[Closed] What to cook to impress a woman?

Chips is only ok after your both legless on the way back from the pub, they are NOT dinner.

Bloody Southerners.

not gravy.

northerners 🙄

My wife has just told me to stop laughing. I do most of the cooking now, but it's not how I wooed her. She's not a very good cook, so it's not how she wooed me either. Do a roast, but ask her if she minds making the gravy, if she gets the Bisto out she better have some other womanly skills. If on the other hand, she starts stirring flour in to the roasting dish, get down on one knee now. (I think I have failed in avoiding innuendo fodder)

Steak with a red wine sauce and sweet potato fries worked well for me. And enchiladas (proper ones not old el paso kits). Both are some of her favourite meals so it may be worth asking her.

If on the other hand, she starts stirring flour in to the roasting dish, get down on one knee now.

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Mussels in white wine.

emsz -
She's a laaady
AwoahAwoahAwoah
She's a laaady

OP get her pissed - then giver her chips.

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Steak with a red wine sauce and sweet potato fries worked well for me. And enchiladas

Wow she has quite an appetite!

Drac - Moderator

Chips is only ok after your both legless on the way back from the pub, they are NOT dinner.

Bloody Southerners.

Shit or bust

Fugu

MAYO with chips. were you lot bought up by animals? 🙄 😆

Check out the lemon curd thread - it bought someone to orgasm apparently. 😯

I once tried lemon curdling.
couldn't sit down for days.

Lasagne. With a side salad, olives and garlic bread.
Prep it all in advance, set table, pre-heat oven.
When she arrives, great her with a nice bottle of wine and attentive company.

Of course if she reads this post you might not have to cook anything . 😀

Erratum

Serve the awesome [s]chick[/s] thick cut chips in their own bowl so that you can share

Bangers 'n mash if she's a good eater (if she's a stick insect, you might want to scale that back a bit)

But like this:
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Rather than this:
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Bonus points for using the most knob shaped bangers you can find... 😉

If you pay my brother 500 quid, he'll come round and cook you a Michelin start standard dinner and you can pretend you cooked it.

We think this is a fair price for you rich Audi driving upper middle class bastards.

I'd also suggest lots of veg
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Of course the way to woman's heart is potato cooked in fat used to scoop up more fat.

Just order the best Fish & Chips in the town. Warm it up in the oven before serving etc.

Then get one or two bottle of good wine not more than £5 per bottle from Co-Op and you are set to go.

For dessert just get some ice cream.

There you go plenty of time to relax over the wine later on or if you get lucky you should be shagging ... make sure not to eat too much/full.

Alternatively, if you want to be complicated then you can try to cook the Chinese 3 cooked pork i.e. Hakka style pork belly and taro like this.

This is one of my favourite dish ... if you can cook this properly you will have no problem pulling any girl on this earth.
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Do Not let the look deceive you. If you are in Chinese restaurant try to order this and if they are a good Chinese restaurant they should have this dish.

😆

apart from the vegetarians, eh chewkw? 😉

honestly though, if she's actually coming to dinner, it doesn't really matter what's on the table, after all she cooked a bad meal for you, it's not like it's the end of seeing her, right?

Although if some-one gave me heated up fish and chips, I'd have to think very carefully.... 😆

Cook exactly what she cooked but much better*

Her reaction will decide if she's a keeper.

*don't do this.

emsz - Member

apart from the vegetarians, eh chewkw?

Vegetarians no problem I suggest cooking Indian Chana Daal with naan bread.

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honestly though, if she's actually coming to dinner, it doesn't really matter what's on the table, after all she cooked a bad meal for you, it's not like it's the end of seeing her, right?

Ya, I was once offered boiled haddock in salt and potatoes ... after the dinner we stayed together for several years.

Although if some-one gave me heated up fish and chips, I'd have to think very carefully....

C'mon, Fish and Chips is the national dish ... besides, what's wrong with heating up if you order it say 20 mins before that?

errr limp greasy batter, slightly warmed through fish, and oven soggy chips.

yummy

emsz - Member

errr limp greasy batter, slightly warmed through fish, and oven soggy chips.

yummy

Ok ok ... no fish and chips ... d'oh!

I am trying to recall my time having fish and chips with my ex ... oh yes, she did not say much ... d'oh! I was happy though ... 😆

timidwheeler - Member

Lasagne. With a side salad, olives and garlic bread.

I married my wife on the strength of her Lasagne it was sublime.

But I didn't get it for 2 years after marriage......

