Both of my boys are on the spectrum. aged 7 and 5. Oldest is classic Aspergers, youngest only has a mild diagnosis (process related and emotional.)
Like you it was a bit of a shock at first, we always suspected, but that doesn’t make it easy news to come to terms with.
The good thing to take is that now you know, life will be easier to manage, and manage it you should. For us, routine is everything. Our whole house is setup to help them now. Walls are plastered with planners and symbol charts to help them know whats coming next and what order things are to be done in. This makes the world of difference.
Sure there are dark/difficult times, they will come and go, but they will be there.
I don’t use the chat forum much but my email is in my profile, if you want an ear to bend then drop me a line.