Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 42 total)
  • Farts. Do you ever grow out of them?
  • mellowyellow
    Free Member

    Had the Mother-in-law round the other day and she Farts a lot.. a real lot. Getting out of the car. Getting in the car getting up from the Sofa you name it. Even farts climbing stairs, one per step. Our daughter thinks its the funniest thing ever, I do too. Mum-in-law acts as if nothing has happened which I think makes it even funnier. Wife says dont say anything as she will be mortified.
    I must confess here I think farts are just funny end of. I cannot fart without laughing even when alone.

    So..Has MIL grown out of fart humour or is it a generation thing?
    I hope the later. Dont think I can live without this kind of humour once I get to a certain age.

    mattyfez
    Full Member

    Not sure, I don’t fart that often, maybe once a day, but if I’ve been on the ale, christ I can clear a room in minutes the day after. Sometimes they are so abhorrent, even I feel sick.

    I find it highly amusing, those around me don’t seem to appreciate the texture of the air, some of them can be pretty violent smelling, this only further adds to my amusement.

    thegreatape
    Free Member

    Girls grow out of finding them funny. Boys don’t. Accordingly, women don’t find them funny, men do.

    slimjim78
    Free Member

    My nan, god rest, blamed her flatulence on a gall bladder operation. ‘Trapped air’ apparently. I tried to explain that the volume of air required to sustain the previous 10 years would’ve filled the Albert Hall.
    She was adamant.
    (Not Adam Ant)

    chvck
    Free Member

    I’m going to be against the grain here but I can’t say I find farts funny. I don’t find them unfunny, they just are what they are. Then again I also don’t bask in the smell of my own farts either, but I do fart a lot and trying not to fart in the office is quite hard work…

    mellowyellow
    Free Member

    Slimjim
    Love that..trapped air.
    this has made me realise even talking about farts make me laugh.

    Read your post to the wife, she is now even more convinced Im just ”sick in the head”.

    convert
    Full Member

    Your MIL probably has IBS. It’s no fun. Constantly feeling bloated and needing to rip one out but not being able to do with confidence for the fear of follow through is not the stuff of comedy gold.

    thegreatape
    Free Member

    chvck – sounds to me like the mental burden of your situation has made farting joyless for you. Just go with the (air) flow and let rip, and perhaps the sense of post-fart jovial well-being will return to you?

    needing to rip one out but not being able to do with confidence for the fear of follow through is not the stuff of comedy gold.

    Paper wedge then. Muffles them a bit but makes it safe.

    slimjim78
    Free Member

    For me it’s the sound, smell AND feel that tickles me. Literally.

    this has made me realise even talking about farts make me laugh.

    Johnny Fartpants of Viz is proof that even reading a good fart out loud can be enough to enduce a chuckle.

    ”ttthhrruUUUUUUUUp’

    ‘quack!’

    ‘PARP!’

    simmy
    Free Member

    Girls grow out of finding them funny. Boys don’t. Accordingly, women don’t find them funny, men do.

    My mates missus laughs at our farting and farts like a bloke herself….

    mellowyellow
    Free Member

    I am literally cracking-up with laughter.

    We even have a ‘fart stooge here’ Farts are funnier when theres a stooge present.

    thegreatape
    Free Member

    My mates missus laughs at our farting and farts like a bloke herself….

    I will concede that there are a few enlightened ones (women that is, an enlightened fart is something else altogether).

    milky1980
    Free Member

    If you don’t find farts funny then you have a problem with your sense of humour.

    Girls grow out of finding them funny. Boys don’t. Accordingly, women don’t find them funny, men do.

    I know plenty of older ladies that find farts hilarious, one will quite happily drop one for comedic effect whenever the opportunity presents itself 😀 She’s normally a very straight-laced woman!

    CaptainFlashheart
    Free Member

    Farts are like children.

    Your own are a constant source of hilarity and pride. Those of other people are disgusting.

    shortbread_fanylion
    Free Member

    My son, aged 3, doesn’t seem to find them as hilarious as I do, nor fart with my frequency. My daughter, aged 1.5, does!

    GlennQuagmire
    Free Member

    Absolutely not. They’re one of life’s great pleasures. And free. What’s not to like?

    And even better in the bath.

    scaredypants
    Full Member

    I don’t giggle, that’d be childish, but I do point a pair of imaginary sixguns whenever I let one go

    rickmeister
    Full Member

    rip one out but not being able to do with confidence for the fear of follow through is not the stuff of comedy gold brown.

    FIFY

    twinw4ll
    Free Member

    Nope, my wife recently begged me to stop eating eggs, i eat lots of em, she recons our bedroom stinks of sulphur, seeps out of the walls apparently.

    egb81
    Free Member

    I find it hilarious when my girlfriend farts. Less so when I do because mine smell horrendous.

    lobby_dosser
    Free Member

    My mum, 70, still goes into a fit of the giggles after she announces ‘oh I had a sore stomach there’

    squirrelking
    Free Member

    Well I’m in tears now and thankfully its not because I let one go.

