Never liked Cotic for some reason.

I need to go find out about the NS Surge now…..

I'm heavy and clumsy (read untalented) which is why I want the high tyre volume and, at least, potential for a longish fork.

I'll have a gander at the Evil SOV and Dialled Alpine…..

New – don't like 2nd hand for heavy duty….

I also want a glass of wine mind…..

Either are great.

The IOW has some fabulous long routes around the south half of the island. And great pubs in most villages.

BUT – I had a great ride on Purbeck a few years ago, the best bit was eating sandwiches in a graveyard and spotting a slow worm.

As a preference, I'd go IOW, but simply cos there's a tad more choice and the coast is generally a larger part of the ride.

Only organic shit.

Or M&S

Sainsburys finest shit at a stretch.

Anything else isn't going to make you grow up big and strong…

rhymes with gone

Wrong……

Scone (rhyming with Stone) half
Thick layer of Strawberry Jam
Thick layer of clotted cream

Repeat for other half

Job done.

Well, at least that's how BA serve them in business class flights to the US…..

Turn that upside down and it's the Devonshire way!

It's a poor concept medically as the third person in the centipede really would not get the proper nutrients for strong bones and shiny hair.

More interestingly one needs to think about whether it's better to be the butt muncher for, say, Angelina, or have Brad munching on yours…….

It does all give a sense of clutching at straws for ideas to shock 13 year olds though……

Idiots! What matters is:-

Scones (as in Stones)

Scones (as in S-gones)

Scones (as in Scooooooones)

None of the above matters if you can't pronounce it properly!

I've been sh!tt!ng blood and blood clots for about a week now since my rectal surgery.

Not sure if that helps but I like to share 🙂

If you find Douglas Baders legs in there I'll buy his left one

LOL. Reminds me of a joke.

There's this guy, 40, never had a girlfriend. His mates all rib him about it but he always says – "I won't have sex as my mum said if you put your thingy in a girls thingy, she has teeth, and she'll bite it off".

Well, his mates get sick of this eventually and club together to buy a lady of the night for him.

They shove him in a room with her and she starts asking what he wants.

He gets nervous and says "My mummy said if I put my thingy in your thingy you have teeth and you'll bite mine off"

She just laughs and takes his hand and lets him touch her. "Can you feel any teeth?", she asks.

"No, but my mummy said if I put my thingy in your thingy you have teeth and you'll bite mine off".

So she strips off and stands in front of him. "Can you see any teeth?", she asks.

"No, but my mummy said if I put my thingy in your thingy you have teeth and you'll bite mine off".

Losing her patience she lies on the bed, spreads her legs and opens herself as wide as she can. "CAN YOU SEE ANY TEETH!!!!".

He has a good long look, and then replies.

"No, but I'm not suprised with gums like that!"

Iron Maiden – Phantom of the opera
Velvet Revolver – Slither

Come on peeps. This thread is about blistering guitar. This should sound like the flames of hell lapping at your souls……

Send me his email address…….

It's an easy drive. Have a stop over in the UK and get an early ferry?

Took me 8 hours (Calais to Morzine) and 7 hours the other way. The French roads are excellent as are the drivers road manners.

The only comment would be take snacks! The French road side services are rubbish! You'll queue for 10,000 years for a manky croque monsieur or the loos. Just do as the French do and stop and wee in the car park, eat your snacks, move on.

Oh, and it's easier to have a co-pilot to stick a credit card in the toll machines (wrong side innit otherwise…..)

I'd happily drive again. The bonus of being able to take lots of kit / spares / bikes far outweighed the hassle of travelling by air.

Just don't park near my house! **** van drivers!

From the post title I thought you were going fox hunting!

Either way, good luck.

Wouldn't bother.

If the road is a pain to get down you'll be forking to have that fixed. If the garage is too small for a modern car you'll be tearing it down.

Also you'll have two title deeds to sell if you want to move – which can put people off.

If it's just only ever going to be useful as a workshop for bikes then the selling audience is limited. I know this isn't the be all and end all but it is worth considering when splashing your beans on property…..

Hmmmm. Tell me more of this quarry…..

I'm occassionally up here with the bike and fancy somewhere a bit less flat to ride 😉

What's a Wilkinsons?

You're taking me into unknown territory here……

But I see just as many fat, blotchy people in Waitrose as I might in Tesco.

Hmmmm, it's an interesting point Talkemada. Perhaps I have got it wrong. Perhaps there is an even spread of uglies across all the supermarkets and I just don't "see" them in Waitrose. After all, they do say you tend to hunt amongst your own when looking for potential in the ladies…….

But nothing I have said is snobbish – it's simply an observation. If Woolworths was still open it would be the benchmark of ugliness – but it isn't. So all I'm saying is there does seem to be a certain aesthetic grading between the supermarkets.

