Nasty things Busbars… particularly 12th edition ones when encountered.. they ain’t insulated. Once trouble shooting an automated warehouse nearly put my hand on one in a cab.. my shoulder was gripped firmly and dragged backward with the senior plant electrician whispering in my ear…
“please don’t do that son, i’ll have to fill in a lot of paperwork if you do”

He was 6 or 7 when it happened…

looks like he has been through meatgrinder

ouch

The plastic surgeon is a hero….. “ahhh you have a big arm… we can give you a big penis!”

Brave lad though for going through this publically.. must have something about him as he got married 2 years ago. Wife waiting patiently apparently.

As a youth my perfect way to pop my clogs was dying of a heart attack at the age of 95 at the vinegar stroke whilst being noshed off by some appropriately endowed voluptuous female (in/famous (you chose) whilst spanking a Lamborghini Countach Quattrovalvole (now I am showing my age! ) at 180mph whilst being chased by the law enforcement agencies of at least three major western democracies, the mafia and the entire Guhugvant interplanetary battlefleet screaming

“you’ll never take me alive copper/patrone/ya wee green b’strds!”

after said MI the car coasts to a halt with no casualties… cue hardened crims shedding a tear with the coppers saying “what a guy!”

forgive my ‘hignorance…. but “total immersion” swimming as opposed to what…??? Didn’t think the immersion bit was optional when swimming

“.. ‘ang on, Oi will just step out the back and adust moi arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhhh!”

Okies simpler than setience then how about

“not ded”

“whimper” – on witnessing any TV show involving injuries/surgery to gentlemans vegetables

Vinegar Strokes LLC

+1

though I allways thought it was singular… as in stroke.. mind you depends on the number of participants of course.

Flashy…. your not a denizen of @rrse by any chance? it’s that or you have a doppelganger with exactly the same twisted, sewer level sense of humour

Sentient – is the ability to feel, perceive, or be conscious.

From personal experience, just a wee thought…. what is her sugar intake?

Teenagers and proto-teens if allowed seem to try and live on a diet of energy drinks and sugary coated chemically reconstituted crap. This has a MARKED effect on behavior, basically you are going to get no sense out of a teen (not that there is much sense to get in the first place) that is effectively speeding it’s eyeballs out on a sugar rush.

Couple that with the hormonaly induced trauma that is puberty and you are on a collision course with DEFCON1.

Noticed with the step son & daughter that they were fine in the morning but their behavior at school rapidly deteriorated after lunch… got printouts of their canteen purchases & you can take 3 guesses what the common denominatior was! They were both virtually mainlining cheap energy drinks at lunchtime, so cheap that you can add all of the wonders of e-number colours into the mix plus tartrazine (major culprit in all cheap fizzy drinks) – ye gods and our parents used to panic about us and bloody ribena!

Knocked the sugary crap on the head and there was a marked improvement in behavior and general demeanor at home and school.

Consequences / punishment have to be real as well, rewired their bedrooms so that the ring main supply (to the plugs) was on a separate MCB spur to the rest of the house (OK so I’m an Elec Engineer), poor behavior results in power being disconnected to the room ergo no gizmos, any portables soon run out of power – they have light but thats it. Wi-Fi router passwords are changed, any power adaptors found outside their room are similarly confiscated and hidden. Phones are taken off for MONTHS not days and the SIMS are removed and hidden separately. If they need a phone then they get given a 1st gen Digital Nokia brick with a PAYG sim. 😆

Just a thought….

Watch this

Shame on you Sir!… thats not Manly at all

Hold my pint & watch this!

there its “manned up”

“Just one pint then”

+1

Sah!

I’ll see that limpwristed slur and come back at you with

“interference fit”

also

Gas Axe
Hot Spanner
Solihull Precision Adjustment tool (aka hammer for those who don’t have landrovers)
Three Point Hitch
PTO (Power Take Off)
“letting the smoke escape” – electrical / electronic engineering term for turning a quantity of expensive components in to a rapidly cooling collection of BCBs*

*BCBs = Burnt Crispy Bits

on that theme 😈

“yes of course i love you”
“no I won’t c.. in your mouth”

Man Phrase’s
“it’s f..ked” – engineering diagnosis meaning “beyond further help”, regional variations do exist

“fix bayonets” – british military term, normally a situational summary, has several meanings, to the British these can include
“oh dear, Johnny Foreigner has us surrounded and we’re in the poo”
“oh dear, Johnny Foreigner has us surrounded and they’re in the poo”
To Johnny Foreigner hearing this phrase has only one clear meaning
“oh dear, the tommies have just fixed their bayonets, we’re in the poo – big time!”

