"Stairway to Heaven" by Rolf Harris.

'Nuff said!

I asked BG to come in and quote for a new boiler last year. The cheapest they said was over £4k. I then found the exact same boiler to buy online for less than a grand and I'm sure that paying someone to replace wouldn't cost £3k.

They did mention more building work though. I am sure the building regs change constantly to keep them in business!

Me 🙂

Before anyone else says it!

Or I'd say Chris Hoy at the mo, or Lance Armstrong…

Is that somewhere near Trowell? It looks familiar, but I can't quite place it, somewhere west of Nottingham right? If so, you probably commute quite close to me, although I'm on the road, I don't think I could cope with Belper -> Nottingham off road every day.

Hi Joe

It is just after Eastwood, near Annesley, a Google map location shows it as this point: 53.050217,-1.267784.

I wish I could commute from Long Eaton to Trowell; it would be a lot quicker…!

Up the gravelly hill. You wouldn't believe I'm a few minutes away from the M1 at this point!

Big hugs – Awwwww!

See there really is love on STW

I couldn’t possibly comment on this topic; I seem to cause trouble when I do 😀

Something I’ve been meaning to ask – how do you slap a tank? ❓

perjorative

Common misspelling of pejorative.

pejorative

Disparaging, belittling or derogatory.

Hmm…. I wondered why my spell-checker kept highlighting it! Now I have learned something!

Ta! 😀

OK, finally I’ll bite.

So far, ernie, you have been rude, insulting and nasty about me and not covered any of the questions asked. Enough.

When I first made the comment I didn’t know if the OP was male or female, gay or straight. The disclaimer was there because, believe it or not, some people find it extremely offensive to be considered attractive to someone who may be the same sex and see it as a sleight against their sexuality. Some even react violently; I know from experience. You’ve never been in such a position, I would guess, so perhaps think before deciding to get angry.

You, on the other hand, decided it was an insult. Now your turn.

Please tell me, ffs, what the insult is? Did I say something like ‘oooooh, you’re straight therefore you’re not as good as me?’ Did I make a comment regarding the OP’s colour/sexuality/whatever? WHAT WAS THE INSULT?

Oh, of course, saying that someone may possibly be attractive is the same as saying ‘oh you must be straight and therefore evil, and must be destroyed’. Obviously. I should have seen it earlier. God help us on Friday because the A&A thread must be akin to being a satan-worshipper!

Grow up ernie. You took a very slight joke and decided, since in other postings I have had the affront to say something like ‘stop using the word gay as a perjorative’ and that has caused you to get uncomfortable. If ‘jey’ means lycra-clad XC’er then I apologise for not apparently reading MBUK (which I only read a long long time ago) and not knowing this designation, or, again, obviously, being in your clique. People come and go on the interwebs and as a result your clique will get smaller and smaller until you’re in a clique of one.

Meh, and if you think this will push me away regarding the issue of using gay as a perjorative, think again. Now I guess this thread will get closed – you have a bee in your bonnet regarding something that isn’t what you think it is (I’m channelling Rumsfeld there).

I thought you could do that without a docking station? Laptops usually come with an external VGA port and some USB ports for keyboards/mice/memory etc.?

The worrying thing for me is the *post* of Home Secretary.

Ever since the 1980s every home secretary appears to have been taken into a room and had their soul removed so they then come out and become the most fascist swine since, well, the last one. Throughout the tories and now labour I cannot remember a single home secretary that I thought did a good job or stopped to even think about what they were doing, in the name of ‘knee-jerkedness’.

A pox on all their houses. Whoever takes over, even if it was Jesus or the Buddha would turn into a rabid b*stard after their inauguration!

Yay! Iodine/thiosulphate (note the proper spelling 😀 ) titrations!

Good luck! Relax. And remember:

Although her life was long and placid
She added water to the acid
She didn’t do what she should oughta
That’s adding acid to the water

Old chemists never die, we just reach equilibrium…. 😀

Larry was OK. He had some interesting characters in his routines: Bow-legged Betsy and Fag-ash Lil. I was too young to see much of his stand-up; mainly his game-show stuff.

Les Dawson, however, I found hilarious.

Pretty funny in her time.

I think we’ve seen the last of Lily too, shame. Saw her in ‘Prisoner – Cell Block H, the Musical’. Hilarious. I got quite a few of my best queeny lines from her too 😀

Watch out for ‘Veet for Men’. My partner used it to remove a few stray straggly hairs on his chest and it got very itchy.

As a hairy bloke I wouldn’t; you will end up with really painful hairs and loads of spots where they break through the skin. Perhaps something like waxing would be better (a la ‘back, sack and crack’) as the hairs grow back naturally and not as a sharp edge? Sounds ferkin’ painful though!

Actually both the question and the answer were really rather useful imo.

Because now it has firmly been established what the rules are.

