It could have been worse, it could have been my balls.

Thanks for taking one for the team.

Your balls have a bottom?? Is that your front bottom?

That will still be 'pleasant' compared to a Cleg bite on the end of your wee man. That was painful and lasted over a week!

Firstly, how do you cope not itching this in the office?

It's already itching. The word you're looking for is "scratching." HTH.

That will still be ‘pleasant’ compared to a Cleg bite on the end of your wee man.

Are you David Cameron?

No, definitely not...Horsefly for those closer to London...

I carry a little zapper for insect bites and stings. It delivers a tiny electric shock to the affected area. Perhaps you could improvise?

It’s already itching. The word you’re looking for is “scratching.”

I bet he says ‘You’re joking me’ as well! 🤨

Perhaps you could improvise?

Car battery?

hard luck. I know I shouldn't laugh but I just did.

What was dick barton’s wee man doing out in the fresh air for so long to get a clegg bite?
Makes you 🤔.

What was dick barton’s wee man doing out in the fresh air for so long to get a clegg bite?

Maybe it was snowy?

Mozzy bite on the ball sack eh?

Luxury. I got stung on the balls by a hornet whilst asleep in bed. That chuffing smarted I can tell ya!!

Needed a pee and stopped by a burn...pee lasted longer than expected and I wasn't paying attention to the flying insects...

Heat, believe it or not, kills the chemical that casues the itch and irritation. You can get a little plastic device like a mini battery powered car cigarette lighter that heats up about 1/4 circular area. Use that as soon as you get a bite and it won't bother you at all. A cloth with water as hit as you can stand it might be a reasonable substitute.

Your'e lucky in one respect.
It's only the females that bite, apparently. (I do not believe this to be true for one second)

I had a mozzie bite on my foreskin once when holidaying in France, must've been 12 or so. Didn't itch just hurt a lot. Had to spend many hours driving in a hot car pre aircon. Ended up discretely unzipping my fly and letting it cool down in the car.

It’s only the females that bite, apparently. (I do not believe this to be true for one second)

That's true. I think even they only bite when they are reproducing. Something to do the needed the blood for healthy eggs. The males use the little straw thing to get nectar from flowers. Iirc the make version isn't long or strong enough to peirce skin.

Yes and only some species bite.

Horse fly sound horrific.

i got pretty frantic looking for a tick tool once...

Could have been worse...

Could have been worse…

You'd really find out who your friends are when it comers to sucking the venom out.

I feel your pain/itch - I once had one on each ball...

It’s already itching. The word you’re looking for is “scratching.” HTH.

While correct, I wasn't thinking clearly at the time, I wanted to scratch an itch till it removed the skin from my body and stopped the itching!

Thanks Cougar 😉

Now, time for some more bite cream!

Having seen the intraweb I  know that there are people out there who would pay good money to be strung on the balls.

Sit back and think of the savings.

Sorry to provide a serious answer, but take an anti histamine tablet.
that will sort it

It doesn't help the OP but a few years ago on a lads' holiday we were sat around drinking beer outside the apartment when a mate suddenly jumped up and pulled his shorts down, screaming like he'd been shot. An ant had bitten him right on the tip off his knob LOL!