Forum search & shortcuts

The film of my life...
 

[Closed] The film of my life...

Posts: 6
Free Member
Topic starter
 
[#1526535]

... appears to be being written by someone who couldn't get a writing job on Ally McBeal again, and I'm increasingly concerned that I'm being played by McKenzie Crook. I found myself leaning on the doorframe of someone's office and saying "hey" in a sympathetic manner this morning.

I urgently need better writers please, a really good costume with leather bits and epaulettes, Chris Ryan to choreograph the major fight scenes, a new female lead and some 3D stuff with giant reptiles. And I want to be played by Matt Damon again.

We're not going for critical acclaim and stupid, poncey remarks about it having beautiful cinematography here, we're going for more excitement, more explosions, more reptiles, more flesh, more gunfights and some massive helicopters.

Now. Dammit. 👿


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:19 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Is your favourite fantasy 'two lesbians probably... sisters... you're just watching'?


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:23 pm
Posts: 21661
Full Member
 

Have you seen "Stranger Than Fiction"?


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:23 pm
Posts: 6
Free Member
 MSP
Posts: 15842
Free Member
 

I have just written a gay porn scene for you, big bubba will be along in a moment, he will be your co star.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:25 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

IanMunro - Member
Is your favourite fantasy 'two lesbians probably... sisters... you're just watching'?

Just watching??? You're sick.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:25 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Moments of my life could have been written by Jan Svanmeyer...

... and others, by the scriptwriters for Shameless! 😐


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:26 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

life is like a p0rno. It takes too long to get to the good bit and before you know it you're a dribbling mess.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:27 pm
Posts: 57455
Full Member
 

Bring out the gimp.......


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:27 pm
Posts: 6
Free Member
Topic starter
 

Thanks MSP. I'd like to hold on to a 15 certificate for this though, so there'll need to be a pot-plant in the way for the fisting.

Then can we get onto the helicopters attacking the giant reptiles' breeding ground?

Ta


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:28 pm
Posts: 57455
Full Member
 

howsabout a cameo role in.....

[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:28 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Anyone watched 'Happiness'?


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:39 pm
Posts: 31075
Free Member
 

Will it involve a roll of damp-proof membrane BD? if so, can I be an extra? 🙂


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:43 pm
Posts: 6
Free Member
Topic starter
 

[i]Anyone watched 'Happiness'?
[/i]

[url= http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Happiness_(1998_film) ]"In his review of the film, Roger Ebert wrote, "...the depraved are only seeking what we all seek, but with a lack of ordinary moral vision...In a film that looks into the abyss of human despair, there is the horrifying suggestion that these characters may not be grotesque exceptions, but may in fact be part of the mainstream of humanity.""[/url]

No. Nor am I going to. Have you watched Mega-Shark vs Giant Octopus?

[img] [/img]

Imagine this, only with far, far more aliens dressed as air hostesses.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:45 pm
Posts: 23377
Full Member
 

I too would like giant reptiles, helecopters and lesbians but I would also like a scene where Ray Winstone decapatates Phil Collins with a shovel.

[img] [/img]

+

[img] [/img]

+

[img] [/img]

Whilst being taunted at by Frank Sidebottom and a Fiona Bruce.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:54 pm
Posts: 6
Free Member
Topic starter
 

I like your thinking Harry. 🙂


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:56 pm
Posts: 23377
Full Member
 

Why thank you.

Fiona would be covered in mud and/or beans BTW.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 1:57 pm
Posts: 16
Free Member
 

beans i think 8)


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 6:39 pm
Posts: 16
Free Member
 

beans i think 8)


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 6:40 pm