small domestic emergency
😆
In fairness, her house had been destroyed!
Was funny though. Proper tale of middle-class woe.
I'll have to use the Porsche to drive down to Monte Carlo now. What the hell are people going to think when I turn up in that old thing?
A Porsche? for Monte Carlo? You vulgar little man. Simply has to be the Aston, for MC. Or at least the Muira.
I'd not bother with the Bentley though; some of those streets are awfully narrow.
i just dropped a jar of St Dalfour jam on me foot.
A former employer of mine failed to make an appearance at an important meeting because the electric gates to his not-insubstantial Cheshire village home had jammed shut.
Oh, how we laughed.
I'm secretly gay.
(Thanks to the Fast Show for that one) 😀
Exactly when did white-sprouting broccoli become this year's brassica must-have???
Until I read that Martha Stewart ponce's recipe in the Observer Food Monthly, I thought purple was de rigeur.
What am I supposed to do now? Got people coming over TONIGHT and I've just splashed 22 quid down the farmers market on a brown bag full of the purple stuff from a s****ing horny-handed yokel, and now that bender's writing articles telling us its got to be WHITE not purple and doesn't even do us the courtesy of suggesting a wine to pair it with. Took me most of last week to track down a Gruner Veltliner that didn't have any English on the label.
FFS!
Surely being unable to decide which £2k push bike to buy is a rather middle class thing to do!
What pay rise do I give my cleaner was my predicament earlier in the week.
Decided, in the end, on 25% - she must be the highest paid cleaner in leafy SW London 😆
lunge - MemberSurely being unable to decide which £2k push bike to buy is a rather middle class thing to do!
Would a £2K bike cope with a trail centre though? I would never risk riding a budget bike at Llandegla.
i just dropped a jar of St Dalfour jam on me foot.
I did that once with a stereo I'd just nicked out of someone's motor.
SRAM XX or XTR?
back to the op
"Can't you just ask her to stand up for a moment while you retrieve it?"
Brilliant!
i used to work for a porsche garage.ocassionally things would filter down to us pondlife on the shop floor that made you sick.
people used to get unbeliveable things done purely because they were rich.
one of the best complaints i heard was whilst chatting to a down to earth guy who i didnt realise was loaded, he started to complain about what a pain it was trying to keep all the batteries charged up on his "collection" of supercars.....how about driving them was a tempting reply 👿
Nobby Nics or Racing Ralphs?
The fuel bills are costing us a fortune these days and with the shocking interest rates on my inheritance, it could well become a struggle soon.
So much for renewables. I'm going to donate the solar panels and wind turbines to the local organic lesbian co-operative and just rely on the Aga -It's tried and tested and they do just heat water so much better, don't they?
We're going to have to start using the Prius more often. It just never seems worth warming it up for a visit to the Unicorn when the Bentley is just there.
-It's a good job that we winter in the Cayman is all I can say.
My Howies order [i]still[/i] hasn't arrived.
Off to Old Trafford at the weekend, I do hope we win the Premiership.
mt - MemberOff to Old Trafford at the weekend, I do hope we win the Premiership.
Watch for the roadworks on the M25.
Surely being unable to decide which £2k push bike to buy is a rather middle class thing to do!
2k?!! Bless me. Things really must be tight
Friend runs a paint shop down here that does mainly sport/racing cars, sounds glam. but in reality it means he just has to eff about with stickers, and just gets through more Rosso than most spray shops...
Anyway, in a previous life he worked for the company that did a lot of work for Mclaren, a request came down to paint one of the prototype road cars they made back in the nineties in a really loud yellow. Apparently this guy had requested this colour, seen a mock up scale model, hadn't been satisfied, asked if he could see a full scale car painted up like it. Yep, say Mclaren but it'll cost you £15 grand. Apparently the bloke took one look at the finished car and ordered it in black....
But that's not the main reason I've never been tempted to go skiing: it's the people. The moment anyone tells me they're going skiing, I start to dislike them. This is because I've constructed my own imaginary version of a skiing holiday in my head: it involves a fistful of self-satisfied bastards called Dan and Izzy and Sam and Lucy sharing a chalet together, drinking wine while listening to Mark Ronson on Izzy's iPod speakers, taking 15,000 photos of each other guffawing and pulling silly faces, and occasionally venturing outside to slide down a hill on a pair of glorified planks, at which point with any luck they hurtle headlong into a tree, snapping at least three limbs in the process, and the holiday ends with them lying on their back, twitching like a half-crushed spider, exposed shards of shinbone gleaming in the winter sun as they scream for an air ambulance at the top of their idiot lungs.
I've a list of today's middle class quandaries right [url= http://www.singletrackworld.com/forum/ ]here[/url]
But that's not the main reason I've never been tempted to go skiing: it's the people. // snip // the holiday ends with them lying on their back, twitching like a half-crushed spider, exposed shards of shinbone gleaming in the winter sun as they scream for an air ambulance at the top of their idiot lungs.
these very same people live in fulham and have popped polo shirt collars under navy crew neck jumpers (if it's over 20° the jumper is over the shoulders and tied in a knot). these people are not a figment of the imagination they really exist.
i despise these pricks more than street urchins and dour northerners.
Charlie Brooker hit the nail on the head with that one
Good work on the Gruner Veltliner 2tyred. I know how hard that can be.
Where's the skiing rant from, I quite like that.
CHarlie Brooker wrote it.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2008/feb/25/smoking.charliebrooker
I've been ski-ing, and I'm proletariat council estate scum! 😀
I've also known people called Dan, Izzy, Sam and Lucy.
I touched Lucy's bottom once... 😳
've been ski-ing, and I'm proletariat council estate scum
Were you carrying the hamper for them?
>I've been ski-ing, and I'm proletariat council estate scum!
You DID go to a private school though 🙂
Does borstal count as a private school these days?
Well, not just [i]anyone[/i] can get in, you know...
come on ian monro, i don't have time to read messages that long, i'd be late for my daughters ballet class!
Ballet is soooo last year.
All the girls in Isabella's class are doing something called "street" dance now, and she's constantly complaining that she's excluded because we decided that she should learn the classics first.
Classic Street Dance?
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ahh that's better I've just got the satellite weblink back up on the yacht. Now what was the problem?
Thats true. Francesca has started doing the 'street' dance thing too. We've employed a couple of coloureds from the local council estate for her to 'hang' with so that she feels authentic. erm.... and ting
Thread death, eh? I think you might have taken it a UKIP too far there, you know.
binners - local council estate
how ghastly, we don't have a council estate close enough to qualify as "local" to our tree lined avenue!
