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[Closed] Stupid names for kids

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[#9318023]

When are people going to learn?

Just covered a Year 5 lesson today. Calling out the register and noticed that I had a kid named after a famous film star. (Joaquin Phoenix)

So in my best foreign accent I attempted to pronounce it....

"Wha...King" I said.... only to be met with the entire class correcting me with a chorus of "It's pronounced JOE A KIN."

Jesus weep. What were his folks thinking? At least teach the poor bugger to say it properly.

And don't get me started on the number of "Ethans" who call themselves "Efan." IT's a TH sound!!!!! FFS Do you think the guy in Marvel Comics with the big hammer calls himself "FOR" no it's THOR!!!! FFS

Even had a Year 10 girl in my class last week called "I'eshia" Nope the apostrophe was not a typo and no it was not a cultural thing. It was just that her folks wanted her to be different!


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 5:46 pm
 Drac
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Jesus weep. What were his folks thinking? At least teach the poor bugger to say it properly.

It's Wha...King if that helps.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 5:50 pm
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bit judgey aren't you?! who are you to judge how people should pronounce their kdis names?


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 5:53 pm
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It's Wha...King if that helps.

How are the three full stops pronounced? Is it a sort of series of Khoisan clicks and pops?

EDIT or is this just a gratuitous case of swear filter avoidance? [hovers mouse over 'report post']


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 5:55 pm
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Is Simon your real name?
๐Ÿ™‚


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 5:57 pm
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Coming from Simon Semtex ๐Ÿ˜‰


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 5:58 pm
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Names are one thing. You can always change it. Just witnessed a mother in co-op chatting to the young woman on checkout about how she'd just had her 7yr old daughter's eyebrows tattooed on.

'Er wone ave to ave 'em dun again.

Girl on checkout - 'You had them tatooed?'

Mother - ' Yer - she looked like a f***** albino before she had them done '.

The woman on checkout responded with a pseudo-interested expression somewhere between a smile and a 'where am I?' panic. The 7 year old daughter looked unconcerned but her eyebrows looked like, well, not like eyebrows.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:00 pm
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Really though I agree, I know someone who called their child Tobias which to me sounds like a name for pitbull. Though I'm sure it's common somewhere.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:00 pm
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Tobias which to me sounds like a name for pitbull.

I wouldn't say that to a Pitbull's face.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:03 pm
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LOL love it!

A bit judgey? You don't know the half of it. Ever wondered why there was a teacher always hanging around your table during exam invigilation?

Google...Games bored teachers play to keep themselves amused... LOL


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:06 pm
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Your really think that Tobias sounds like the name of a Pitbull? Does this dog also have a monocle, perhaps a rapier? Sounds like an okay kids name to me. It gets bonus points for being a real name that's not John or Dave.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:09 pm
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Chavtastic names like Kenzie and Kade.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:11 pm
 Drac
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Google...Games bored teachers play to keep themselves amused... LOL

Well I know what one PE teacher out our school liked to play.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:13 pm
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Had this recently with one of my daughter's classmate who had a very [i]unusual[/i] spelling of a relatively common name (so unusual in fact that I won't risk repeating it here in case it is a googlewhack).

I apologised for misspelling it (i.e. correctly) on her birthday card and her mum responded [i]"Thanks ok, it's not a normal way to spell it in fact am sure she will be the only person in the world that spells it like that! We like to make life hard for her lol and made it up ha"[/i]

So I guess for some it is an attempt to signal that their child is a unique and special snowflake, completely unlike all the millions of other children their age.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:15 pm
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that's not John or Dave.

Thats the funny thing really. The OP is amused that someone has named their kid after a bloke in the movies and not done the more sensible thing of naming them after a transliterated version of ???????? or ??????.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:15 pm
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The 7 year old daughter looked [s]unconcerned[/s] but her eyebrows looked like, well, not like eyebrows.

The 7 year old daughter looked exactly the same as she had for the previous five minutes because her mother has allowed her to have a fixed expression permanently tattooed on her face. There are a lot of really, really stupid people around. Never underestimate just how many there are and how stupid they are.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:17 pm
 Drac
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To be fair it's not ????? fault he's judgemental.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:18 pm
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Posted : 09/05/2017 6:21 pm
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To be fair it's not ????? fault he's judgemental.

Or on such a short fuse.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:23 pm
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We had a nieghbour who's daughter was called 'Tiffany'.

Nice little girl, very sweet.

The she started wearing a necklace that spelt her name 'Typhanni'

We moved.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:25 pm
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Tie fanny, now that is a bad name. I honestly don't mind unusual names as long as they are real names and spelled correctly. Things like Tie fanny really boil my piss.