Oh, and no picture, you shop in cheap supermarkets and I worry what you'd do with it 😉

Indeed young Woody.

My next supermarket study will be looking into where people with no sense of humour shop. (lidl judging by the responses)…….

No. Really no picture of me is needed.

It's like skin cream. Use it and stay younger looking and wrinkle free. Don't use it and look like Dot Cotton by the time you're 30.

Shopping in Waitrose IS my beauty regime. I'm sure I've spotted wrinkles since going into Asda.

I stand by my assertion. People who shop in the more quality supermarkets make more effort and look better for it. Those who are more concerned with filling thier trolleys with cheap food look, well, cheap……

It's like the old saying about owners looking like thier dogs. Same us true for supermarket customers – with Asda being the Staffordshire Bull Terrier of the world.

Edit: sorry about the spelling. I'm typing this from my iPhone

You don't need a picture of me. You just need to know I shop in Waitrose. Nuff said.

But, I think my original thought has been lost. It's nothing about snobbiness, more a general observation that on my supermarket oddessy today the people got uglier as I descended down the value chain.

I'm sure jaffa cakes sold in Aldi are the same as those in Waitrose – they're just eaten by less attractive people.

Oh. And thanks for the tip about Waitrose in Lincoln. I need a nice organic beef joint tomorrow and Waitrose do an excellently trimmed one 🙂

Every good troll is part based on fact.

And, the customers in Asda North Hykeham are the ugliest supermarket mob in Lincoln. FACT!

I went for a ride. Not to the coast mind but along Lincolns boring network of flat cycle tracks

I did however find an encampment of hillbillys living near the river (east of town). They were frightening in an amusing sort of way…..

The whole ride just reminded me never to live here long term 🙁

Look. I wasn't suggesting the quality of produce was different (although it is – has anyone eaten Tesco value beans? It's like a tub of red water with one rock hard bean in it).

I was simply commenting on the ugliness of the customers. I am a statistician by training and there does seem to be a correlation between cheapness and ugliness.

But, to be fair, even I understand that ugly people need somewhere to shop……

No – you're missing the point, or is there even a point.

Is it better to pay £2 (for instance) for a box of Jaffa cakes from a shop with attractive people, or get two boxes for £2 in a shop full in badly dressed, in bred morons?

Personally – I'd worry the Jaffa cakes would taste of common people……

basspine – that website is priceless.

Picture 5 is hideous!

Sainsburys is "ok" to be honest – although the one in Welwyn Garden City seems to be staffed entirely by gods special people…….

I found a FULL hyperdermic syringe in the chiller cabinet one day (full of what I do not know). I told the manager who proceeded to just pick it up and say "job done". It didn't seem to occur to him that it might have been in some diseased junkies veins!

I will shop in Tesco if they have televised offers on specific branded goods. But not otherwise…..

Woody – I'm not suggesting any of them are poor quality in terms of goods – just in terms of customers.

Are you ugly?

Oooooh, Morrisons – they've got one of those here. I'll go try it tomorrow……..

Hyacinth would not have gone into Asda in North Hykeham. Seriously, any more drool coming out of peoples mouths and I'd have needed wellies!

It really wasn't nice!

And people looked like they'd slept in their filthy clothes! I got up, washed, put on clean jeans and a clean shirt and looked half respectable.

Most of these mongs looked like rejects from a zombie film.

On the plus side – Flash Spray with Bleach was only a pound a bottle (guess they don't sell much to the normal customers……..)

No, it doesn't.

It looks slightly grey out now and there's a big bumble bee in the garden. Perhaps I should stay in?

I mean, accidents can strike at anytime!

Are you my dad?

I'm more mean sober…….

Video does tend to flatten things it's fair to say, but it doesn't look that bad……

But then people ride different things. Gnarly to one is flat to another. It's nice to see people giving stuff a bash and getting excited about clearing it.

Divorce is good for you – it's character building.

And you're never too old to start over.

For me life is about being single, but that state is punctuated by periods of sex, followed by unhappiness, followed by divorce. It's the circle of life……

Lol. I can't compete with ancient philosophy!

I still think a compass and a map will not find you trails in Swinley. And if he can't find his car then a trail of breadcrumbs is probably more use…..

The OP go lost and had to ask how to get back to the car park. If the OP had used the map (and / or compass) he would have known that heading South with a few corrections would have got them back to the car park.

lol. I'm not a small man or angry. I'm a jolly fat fecker.

But to the above. If he was lost around lower star post how would heading south have helped? It'd have gotten him to the Old Dean but that's not a good place to go.

I think the point is instead of being so critical why not offer some useful advice, such as Crazy-legs above (doing the local Gorrick races is a great way to find the best singletrack)

Swinley is a friendly place. Just ask to tag along with a group.

Mine were £25 from Boots. Braun clippers. And they will do upto about an inch in length on the longest setting, right down to a few mm.

Good for pubes too.