MrOvershoot - Member

I married my wife on the strength of her Lasagne it was sublime.

But I didn't get it for 2 years after marriage......

😆

So what has she been cooking and what's her best dish?

You have been conned / trapped ... 😯

As much as I love fish and chips I'm with emsz on this one.

Save that for after blustery coastal walk while you sit with your legs over the harbour wall.

Having said that I once managed to turn a spin class into a very successful cheap bottle of red and takeaway pizza* date.

So take her to a spin class then she'll be to tired and hungry to care what you serve.

*the wine was known to be good and the pizza was stonebaked authentic style.

errr limp greasy batter, slightly warmed through fish, and oven soggy chips.

yummy

OP whatever you can cook an you think is your best dish then cook this

or and this is pretty radical so think carefully but ask her what she likes! Careful with this approach though as little good can come of this.

I said as much chewkw, I think the phrase was "married under false pretenses"

To be fair she did cook some super stuff in between, these days I do all the cooking as her MS means she can't do anything. I've found a real love of cooking & she says I'm a much more inventive cook than her?

Though she got taken into hospital today so I'm sat here eating Red onion & sweet potato bhajia at the moment

Co-op Argentina Malbec red wine is good at £4.75 😀

MrOvershoot - Member

I said as much chewkw, I think the phrase was "married under false pretenses"

To be fair she did cook some super stuff in between, these days I do all the cooking as her MS means she can't do anything & I've found a real love of cooking & she says I'm a much more inventive cook than her?

I see. Good on you!

... now try cooking the Chinese 3 cooked pork for her.

This is a very authentic Chinese food not many Westerner knows but[u] [b]make sure she is not allergic to taro or yam [/b][/u]as that is one important ingredients ... as well as fermented tofu.

Sorry chewkw see my edit 🙁

But I will have a go at that pork seeing as I work in Liverpool and we have a very good range of Chinese supermarkets I think any ingredients should be easy enough to get.

That Pork does look good Chewkw.

*eyes Chinese menu on notice board.

MrOvershoot - Member

Sorry chewkw see my edit

But I will have a go at that pork

Ahh sorry to hear that ...

Hope she is going to be fine.

🙁

jambourgie - Member

That Pork does look good Chewkw.

*eyes Chinese menu on notice board.

Usually it's called Pork belly with yam/taro but I doubt they will have that one notice board. Not all chefs want to cook this as the preparation takes time as the pork is cooked 3 times ... boiled, fried/grilled and steamed ...

But if you see Chinese ordering them then go for it. Might be more expensive than other dish but this is proper stuff. 😀

Sadly I think she is starting to suffer cognitive decline and has pulled back 20 years in her mind as she keeps asking me about stuff that happened back then as though its the present!
She's being kept in overnight for observation as the carer called the paramedics at lunch time due to her strange behavior.

See my other edit

MrOvershoot - Member

Sadly I think she is starting to suffer cognitive decline and has pulled back 20 years in her mind as she keeps asking me about stuff that happened back then as though its the present!
She's being kept in overnight for observation as the carer called the paramedics at lunch time due to her strange behavior.

See my other edit

😐

Being serious for a sec, try a hot chocolate fondant. It really is a piece of piss. Follow Ramsay's recipe below with or without the Tia Maria. Whatever time suggested just keep an eye on them and wait for the very top centre of the pud to raise up to the same height as the edges (which will rise first). Pop out and serve hot with a dollop of whisked double cream with a hint of vanilla.

http://www.redonline.co.uk/food/recipes/gordon-ramsay-s-chocolate-fondant

Always an impressive dessert IMO.

Forgot to add - depending on the size of your mould, I make two larger fondants from the above measures. Bigger is better where these are concerned.

http://www.jamieshomecookingskills.com/recipe.php?title=bolognese-sauce-with-pasta

Do this so you can have the sauce ready and simply concentrate on cooking the pasta to give you time to concentrate on other things. The beauty of this depends not so much on the ingredients but rather on for how long it is cooked. I did it with pork yesterday and made two women very happy.

A bolognaise sauce breaks the golden rule of early date food, if you get the eating wrong it can make a right mess

Or it gives you the opportunity to show your table manners with finesse.

A chick I shared a house with brought home a big block of stilton and asked what could I do with it, and I did chicken in stilton and asparagus thingy. she was super impressed.

12 years later, we got babies and houses.

so play cant' cook, wont cook. get her to bring an ingredient and you try to make something up. if its shit you can laugh about it.