Then again, I'm not a big fan of standard names either. Every other man at work is Stuart, Matthew or Philip. There are loads of names out there yet the same shite gets used over and over.

Made up names, daft spellings or giving your child a pensioners name (Kenneth, Geoffrey, Arthur etc) should come with a punishment for the parents.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:33 pm
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"It's pronounced JOE A KIN."
It is in Spanish


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:36 pm
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giving your child a pensioners name (Kenneth, Geoffrey, Arthur etc)

Yeah but by the time they are old enough to care all the pensioners will be called Stuart, Matthew or Philip. ๐Ÿ˜€


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:37 pm
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True Graham, true ๐Ÿ˜€

I just can't imagine a child called Kenneth!

I know a couple with a baby called Arthur and he looks like Benjamin Button. That kid was born old.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:37 pm
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"Wha...King" I said.... only to be met with the entire class correcting me with a chorus of "It's pronounced JOE A KIN."

Has it occurred to you that this is a wind up? Is his other name pronounced "Owen-Ree"?


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:39 pm
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When we registered our child's name we followed after a little girl called ALLANFA DAN. You non welsh speakers may think that this is a nice welsh name but it actually translates into FIRE EXIT.

The parents were unsure of a name for their baby until they saw the sign in the hospital, hence naming her Fire Exit....


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:41 pm
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bit judgey aren't you?! who are you to judge how people should pronounce their kdis names?

If you think that's bad you don't want to know what he thinks of people that use the term 'judgey' :roll:. Maybe try Mumsnet if you want to use that type of language :wink:.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:43 pm
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The parents were unsure of a name for their baby until they saw the sign in the hospital, hence naming her Fire Exit....

Reminds me of a doctor friend who had to convince a new mother that "Placenta" was not "a nice name for a girl". ๐Ÿ˜†

When my missus was in for her second C-section (the nice calm elective one) the couple in before us were planning to call their daughter "Hunny B" ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

Note: thin hospital bed curtains are [i]not[/i] good at masking snorts or fits of the giggles.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:44 pm
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When we registered our child's name we followed after a little girl called ALLANFA DAN. You non welsh speakers may think that this is a nice welsh name but it actually translates into FIRE EXIT.

๐Ÿ˜† that is funny!

What's with calling offspring "Bear" ? ๐Ÿ˜ฏ What an utterly ridiculous name.

Edit: especially when you become an adult.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:49 pm
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I know a kid called Beech.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:53 pm
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What's with calling offspring "Bear" ?

It's that cad mr necessities sowing his wild oats


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:53 pm
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Naming a boy Sue.

You could write a song about that.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:55 pm
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I have a running bet with my BiL, we're waiting for the first Chlamydia or Alopecia to be spotted.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:55 pm
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Thor is pronounced Tor but I get what you mean


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:56 pm
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I know a kid called Beech

Maybe it's his mother's maiden name and he's simply a son of a beech


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:57 pm
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My two favourites from work are Reebok and Le-a. No not Leah, as the mum explained to me after I'd had a stab. Le dash a.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:57 pm
 Drac
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It is in Spanish

๐Ÿ˜†

Since when the Spanish pronounce J as a Juh sound?


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 6:59 pm
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What's with calling offspring "Bear" ?

As in Liam Payne And Cheryl's baby?

"Bear Payne" probably sounds like quite a good name when you are giving birth.

Personally I think they should have gone with "Window" or "Sham"


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 7:00 pm
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Or Cam or Max ๐Ÿ™‚


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 7:01 pm
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[i]My two favourites from work are Reebok and Le-a. No not Leah, as the mum explained to me after I'd had a stab. Le dash a.[/i]

I only clicked on this thread to tell my story of being told of a kid at someones school called Ledasha. I would have spelt it L-a . Same (poor) kid, surely?!


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 7:04 pm
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I always thought that 'Insertnamehere' (pronounced INS-URT-NAM-EHERE) is a lovely name for a girl. ๐Ÿ™„

Seriously though; it's not the kid's fault that the parents are wazzocks. I can testify that weird names aren't easy to live with, be they Chav or be they Posh.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 7:05 pm
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Seriously though; it's not the kid's fault that the parents are wazzocks. I can testify that weird names aren't easy to live with, be they Chav or be they Posh.

Is your real name Joaquin? Go on, you can confide in us


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 7:07 pm
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Overheard in Pilsworth ASDA about 15 years ago...

"CANTONAAAAR! GET 'ERE!"


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 7:09 pm
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Yeah... you're right.... Far too judgey for my own good...

Just checked out Mumsnet...

Apparently some daft bint wants to call her son "Penis Beaker."

What you think?


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 7:12 pm
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Smells a bit fishy to me.


 
Posted : 09/05/2017 7:17 pm
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