Man Words –
Woodruff Key
Autolube
Dry Sump
Bodged
Stilson
Reciprocating
Suck,squeeze,bang,blow

Passed through Gunnison in Colorado a couple of years ago and they have an enlightened local statute that if you are caught by the police/sherriff with a mobile phone/electronic device in your hands when you are driving within the county boundries, the phone is taken off you and is destroyed there and then at the side of the road i.e. sim & memory card removed and cut up, battery taken out and then the phone is stamped on, the remains are sent for recycling.

The police HAVE to have photo/video evidence, but once they have this say ta ta to your toy. The second offence they impound your car for a month, the third… well lets just say nobody has been that dumb.

Local government had an understandable sense of humour failure after a three year old was reversed over by a driver on a phone.. the fact that it was the local mayor’s granddaughter may have had something to do with it. Lovely place by the way… well worth a visit….

Apparently issue of driving whilst on the phone has just went away…..

can give a Greyhound a run for its money

I doubt that. Greyhounds are blindingly quick. Watching one run down our lurcher in a straight line is an amazing sight. (till the lurcher starts turning and said Greyhound ended up on its back sliding across the field)

Hmmmmm…Kelpies are blindingly fast… our Kelpie can pace a Greyhound and certianly out manuver… klepies corner like they are on rails, ours never lets up for berms.. it’s bloody scary how fast she can go, she ocasionally gets it wrong on a high speed corner on damp short grass then its heads, tails and legs everywhere as she desparately trys to re-invert herself! 😆

If we can get video of her cornering then we will as it’s amazing!

Springers… lovely dogs but a but Duracell Bunny like…. “Busy Busy Work Work Bang Bang”… can tick constantly if not completly knackered out.

They grow out of this by about the age of 11 or 12

Oh and as to the middle class snobs who deplore social housing…

Becareful as YOU are the ones in this day and age who are more likely to be end up repossesed and in social housing when the world realises it doesn’t need your “Telephone Sanitiser Advertising Sales Account Executive” or “Corporate Re-Financing Manager” skill set….

There is more nobility and honour in a the most menial job than there ever will be in “middle management” role.

Rule of thumb…

Never ever buy a new build property in a recession

Builders/developers margins are cut too fine, ergo the quality goes through the floor (literally). The cheaper the property the worse it gets

Regardless of the NHBC guaruntee or not, all that means is every major building system (roof, windows, doors, heating, electrics) will have been specced & costed to last just over ten years, i.e. just outwith the NHBC guaruntee.

I have seen some appalling faults, huge snagging lists and scarey construction standards, and sh@tty attitudes even from the “quality” builders and developers, at the lower end of the market this trait is amplified.

No matter what they claim in the advertising they don’t tend to answer to their customers (after all it ain’t exactly a business model based on lots of “repeat business” is it?) they answer to their shareholders, once sold it ain’t their problem really and at the end of the day THEY can afford better solicitors than you and will play the “who runs out of money first” game through the courts.

See it from the inside which is one of the reasons I don’t work in the industry… cynical moi? 😕

and you’ve gotta trick her out of her bed

Typical Ridgie then… lol I’ve had 4!..

want another one but the time isn’t right.. tryRidgeback Rescue[/url]

One Caveat though… Ridgies are BIG dogs and highly intelligent (ergo will run rings round a gullible owner) and definitely not for the first time dog owner.

Currently we have a Black Lab who loves to potter along on gentle runs but the star of the show is our Australian Kelpie “Kona” (yeah I know) who loves to tear up the trails behind us (in front of us/around us)

As a pup

3 months ago with Milly the Lab in Thrunton Woods

When I was a callous yoof had a mate who used to eat raw white tripe and vinegar…. 😕

A small group of us were wandering round town one day during the summer holidays and he he bought some and proceded to eat it alternating between bites by waving it in my face finding my reaction hilarious (just the thought of it makes me retch)…. after doing this a couple of times he got warned by me not to do it again or I’d punch his lights out…. course being a typical teenage lad he just had to do it one more time… then wondered why he ended up sat on his butt with a bloody nose 😛

…ha we couldn’t even afford the “e” on the shobox!

So if I pour boiling water in my sonic bath thingy when I’m cleaning my chain it’ll be even bettererer?

Bettererererer…ererer..er.. than the bestest best best thing ever… er

hmm warm water and sonic bath = no elbow grease = cheating… bah humbug! 😕

Not all of us can afford Sonic Baths….. I remember when we were living in a shobox in the middle of the M62 me dad had to suck on a polo mint to get the bath water warm…

Agree BTW… you can’t beat a hot joint

Standard nowadays…

Insurers won’t insure unless you have tickets to the hilt and have been on umpty trillion courses and got all the certificates..

30 years experience is nothing in competency terms…. 8hrs on a course in Dartford run by our Nev …NOW Your talking!

