Great thread!
Our little girl is 19 weeks so just got through the rougher stuff and getting slowly settled into a routine.
My wife and I both work shift patterns but she will be on maternity leave for 9 months whilst I’m back at work. Our closest relatives are 2hrs away and We also have a 17 month old working cocker. She did not have PND but here is a few tips that I found usefull.
Having our dog was great as my wife had no option other than to get out the house once a day.
We went to NCT and as a group we have all stayed in touch. WhatsApp group for the blokes and wife’s mean advice and support is always there. Had a belter of a curry with the guys last week.
Get a good baby carrier and take the young Un for a long walk and let your other half have time off. The dog helps here. My wife is like a refreshed person if I take everything off her hands for a couple of hours.
If friends come round be brutally honest. If they want a cuppa or beer, they get it themselves AFTER, they’ve emptied the dishwasher, hung out the washing etc. As our family live so far away we rely heavily on neighbours and mates.
Knock the biking on the head until you are in a routine. Either commute to work or get good lights and go out at night when baby is in bed. It’s teamwork.
You will both fallout as it’ll feel like you are both on the wrong page, but this is down to tiredness so take a deep breath and count to 10.
We find that if both of us help out with the bath it’s a really good bonding experience.
Start the bottle ASAP with expressed milk. It took our daughter a while to get what the bottle was and it was a bit of a battle. Wife is giving up the books soon and going onto formula. This way she can get more time off.
It’s hard but when she smiles it does make all the difference. I don’t think over all I’m happier than before. Sometimes I feel like a good cry and that my wife doesn’t think that it’s also hard on me.
The main thing to remember is it gets a lot easier.