Instant personalised verbal abuse

f* skinny balding speccy short arse c* you look like a …

f* black silent death beardy c* (while cycling wearing a bright jersey and black gilet)

Well, what you have here are examples of the multiple embedded power insult. Each of the above could be wielded as a perfectly acceptable one-off observational insult (eg you skinny ****). In these cases however the protagonist is stringing together two or three observations to make one power insult. For sure a certain element of quick thinking creativity is needed, but as remarked above, this ability is nurtured fairly young in the school playground amongst people of a certain mindset.

My favourite insult is the legendary “You motherf*****g f******g f***”. See also David Boon’s description of the state of his back..

While on witty retorts, there was batsman Eddo Brandes who when being sledged by Glenn McGraith with ‘OI fatty… how come you’re so ****ing fat?, replied “because every time I **** your mum she gives me

Must have seen that 100 times and it still makes me laugh.

A couple of other great ones from cricket:

When Darryl Cullinan comes out to bat after a long-term injury, he’s met by Shane Warne who has dismissed him a number of times

Warne (who struggled with his weight) – “I’ve been waiting two years to humiliate you in front of your home crowd”

Cullinan – “Looks like you spent it eating”

And

Dennis Lillee to unnamed batsman – “I can see why you’re batting so badly mate, there’s a bit of s**t on the end of your bat.”

When the batsman inevitably holds his bat up to look at the tip of the blade, Lillee says – “Wrong end”