    “quack” nearly ended me there…

    My wife isn’t so impressed. My daughter would be. She also has impressive comedy timing such as sitting down hard or when jumping.

    Cougar
    Full Member

    I got funny looks at work the other day.

    It seems that when you’re wearing headphones, farts are only silent to you. Who knew?

    Cougar
    Full Member

    “quack” nearly ended me there…

    As another STW poster once said, “like a bag of flip-flops falling out of the loft.”

    Drac
    Full Member

    The effects of codeine wore off on me yesterday. There was some pretty spectacular bum trumpeting going on in the bedroom to which my wife also found hilarious. I then took some good coffee to get some motion behind it too. Sadly I forgot and banged out another anal acoustic this time followed by bit of splattering. I stopped being brave for the rest of the day at that point.

    idiotdogbrain
    Free Member

    I’m going to go against the grain as well here – I don’t understand why people find them so funny. I find plenty of other things amusing, so I’m fairly sure my sense of humour is still there; it’s just that flatulence isn’t one of the things that makes me laugh. Still, it’d be a boring world if we were all the same..

    Cougar
    Full Member

    *parp*

    Sorry, stood on a frog.

    paulneenan76
    Free Member

    Personally, I think farts are the funniest thing in the world. My 4 year old farts when jumping, coughing, laughing, using me as a climbing frame to back-flip on, and we all find it hilarious. They are odour free, purely acoustic. Wife might fart in her sleep and that’s hilarious but not in public, typically. Farting in the shower is the funniest though. The water cascading through the trump exit creates a sound like a duck being strangled. If it’s a whiffy one in a shower cubicle thiugh, it can be overwhelming, sickening even.

    benmotogp46
    Free Member

    My kids find “Pull My Finger” hilarious!

    Rrrrraaaaasssssssspp!!!!

    loddrik
    Free Member

    Farts maketh the man

    makecoldplayhistory
    Free Member

    At 32 I certainly haven’t. My nearly 2 year old, from the back of the car last week said. “Mammy listen!” then farted followed by “That funny!” whilst his 4 year old big bro killed himself laughing in the next seat. My wife frowned whilst I wiped a proud tear from my eye.

    The irony is, wifey is the biggest farter in the house.

    I personally love it when my children cough or laugh and a fart comes out.

    My favourite moment as a teacher was when a 3 year old was having a tantrum, stamped their foot and surprised themselves out of crying with a very loud fart. Brilliant!

    Malvern Rider
    Free Member

    Our little dog (audibly) farted on my lap last Friday. I couldn’t stop laughing as he kept glancing fearfully around at his arse and letting out small intermittent scolding barks at it. Until convinced it was gone. 😀

    This thread reminds me – the air-biscuit, trouser-parp, bottom-breeze or bum-thunder is rarely so delightful as here:

    [video]https://youtu.be/Tk-5RVMerfI[/video]

    scud
    Free Member

    My 7 year old daughter thinks it is the funniest thing on the planet, to the bottom she has developed a whole “wiggle dance” to go with them, she always lets rip whenever i tickle made funnier by her comment:

    “Daddy you know you shouldn’t tickle me, you know my tickle circuit is connected to my trump circuit!”

    newrobdob
    Free Member

    “Daddy you know you shouldn’t tickle me, you know my tickle circuit is connected to my trump circuit!

    Thats REALLY dangerous if it is common to all!!

    My brother (PeterPoddy) and I find Mr Brown saying hello the best thing in the world.

    I think I am better in my bum trumpeting than my brother, I have reduced him to helpless tears on a number of occasions, rocking on the floor like a baby, due to my anal fog horn abilities.

    I was worried recently I had lost the ability to make smelly trumps. However a recent bout of pant coughs (paaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh or ffffssssstttttt!!) so eye wateringly toxic NATO became involved I could relax and stop worrying. Which also helped things too!

    PeterPoddy
    Free Member

    Rob – I nearly had to roll out of the car at the lights that time, I was laughing so hard I couldn’t breath, remeber?
    That was spectacular that one.

    sargey
    Full Member

    The surprise ones are the best, followed by the saying more tea vicar?

    perchypanther
    Free Member

    more tea vicar?

    ….and perhaps a scone?

    Is the correct response to this enquiry. Always.

    RustySpanner
    Full Member

    sargey – Member
    The surprise ones are the best, followed by the saying more tea vicar? a bit more choke and she’d have started…

    thegreatape
    Free Member

    more tea vicar

    No thank you, it makes me fart.

    squirrelking
    Free Member

    Well I’m in trouble now, my daughter kept correcting my wife when she was reading her Dancing Ballerina book at bedtime. “She farted onto the dance floor. Her farts were graceful and elegant”.

    She’s taking it into nursery on Wednesday as it’s her favourite book.

Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 42 total)

The topic ‘Farts. Do you ever grow out of them?’ is closed to new replies.