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Am I weird in that I've never even thought about sitting to pee?
Sounds like a good idea at night though.
The older I get, the more I sit!
Anybody else get into a plank position, knees on cistern, let it dangle? Make sure you're warmed up and loose before attempting.
Always give him a little wipe
Agreed.
No one wants the Spot of Shame
Am I weird in that I’ve never even thought about sitting to pee?
During my 50 years on this planet, Its never crossed my mind either.
Reading this thread, I don't think it's us that are the weird ones though 😀
Sitting's a comparatively new thing to me, used to be just to avoid putting the light on at night but over the last few years during daylight hours, free spirit that I am, I do whatever I feel like at the time.
Sit. But I see it has hinge training.
If you boy is anything like mine - if he sits in the morning he's likely to spray himself in the face. Testie level 1000.
Oh those were the days.
In my opinion the biggest mistake we made as a society is the flushing throne. If I've learned anything from years of camping its that we are adapted to squat to shit, stand (as men) to pee, and the two should be done separately, that way there's not really a need to flush away valuable resources to pollute the environment.
Stand. Unless I'm having a poo, then I'm already sitting and the thought of sitting - dropping a poo - stand up - wee - sit down - carry on with poo don't bear thinking about!
Since about 20 years ago, sitting.
Iake the weight of my feet, less chance of spray, no need to put light and hence fan on in the middle of the night, apparently (IANAD) better for long term urinary tract health....
I don’t think it’s us that are the weird ones though
The truly weird ones are the ones that put one hand on the wall, or both hands, or their forehead.
I have lost count of the number of drunk men I have seen, absolutely drenched after doing that in these toilets...
The Tunnel in Glasgow.
Those are sinks TJ, no wonder everyone’s getting in a pickle.
Usually a stander but the occasional sit down piss is a fundamental pillar of the art of workplace indolence.
Never even thought about sitting
Stand up - it’s in the Bible apparently... https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qo3o4nfiG7A
Sit obviously.
Standing is for slobs who never actually have to live with the consequences. (Ie Clean it up)
I was a stander that had never considered seated male peeing as a thing until my children arrived.
A number of thing happen when you have small children.
1. You're more tired and grateful for the chance to sit down.
2. Curious toddlers like to try and catch your flow - sitting excludes this kind of risk.
3. You spend a lot more time in the bathroom with small children - see point 1 and 2.
4. I was made redundant in the credit crunch and swapped roles with my wife so I took on the cleaning. Theres nothing like getting up close and personal to your own dried piss-splash residue to make you realise how unsavoury and wide spread it is.
5. Sitting to pee extends the quiet time I get in a busy house of active teenagers and a dog.
In a similar scat vein, I remember being astonished hearing Chris moyles and his similarly unfunny posse talking about arse wiping
Most of them wiped sat down, so they'd take a dump then tilt their arse to allow access and then wipe on the toilet. There was one guy who, like me, said this was extremely weird and stood up to wipe. He was regarded as a weird exhibitionist who probably walks around the house naked etc
WTF!!! I remember this blowing my mind at the time. Surely everyone stands up to wipe? What is up with people? Is it uniquely British to be ashamed of pooing or something?
Why TF would you stand to wipe? The bog seat spreads the cheeks fully so all tagnuts can be dislodged.
Why TF would you stand to wipe?
He's probably some kind of a weird exhibitionist who probably walks around the house naked
Standing to wipe is bizarre as above... The sideways lean lets you in for max wipage.
I'm blown away with this apparent consensus, apparently I live on the fringes of society then
And yes I sometimes do wander around naked, in the house, what of it? Does that make me Buffalo Bill?
As an eBiker I’m clearly inherently lazy so obviously I sit to pee. Conversely, I stand to wipe, possibly a hang over from being a proper biffer when I wouldn’t have been able to get my hand into position because of my ample rear.
am I the only one who finds it a bit creepy and american to use the male pronoun for referring to one's membrum virile?
Sitting to wipe? Mind blown! Do people really do that? All that leaning and cheek lifting and contorting, it's an ergonomic disaster.
Every day is a school day, but some days you learn stuff you wish you hadn't.