The rules (according to you) are that no one is allowed any laughs at the expense of gay men. You on the other hand, are freely allowed to get laughs at the expense of straight men.

I think I’ve got that right, yeah ?

Erm, no.

Any answer I give will be responded to with the now-used ‘intellectual bollox’ non-answer, obviously, but..

People take the p1ss out of me and my sexuality continually. No issue there. Joking is fine. But using ‘gay’ as a derogatory term is still abusive. You can talk about *me* and my sexuality in a joke as much as you want. I fail to see where I used the term ‘heterosexual’ as a term of abuse in my comment, however, if Gohan is insulted by this then I unreservedly apologise – to him, not to you.

You don’t seem to understand the difference between someone taking the mickey and someone hurling abuse. Take the mickey out of me all you want. The moment I sense vitriol I’ll shout, generally I will laugh.

But this does appear to be somewhat over your head. I still don’t even know if Gohan is straight or not. You do. Amazing thing omniscience; I wish I had it like you appear to.

In effort not to get this thread closed I’m backing off – there is no use discussing this with you as you want to be offended by proxy. But, yes, anyone using ‘gay’ as a term of abuse will be called up on it.

btw RB, I was expecting a lot of intellectual bollox. So no disappointment there

Well, ask a silly question and you get a silly answer…. 😀

But as headfirst said:

getting back to the point, I’ve just read the ‘giving up’ thread and was nearly in tears – its a great example of where the love is

I think that demonstrates that the ‘love’ has not gone and is definitely around. If the only aspect of non-love is there some minor idiocy regarding terms of abuse that may be deemed acceptable by a 14 year old then I think we’re OK on the ‘love’ side and STW forums are generally a happy bunch!

As someone who has no sense of humour at all, can you explain the joke to me ? Is that you’re poking fun at Gohan because he’s a straight guy

I see your problem and will attempt to clarify. The joke was in the phrase ‘love’. I used the word ‘love’ in two meanings. The first meaning, which I believe Gohan stated was more of a brotherly or fraternal love. I then used humour to add in a second form of ‘love’ which is usually denoted to refer to either coupling (as in an intimate partner) or even sexual. Hence a simple swap of meanings. This occurs a lot in humour; I suggest you read up on it.

This form of joke in some forms is known as a ‘pun’. Often, in Terry Pratchett’s books it is known as a ‘pune’ for some reason which I do not understand; I’m open for elucidation.

The reason for said pun was the complaint regarding the mis/use of the phrase ‘ghey’ and ‘jey’ or whatever silliness was abounding at the time and repercussions from people (I would guess including me). Hence the thought to produce said ‘pun’.

Obviously, not knowing Gohan I could not say whether the person in question is male/female/gay/straight/bi/asexual/black/white/any_other_colour etc. I don’t assume. ‘Cute’ could refer to any sex as far as I’m concerned. You appear to assume however, unless, of course, you know this person and I’d have to take your word for it.

Did that clear it up?

Hey Gohan, post a pic and if you’re cute I’ll show you where all the love goes*….

😆

* A joke for the humour-impaired….

Actually we do know how. Its a combination of the placebo effect and reversion to the mean.

Seconded. Next we’ll have homeopaths on here telling us it works, so there!

The only way is with double blind trials. That would show an effect if there was one to be had. It wouldn’t say how anything worked but it would show *something*. So far – nowt.

Placebo effect is very strong though, as has been shown with – you guessed it – double blind trials.

Hmm… ‘Katie’ and ‘Peter’.

Troll? That woman with unfeasible large boobies and Peter Andre?

Sod *that* for a bunch of monkeys.

When given wedding lists I take a look and if there is nothing on there that I want to buy I get something I think is a appropriate at the price that is appropriate. While I can see a wedding list is a useful thing to stop getting a hundred toasters, some people do tend to take the p1ss and treat it as a fantasy shopping system.

Buy a gift from both of you. You were invited as a couple, gift as a couple. And never feel you have to do something because someone decided to click a lot on John Lewis’s website! 🙂

My Bloody Valentine. Iconic band and I got into them just as they were about to fall to bits. Or, more likely, yawn to bits as they are the laziest band in the world.

Ask him if he’s really called Hugh Wemmbley-Hogg.

Any form of nuts. Evil nasty things. The devil’s droppings. Almonds and peanuts are the worst.

They actually make me ill, but I’m not allergic. I just throw up all over the place.

Yes, those of you who know I’m gay can stop sniggering now! 😆

Oh I forgot –

Anything by Clive Cussler. Badly written (apart from very precise descriptions of cars) and completely stupid plots. Non-sequiteurs rule!

Yet another post re: gay. Make way for someone who gets a lot of abuse regarding this…

To be honest I see these threads popping up now and then and I see the point of the OP with the following:

1. To those t*ssers who answer people with “This thread is gay!” – seriously – grow up. You sound like a fat spotty 14 year old boy who lives his life in his bedroom doing nothing but w*nking over page three girls. And has a bike that costs £5k but can’t use it.

