After an estimated seven and a half years struggling, expending innumerable Watts on slightly sticky drawers in a big chest and a double of bedside tables, I finally spent 15 minutes taking all the drawers out and rubbing a candle on the sliding surfaces.

A stunning revelation. I felt so clever then so stupid for not doing it sooner.

Then I rubbed candles up and down the pain-in-the-arse wooden curtain poles. Maybe if I’d done that sooner, we wouldn’t have lost so many curtain rings to fatigue and we wouldn’t have so many attravtive zip-tie replacements.

I’m drunk on success, and red wine. What else can I wax?

Around the edges of the doors if they creak when you shut them?

Bikini line?

Bit of candle wax on a saw blade can work wonders.

Body hair. You’ll move around faster for same energy consumption due to less drag.

Post pics.

Lyrical.

Shoelaces, stops them comng undone so easily.

Mustache?

zips, makes them zip much better. And unzip, if Mrs Ned is sufficiently impressed by your slidey drawers that she feels the need to get to your drawers.

Bikini line?

Bit of candle wax on a saw blade can work wonders.

You’re braver than I am!

Multi point door locks on front and back doors.

Wax anyone not pulling their weight. Costs less in energy, food and acts as a good way to raise beds in the garden.

Furniture polish on your seatbelts to keep them retracting in a timely efficient manner.

Car wax on your bathroom tiles and grout to keep cleaning efficiency up.

(Not tried either of these but furniture polish on the curtain rails is a favourite)

Off

on

Shoelaces, stops them comng undone so easily.

Is this real?!

Gibbous moon

Spray your uPVC window and door hinges and locks with silicon spray.. everything moves better with a little lube

Is this real?!

yes. Also stops them getting all soggy 🙂

Good quality car wax on everything; it makes things feel smooth and shiny especially kitchen worktops. Failing that, Mr Sheen or Pledge. Waxed windows are muchy easier to clean as the cloth glides without sticking. I’m a bit of a wax fanatic.

PVCu windows do need maintenance, I oil everything with 3 in 1 oil especially the receivers to stop them going grey and manky.

Your wick…
🙂

your Dolphin?

All your floors – swap walking for sliding.

Also, your jacket. Especially if you live in the country.

Be warned, be slippery slope t’ flat cap and whippet.

Bikini line?

Bit of candle wax on a saw blade can work wonders.

You’re braver than I am

Great point.

DON’T GET CONFUSED

bees

All your floors – swap walking for sliding.

All you had to do is keep house and have dinner ready on the table and now you’ve killed her husband  and your grandson is going to grow up in a delinquent single parent household then go to prison or die of a heroin overdose and its all your fault you silly woman.

I wonder what happens if you spray an old Goretex jacket with Mr Sheen or Pledge? Seriously. I have a Sprayway jacket that I bought in about 1994, it’s kept me dry for years, got patches on it from falls, and I soaked it in Thompson’s water seal which didn’t kill it but made it even better. Maybe an aerosol wax would help the repellency?

Wax your wife’s hands.

So she can wash the dishes more quickly of course.

Wax your pussy for more efficient….?

Not the windscreen.

Skis obv’s

We use compressed air at work to blow optic fibres down tubing to get customers connected. (or did, we don’t really install tubing anymore but will still use spare capacity) With a bit of luck and experience you can get about 1200 metres in one go.

My older colleagues used to spray anti-static furniture wax into the tubes to reduce friction and get the fibre to go in easier…unfortunately they later realised it rots out the rubber seals in the plumbing style pushfit tubing connectors. That results in lots of leaking connections and a fibre that keeps getting stuck, and having to open loads of joints to replace the connectors!

Ruby

bumhole. One square of bog roll, one wipe, done.

saves lots of trees and energy in downstream processing.