Sitting to wipe? Mind blown! Do people really do that? All that leaning and cheek lifting and contorting, it’s an ergonomic disaster.
Every day is a school day, but some days you learn stuff you wish you hadn’t.
I'm the same, my life can be divided into 2 parts: before this knowledge, after this knowledge
– need a wee while my 5yr old daughter is taking 35 mins to brush her teeth in the bathroom
Tell me you’re joking!!
He's probably exagerating slightly, nobody needs more than half an hour to brush their teeth.
Feel better now?
Always give him a little wipe, and the toilet seat afterwards just in case of splatter.
Never put your tools away wet
If I sat to pee, my cock would be dangling in the water
you should probably get a plumber round to rod the drains...
scotroutes
If I sat to pee, my cock would be dangling in the water
Ooh waters cold
Yeah ..deep as well😉
(Not used that one for a long time)
In 48 years I had never realised that men stood to wipe. I feel both disappointed my education/ facts of life chat missed this out and also disappointed that I never considered experimenting to check out the option myself. Changing hands was about as radical as I've gone so far. I will give it a go next time the turtle's head emerges and work out if it's for me or not.
I will give it a go next time the turtle’s head emerges and work out if it’s for me or not.
TBF I think even standing wipers do so after pooing rather than at the start
All we need is the secret incantation that makes every chod a magic poo. That way there's no wiping needed.
Or this:
http://viz.co.uk/2014/09/24/clag-gone/
Stand to wipe! WTF.
Maybe that explains some of the oddness I've noticed at the back of toilet seats at work. How the hell do you sit and wipe without getting your hand/wrist of forearm on the toilet seat?
I really like going al fresco, so liberating to squat and enjoy the view. In that instance I probably half squat to wipe 🙂
Sitters – if you unleash a powerful jet and you’ve not angled the dangle correctly, do you not occasionally get splashback through the gap between the seat and the loo?
Judging by the mess that the females of my house make through that tiny gap, I don't think it's just a male problem. It's genuinely puzzling how much splashback they get under the toilet seat, and by extrapolation, their arses*. And that means that I'm not solely responsible for any spray around the toilet base.
*Presumably the sitting males on this thread will cleanse their backsides carefully of this urine aerosol, and not just pull their trousers up and stride away?
Stand. Unless I’m having a poo,
Coward!
Living with ladies, I always sit to pee. They just don't need to hear all that peeing down the middle thing. The carpet thanks me and I can play Words with Friends without dropping the phone in the pan.
There's nowt as weird as (STW) folk.
longdog
Free Member
How the hell do you sit and wipe without getting your hand/wrist of forearm on the toilet seat?
Why are you fishing around for your bum hole? Mine's been in the same place for years
When your enemy awakes and finds you desecrating his shoes, better to have a standing start.
longdog
Free Member
How the hell do you sit and wipe without getting your hand/wrist of forearm on the toilet seat?Why are you fishing around for your bum hole? Mine’s been in the same place for years
Maybe my cheeks are bigger than yours?! There's only so much space between the toilet seat and yer bum to fit your hand in if sitting surely?
Another reason I stand to wipe is I need to inspect what I've just wiped, so I can see how much wiping is left. After 3 or 4 swipes the mark is fainter and then disappears so I know my work is done
I don't get how you sit down wipers can have any idea how to gauge the amount of wiping. It could be anywhere between 1 and say 6 swipes depending on the looseness of stool
But you sit downers will have no idea and this could lead to all kinds of social embarrassment and hygiene issues
****ing freaks
If you've ever stood at a urinal in a pair of cream linen trousers, you'd now sit by choice.
And shut the lid before you flush unless you like aerosolized E coli inhalation.
The carpet thanks me
Carpet in a bathroom? Jesus i can smell that from here.
Me:
SIT TO PEE at home or anywhere relatively civil/hygienic; stand otherwise.
It's a balance of hygiene thing: do I stand and mist myself in my own urine versus sit in someone else's.
SIT TO WIPE - absolutely. Why would anyone stand?? Cheeks are already parted and held at the ready by the seat. Why stand, let them smear together, and then try to wipe?
I'm also very much a reach-through-from-the-front wiper. I realise that reach-around-from-back is popular but my arse is much too large to leave enough space for that approach angle.