2. To those idiots to say “Ah yes, but we’ve cunningly mis-spelled the word so it no longer says ‘gay’ so we can make whatever we want out of it, nudge, nudge, wink, wink’. ‘Ghey’. ‘Jay’. Get real. You sound like someone who is six months older than the person in (1). With less charisma.

I still don’t understand why people keep saying things are ‘gay’ in a negative way. They seem to think it is a bad thing. I can assure you that it isn’t. Wouldn’t be any other way. You get dress sense*, an uncanny ability with soft furnishings* and – most important this – I can get away with things with my female companions that straight men would die for**. Talk about boobs? No problem. Talk about sex? No problem.

Seriously – why would you think that being gay was negative?

* – may not be 100% true
** – is very definitely 100% true

I got 26% and I am really 100% gay. Kinsey 6, don’t even think about womens bits and bobs. Yech.

“Stranger in a strange land” by Heinlein. After a while of being interesting it starts to exhibit the somewhat rabid views of the author as opposed to the character.

“The name of the rose”. Ye gods I was so sick of the ‘oh god we are not worthy’ crap after 50 pages I just didn’t want to even consider it any more.

Apart from that I’ll read most stuff.

Buddhists don’t care about sexuality that much. If you’re ordained as a monk though then any sex is a big no-no. Even with hamsters.

Who’s Alan Shearer?

If slightly stupid people dislike benders, what’s the problem? I’m sure some Gays dislike some stupid people.

Benders? Bloody hell it has been a long time since I was called that.

SamThomas – some of my friends are, erm, ‘straight’ but having sex with a woman? Disgusting. Ewww, ewww and thrice ewww! They have strange ‘bits’ and boobs and stuff*. Unnatural. Pass the sick bags. Should be banned! Quick! Write to the Daily Mail!

Still, they are my mates after all so I must be tolerant. Even though they are disgusting pervs.

* – for the humour impaired I think women are fab, I just don’t want to have sex with them. 😀

A mate of mine at work is constantly trying to get into girls’ knickers even though he’s married. I think he’s managed it a couple of times too.

Then he finds out his wife has done the same (though with blokes as I’m sure he’d be over the moon if he could see his wife and another woman go at it!) and hits the roof. Swearing, stamping, whinging etc. Quite comical.

If I were the poster then I’d join a swingers club – or would your wife having sex with someone else be an absolute no-no but it is all-right for you to do it?

I wouldn’t throw him out of bed… He would have to beg, mind! 😀

An answer I can give for that is written in the Bible, Gospel of John, Chapter 11, Verse 35

Erm:

“Don’t chuck bricks at cows when on a unicycle.”

EH? Sheesh, Or did you mean Space Corps Directive #68250 or even Space Corps Directive #34124?

I have written to my MEP regarding something that was of interest to me and I received a well-written reply.

BUT

My local MP is a 100% ‘Blairite’. I checked her up on the web and she rarely if ever goes against the party line and never on anything that could be considered in any way important. I know that if I write to her regarding things which I definitely am against (or for), e.g. National ID cards, I know I will receive an identikit letter talking party b*llocks and avoiding the question. There is no point. For all she’s worth on national issues you may as well take her job away and give it to whosoever is the party leader at the time.

tiptoes in…..

IR35!

tiptoes out…

You’ll be looking for one of these then:

Bodygroom

Apart from that, no comment 😀

As long as the tax is paid, what’s the problem. I’ve had 2 or 3 jobs on the go and everything gets declared on my self assessment.

Plenty of problem. They are paid to do a job for us and not bunk off. Furthermore due to their position they are in a position of power and privilege – making of laws – which leaves them open to accusation of corruption as they can vote on their second ‘jobs’ interests and raise laws based upon them. I don’t believe your second job has those perks… They can talk and meet with business – that is to be expected and needed – but not work for them. Pure corruption.

I believe that the pay structure for MPs should be reformed – give them £150k, no ‘entitlements’ and no second/third/fourth/fifth jobs. And if they leave parliament via their own or voters choices then they cannot join an industry in which they were a minister for ten years. If they can’t deal with that then they can get the **** out of parliament because all they will be doing is feathering their nests on our tab and screwing up the legislature based upon who pays them the most money from their other ‘jobs’.

Angry? You bet. Corrupt bar-stewards, the lot of them.

Oops, sorry. Yes, that’s the one.

I won’t donate my grammar either 🙂

I must admit this subject gets me miffed.

I can’t donate because obviously being gay means I’m going to be full of HIV.

But I apparently can donate my organs.

I don’t understand – HIV testing takes quite some time and organs would be full of the virus if you were to have it. Which means that the organs should not be used, but are requested anyway.

Therefore, based upon this sort of dichotomy I have decided that if they want bits of me they either take the lot or nowt. My name is not on the list, neither will it be, until someone can justify this contradiction.