Merkintastic! Bullheart and his technicolor knacker-jacket…

I’ve just nailed a series of hipsters on staggeringly expensive fixies through Fitzrovia, on my shite beater bike. One of them commented on my unusual hydration bladder/rucksack combo. When I explained that it was full of chemotherapy, pumping into my arm at four second intervals, he grinned and stated that my bike might well be shit, but I quite clearly had balls.

“Bald ones” was my response.

Strong people on this thread. Proud to stand with all of you.

Is that a bald patch on your grass? Tsk…

Oooooofff! That is magnificent!

Keith; the ride is on fella, I can assure you of that…

We’ll done for keeping on keeping on. It’s the small things that lead to the ‘winner winner chicken dinner’ moment.

Back in the Cancer Hotel now. Very nice, very swish. Drapes are tres classy…

4/5th’s. But that includes childcare.

(CAVEAT) Clearly, I have not put my bald boatman in a cardboard toilet roll tube whilst in the bath (CAVEAT)

[…yet]

Just like the view I have in the bath. With added empty loo-roll tube.

However, I’m sure my old chap is happy. Like a bald pink otter lying in a pungent, denim-lined pool.

…and as if that wasn’t bad enough, I’ve just been to the loo to measure how much pee I’m getting rid of-monitoring dehydration and the like.

This will be a problem. Mainly because most of it is down the front of my jeans.

So I’ve shuffled back to my chair, with my bag ‘o’ Mesna in front of my crotch, covering the most toxic splashbomb known to mankind. It smells of roast chicken, and as I’m typing this I’m eyeing up the other patients in order to work out whether they’ve noticed or not.

This is a less than good day….

Hello all,

I feel like shit. And am currently arguing with a clueless staff nurse. And am sad because my pubes are gone.

I will complete a full update this weekend. If I’m not incarcerated for beating someone to death with one of those cardboard piss cylinder things.

Bullheart

I imagine the first steps will have been a referral from the school SENCO to the local authority SEN department. Prior to this there will have been discussion between the school and parents, possibly raised over a period of time by classroom teachers and support staff, around issues relating to academic performance, socialisation, friendship groups, OT, etc. a variety of different teams might be required for further investigation, including CAMHS, OT, SALT teams, whom will coordinate information to (if ASD is a correct diagnosis) build what used to be a Statement of Education Needs, but is now know as an EHC Plan.

Don’t know about your situation, but if both of you work together it will enhance your childs prospects and chances. I regularly deal with the fall-out of broken families, and it is always life-limiting on the children.

Regards,

Bullheart (Assistant HT, ASD/C & I Secondary School)

EDIT: Very thorough breakdown above.

I’m just pondering new STW names for when you beat this as well.

There are two I use on the Team Bullheart jerseys:

Bovo Sapien

Turbovine

Hello All,

Chemo starts in 2 weeks.

Lots of glum faces, red eyes, weeping.

And that’s just as we went through Croydon on the train…

I’ve always been an abject failure, pretty much in most things. If I could balls it up, I would. I intend to carry on this tradition in dying – I reckon I’ll royally f*ck it up and end up alive.

Typical.

Both of my daughters laughing together.

Hello all,

Firstly, thank you for all of your kind words. Whilst I hadn’t forgottten the impact of STW support the first time around, there does tend to be a ‘distance over time’ aspect that can make you forget the significance of other people having your back.

There is no further information regarding the swelling. We know that the ultrasound very clearly shows three sites on the chest wall muscle, which would tie in with the metastases on my sternum. I am booked in for both a PET MRI and Cardiac MRI (although I think this is a red herring; there are none of the physiological traits that marked the first time) and there is no doubt that the responses from the Ultrasound team at UCL and my own oncologist denote a sense of urgency and inevitability about what is transpiring. Prof. Hall-Craggs is very much regarded as at the top of her game internationally, and she told me that, despite having over 30 years experience of oncological ultrasound, she had never seen anything like what was happening in my back and chest at this point in time.

The irony? I don’t feel unwell. Back hurts a bit, but I’ve got two kids under four; we’re doing a lot of work on the house; my work is busy and I haven’t slept in the family bed since my second daughter was born last August. So theoretically there are any number of factors that could lead to the extensive swelling in my side. But in reality I think there’s only one explanation.