Petrol… if you can smell it then your clothes are already impregnated with the fuel air mix. Lethal stuff, just turning a light on or off can ignite it – avoid it like the plague…

Diesel…. Leaves sticky residue when dry as already mentioned as Diesel contains a lubricationg agent naturally. So is brilliant for cleaning combustion engine internals, gearboxes, differentials etc. where the lube residue will be diluted by other oils. Flushing oils used to purge manky engines that have gone too long between servicing tend to use a diesel derivative/engine oil mix.

Kerosene/pariffin… think diesel but without the lube agent (ergo why it’s not good to run your diesel car/van on heating oil as the injection pump will sieze(eventually)) good for cleaning.

Water …. brilliantly effective de-greaser when applied at high temp (80degrees plus)… even better when that is combined with high pressure (aka steam cleaner)! Particularly effective when used in conjunction with a detergent like fairy liquid kit needed… plastic tub capable of holding boiling water, kettle, brush.

Won’t explode (unless you are really, really, really clever) is eco friendly-ish – as long as you only put on the reccomended amount of oil onto the chain in the first place then there shouldn’t be that much coming off down the drain should there? 😛

Only disadvantage is you need to dry the chain thourorly thurerley thourgh… completely, I normally chuck mine in the oven after it’s been used.

I think that says a lot about your driving ability I’m afraid. I agree that P2s don’t handle round corners – P1s are far more nimble (but then they’re lighter) but overall the V70s that I’ve had (three now) have all been easy to drive, piece of piddle to park and fine in the snow/ice with stock tyres

I suggest you try driving something else OTHER than a Volvo mate … try a Ford Focus, ANY small Peugeot (306,205,206,207) and a Large Engined Subaru Impreza or Legacy then you will understand the use of the term “handling”.

Drive a Transit, Landrover Defender 90SW, Merc Sprinter/VW Crafter and you will understand the how easy these are to nip around town in , park, reverse etc despite their size – reason – you can see where the vehicle ends. ALL modern passengers cars are too rounded, have too many blindzones due to passenger cabin safety requirements and fuel efficiency due to aerodynamics.

Stock tyres on a 2004 V70 T5 are Goodyear Eagle NCT F1…. they are Z rated… they are designed for dry or wet conditions NOT snow… they have NO “sipes” in them (google it mastermind) try putting 320BHP through the front wheels on snow with them and you will understand.

As for my driving ability…. do you want me to start on about my 20yr multi discipline motorsport career, my ten years rural & urban blue light driving experience with 4.5 tonne vehicles or my experience as an off road and winter weather driving tutor and assesor for the public sector…

Sorry for the hijack, I shouldn’t have risen to the bait but some records just need to be set straight….

I loved the V70 T5 both as an owner and a professional driver but it has its limitations.

Avoid the 850s they are too old, V70s yes BUT they are VERY complex beasties to service i.e. dealer needed… far to many electronics on board.

Definitely not for the home mechanic

I had an ex North Yorks Police T5 V70 ARV…. brilliant bit of kit … phenomonally quick, chipped to 320Bhp (by volvo its std factory mod for ARVs so no insurance loading (they are grp 20 anyway)).

The Antennas on the roof were mine (I did a lot of motorsport Safety) and i left the holes in the grill…. they seemed to have a weird effect on traffic in front of me for some reason

The D5 engines are superb.

Overall loveley cars but not for the home mechanic, T5 was OK on juice (given what it had under the bonnet) D5 is a lot better. Pigs to drive round town they manuver like a barge (long wide crap turning circle) crap in snow on std tyres but fine on winter rubber.. handle well on the open road with the usual caveat that they are a 2.5 ton Front WD car so dont expect to go tearing into a corner like Hannu Mikkola.. brake beforehand and accellerate out…. and never ever ever turn of the ETC/DSC (Traction / stability control) there are seven pages in the manual that explain it’s function but it can be summed up with

“this is a 2.5 ton front wheel drive car capable of in excess of 160MPH do you REALLY want to turn it off?”

Wouldnt touch an XC70 out of sheer self respect… lool

Of course, if I had had a gun this morning then things may have turned out very differently for the girl with the stupidly loud ipod blaring out on the bus on my way to work… 😈

Hmmmmmmm mandatory arming of all cyclists might solve a few road issues too….

Same as a lot of people grew up with playing soldiers, cowboys & indians, cops & robbers, etc. Heros on TV were Starsky & Hutch, The A Team and films loved were the Dirty Dozen, Battle of the Bulge, 633 Squadron, etc prior to the total cultural A bomb that was Star Wars when I was 10 in ’77. that resulted in arms that knuckles that were constantly bruised from “light sabre” battles.. ..

As a kid in the 70’s WWII was still very much part of the recent social memory too. We had real heros they were our fathers and Uncles and grandparents who had seen service, I played with Airfix & Action man, we all did – it was aspirational. I ended up in the TA for 5 years as a result of going Army Barmy in my teenage years.

