my mate doesn’t have anything I want 😉

They both have kids – it’s awfully sad really.

My OH says stay out of it, pretend you know nothing, but it’s hard to do that when you’re sat next to someone and they are texting your boss’s husband in that way….and then for me to have to try and pretend our friendship is still the same. urrrgh.

ROFL @ Fuzzy – think I’ll pass on that though thanks 😉

You have 2 choices;

1) say nothing now and then be accused of knowing all along and betraying her by your boss when it eventually comes out.

2) say something now and be accused of betraying your friend.

My friend does not know I know. Lets just say I saw something I wasn’t meant to see, but I don’t think they saw me. I did think perhaps my eyes deceived me, but my friend was sat in front of me in a presentation yesterday texting him. I wasn’t mistaken.

I don’t know what to do for the best. My boss and her husband are about to go on holiday together for 3 weeks – maybe the affair is a temporary bout of insanity, and it will end of its own accord, but that’s probably an unrealistic hope!

I worry that if I do say something to her, that her husband will have covered his tracks and will deny everything, as will my friend, and I’ll look like a s*** stirrer. I haven’t breathed a word to anyone at work, I am just considering my options – none of them seem good!

Incidentally, my boss and her hubby had an office affair and left their respective partners for one another a few years back…..pattern, methinks.

Quite shocked how much stick I’m getting for following a diet that works for me. Lot of haters on this thread…

Did you ever see the threads about the iDave diet? If you think Paleo is divisive….

There is an ethical dimension to it as well – encouraging locally sourced produce, sustainably farmed produce, discouraging the use of air freighted fresh stuff and eating seasonally….that said, there seems to be a lot of coconut in the Paleo diet, and I can’t remember the last time I saw coconuts growing in Yorkshire 😉

It’s got some good ideas and has worked quite well health wise for me, but I think some of the philosophy behind it is a wee bit confused!

Hi ellie and well done – keep riding! Nice to see more ladies on here 😀

I know a retired art therapist at my Quaker meeting, she still volunteers doing it in prisons, she talks about her experience in a similar way to King-ocelot.

Think it’s hard to get paid work in this climate though.

Rather be a weekend warrior than a blobby ol’ couch potato heading for obesity and heartattacksville!

One thing I couldn’t do was “fat adapt” though. I couldn’t break away from using gels on long rides – tried the Paleo recommendations of dried fruit, nuts etc, didn’t work, nothing puts the power in my legs like maltodextrin, fructose and a pinch of caffeine!

Well I definitely wouldn’t have got a fatbike wheel stuck….not sure how long it would have taken me to get from Leeds to Sheffield on it though!

just grateful there wasn’t a tram coming really 8)

I do follow something close to it, yes, because of Crohns disease and coeliac, I found it the best way to manage the condition. I’m not a slave to the dogma though – I did give up all grains for a while, but I eat white rice now sometimes and also use gluten free tamari soy sauce and miso in cooking, because I refuse to pay £7 for a bottle of coconut aminos, and I also figure the Asians do pretty well with rice and fermented soy – lowest incidence of crohns/colitis, heart disease, obesity etc in areas where they follow traditional diets.

I found the biggest benefit probably came from giving up processed stuff, cooking from scratch, and eliminating dairy, but an awful lot of people with coeliac disease have a lactose intolerance so no big surprise there.

Mol makes a good point that nutritionally, it’s a pretty sound diet, but that the “ancestral” claims are dubious. What your ancestors ate depends very much on your genetic makeup, and that’s down to the individual. It has also been hijacked by the “body beautiful” types somewhat, which can be offputting, but for people with certain health conditions I think it can make a lot of sense.

Yeah, the Scott did feel quite heavy, hence why I went for an extra £200 on the genesis. That’s not super-light either, but it does handle very well. I had to cut the bar down though as the one that came with it was crazy wide for me.

Glad you’re ok now and you got some help getting back to the car.

Budget?

I’m 5’6, and have a genesis Mantle 20 29er, which I absolutely love, in a 17.5″ frame. I also tried the Scott Contessa scale 29er and quite liked it, but I preferred the Genesis.

depends if she wants to improve riding skills or get into doing more singletrack really….the other option for a low faff bike could be an Alfine MTB? Again Genesis do one I think.

Oh man. I have a Rottweiler, and while he’s soft and daft and a lovely dog and all the rest I still wouldn’t want to put him in a room full of kids to be mithered constantly. Teacher was daft IMO – sure it was done with the best of intentions, but it hasn’t turned out very well for anyone.

I’m surprised the school allowed it (that’s if the head teacher knew), I remember the days of having a class hamster in primary school but most schools won’t take the risk of having any animals around the kids, some parents would sue over a hamster nip these days, let alone a dog bite.

Sounds like it’s universally agreed that it’s not a terrible crime to ride with your small children on a pavement then, providing due care/consideration is taken/not acting like a bellend!

Nice bike to do it on

Two words – padded shorts.