I’m a very, very lucky man. Over five and a half years ago I was given less than sixth months to live. I was instructed to prepare myself. I received so many pitying looks from people, including former friends and family members. But since then I have experienced the utter joy of fatherhood; of being part of a matrimonial union that (though sometimes difficult) changed my perspective on lifelong commitment; having my faith restored in humanity by the unselfish nature and abject kindness strangers. I’ve been a better man in the last nine years than I ever would have hoped to be before, having spent most of my days bitter and jaded prior to the healing process of meeting my astonishing wife Megan and realising the true meaning of love.

So as before. Get the diagnosis on Friday. Batton down the hatches. Ignore the odds. Destroy the cancer.

Because as Junky said:

Not now Cancer. I’m busy

Ooooh….

I’ve a hankering for a Mk 11 Cortina with a Savage conversion now.

(…Pops into online account. Trudges out again)

Great news fella…

This thread is useless without pics.

I’m so very, very sorry for you all.

Not sure what else to say.

I’m in the area, and I like grapes. It’s a date! And you’ll be disappointed; I’m dumpy and smell of almonds…

PM me and we’ll sort something out.

Hello Keith,

Are you up for a visit on Sunday?

Smashing news! It’ll be a long road, but you’re prepared, and that’s half the fight…

I live in Tunbridge Wells. It’s okay. People are a little up themselves, but so be it.

What an astonishing thread.

Vassago Jabberwocky

It all sounds less bleak than in the early days, so for that reason I’m delighted for you. Although you clearly have a pragmatic side, and this will help for the future.

Cougar is right though; if you’re not safe and functioning, it’ll all fall apart. So make sure you look after yourself as much as you look after everyone else.

Best wishes though!

Just put in an £89K bid to build a 3km MTB track in our school grounds… :wink:

Not according to my toilet this morning. More of a ‘Type Eight: Dead Otter’…

(Technically Type Zero, but I wasn’t happy with the detail…)

Indigestion Wednesday?

LFGSS is my default forum. They went through a radical change fairly recently; all members were invited to comment on the process by the fella that runs it. There’s minimal advertising, avatars, PM’s, and all very user friendly. The forum self moderates too, it really is a community.

https://www.lfgss.com/conversations/131364/?offset=3850#comment11762439

Maybe worth a look for the STW bods? Might aid the detente process…?

You forgot.

“I told the mods along time ago why I won’t subscribe”

None of us can recall that of course.

:lol:

Best thread this week.

So argue.

Much lols.

I’ll have the salmon.

Best of luck fella, thinking of you and yours…

I’m not condoning the acts or trying to bring up a discussion on how you define criminal sexual acts, but it is just a certain, small part of their lives, deliberately hidden. It’s very presumptuous to think you could intuit it from their other behaviours.

Not sure I’d agree with your final point; the compulsion to carry out the act usually overrides caution, which can lead to patterns and trends emerging. Trouble is, by that stage, you’re dealing with reactive measures, rather than predictive/proactive strategies…

Tom and I became friends at the school I trained in. Same age as me, sharp, witty, gay and a bit of an diva, but nonetheless there were a group of us young teachers that hit it off. I even helped him move.

http://www.batleynews.co.uk/news/local/teacher-had-3-000-child-porn-pictures-1-1331751

And in the same school, John was the HoD for Maths. Heavily involved in youth football in Liversedge and Cleckheaton, he ran some of the football teams at BBEC. He had also mentored me in my GTP year.

http://www.examiner.co.uk/news/west-yorkshire-news/kirklees-teacher-jonathan-craven-14000-8362477

I had no idea, not even an inkling, as to their perversions. I’m currently one of the DCPC’s for my school, and have always had a suspicious nature, but I missed these two. Haunts me to think that I might have inadvertantly put students in harms way during my career, but at the end of the day a career in education will always be appealing for predators.

Very little that can be said that will offer any comfort, although I hope you take some from the support you have here. Folk on here saved my life once, so feel free to pm me should you want to chat about anything.

Thinking of you all…

Being given six months to live, due to rare metastatic cancer.

I’m picking up a rather special PA at the end of the month; a ‘big wheeled’ prototype Mike has found for me in the shed…

Best 26″ bike I’ve ever owned bar none.