Are we not seeing a reflection of our society’s now deep affection for our armed forces, are children simply not aspiring to their real life heros…. or is it just me..

Could be yours for £20 posted.

XL – but more like L

Alan.. nice thought but I have tiny hands… like Small & XS

Here’s my Marin Quake 7.1… gorgeous but weighty at 20Kg, but an amazing AM rig with 7″ suspension travel. One you get used to pedalling it its a formidable bit of kit*

*the advantage is that once you can pedal 20kg uphill with relative ease then you get on anything else and take off like a greased whippet without breaking sweat!

Geometry is very different I think… Cyclocross frames are deliberately designed for off / on road use so you can get your head up (more sit up & beg MTB stylee) as opposed to a racer which you are dropped into a streched crouch. The BB is higher A CX frame will have more mud clearance too and longer reach brakes.

I would suspect that CX frames are designed to flex wheras a road frame might not be so forgiving.
I would be wary of the carbon road forks off road as they may not be designed for the sudden shock loading you get say if you hit pot holes etc. They will be engineered to withstand a constant loading.

If its for the odd foray onto a dirt path or in snow then the CX tyres will be fine but if you are looking for a dedicated comp beast then there may be issues.

That said CX started as a form of winter training using road bikes with knobbly tyres.. so you may have no issues.

Between the inner and outer, shells of a safe the vois is usually filled with insulation, steel and cast iron bars and anything else thy have handy to stop drilling and penetration by an angle grinder

Looking at the age of the safe did they have portable angle grinders back when it was made… ????

Got ya…. sort of know where you are coming from now.

I’m assuming that this is into the crank spider ergo a blind hole.. it will be ally (hardened but still soft as butter in engineering terms). And it’s gonna be M4 or m5 so its small.

You NEED to find a bench drill as any attempt with a hand drill will end in tears, the spider needs to be locked up so it can’t move as does the drill even if you are drilling a pilot hole in the bolt for the extractor, precision is the key here.

Issue I have had with extractors particularly at this size is they are very, very brittle and any lateral play and you will snap it. Bitter experience would lead me to reccomend overboring it and popping a helicoil insert in.

Personally, if you haven’t got the kit then hand the job over to someone who has, but also weigh up the economics… is it going to be cheaper to just replace the crank and spider than pay someone to do it.

One last trick in the arsenal… if you haven’t got the gear is have you tried heating the spider, prior to trying to turn the remnant of the bolt… hot air paint stripper (or a hairdryer) will do the job, soak the remnant in WD40 (other penatrating oils are availible) for at least an hour then gently warm the spider, if you havent got a bolt extractor then try a self tapper screw (at least it’s mild steel, ergo can be drilled out) you would be surprised how effective this can be. Don’t over torque the self tapper going in and don’t heat it either.. the temp differential can be just enough to persuade locked threads to free off…

just a thought…

Otherwise rachels shaped charge idea sounded good

Helicoil kit If its in Ally then drill the WHOLE of the remnant out and insert a Helicoil thread repair, this depends on size of the original.

If it’s in hardened steel, drill and tap out to a slightly bigger size, but to really advise need pics of the offending beastie 🙂

Who or what is a MrShmancy and why was he nosing a beaver filled with spaff (yours or not)(or was it MrShmancys spaff)

oh & gimme a pint of what you’re on…

used to work for the same firm

After a brain fade like that .. no wonder

Basically the rule of thumb is ANY vehicle that doesn’t have to be hooked up to a laptop is simple and easy to maintain…

If you are looking at a landrover then go for the Ladder Chassied, live axled versions roughly Pre TD5 era… and there is a HUGE following and plentiful parts suppliers but its a love them or hate them thing (i am VERY biased). the defenders are basic as in BASIC but bullet proof (well not exactly but you get the idea) and this is refelcted in pricing (hold prices well), discos more comfy and the classic range rover even better. The hippo (freelander) is a capable wee beastie but they have had a few reliability issues and can be VERY pricey to fix particularly transmissionwise.

Don’t buy a landy in winter… the price goes up by £1000 if it’s snowed recently…. mid summer is the best time as all those that bought them just for the snow get sick of them hanging around, dripping oil everywhere and intimidating their normal cars.

The 300TDi engined ones are the best of the Diseasels and the 3.5 & early 3.9 V8s the best of the Petrols, Defender is simpler to maintain than a discovery (electrics & body rot), DO NOT TOUCH a P38 Range Rover with a barge pole (i.e. 2nd generation) as they are just aproblem waiting to happen adn when it does its dealer time, take care with the later classic range rovers though the 3.5 V8s are pretty reliable (if somewhat thirsty).

Landys are simple to maintain and fix and are VERY reliable with the proviso that they require more regular service intervals than a normal car or van….