I have a 18-200VR and always get comments on size of lens.
Until….
Went to Farne islands a month ago. Jeez theres some big lenses taken to those islands! Got talking to one guy with a Nikkor 400mm prime (about £4500 by all accounts!!) Wife had a look through it and went…wow thats amazing! It made the image from my 18-200 look like a cheap point and shoot!
So, while there is no prospect of me ever spending that much on a lens, the chief of the treasury does accept that there is better than my lens and accepts in principle that I can get a nice fat telephoto at some point in the future.
I know this doesn't help you choose. Can't remember the model, but there was one on Warehouse Express that was an f2.8 that looked interesting. But I think it wasn't SWM or VR.