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OP, look on the bright side; at least your father of the bride speech will raise a few laughs.
Thought I would make a potato cannon ..humm
So following 'loosely' instructions off the internet. Parts were gathered , 1 x 5" plastic drain manifold with inspection cap. 1 x igniter from old gas fire, 3 foot of 2 1/2" pipe, glue and a few odds and sods and a spud cannon was born.
Twas an ugly construction but after the first injection of Lynx deodorant and subsequent ignition, the foot and half of flame that shot out the top and scorched the kitchen ceiling left us in awe.
A few experiments with wet bread was successful and left us chuckling. It was time to ram a spud down the pipe and gas her up ... oh the sound and sight, of a good size spud disappearing over the tree tops amazed even the Mrs.
All went well for a while distributing free spuds across the neighbourhood until I put 2 in the pipe:(
The back pressure blew the blanking plug from the bottom of the assembly clipping my left nut as it passed by. I managed to get back up after a while in the foetal position and gingerly inspect the damage. I am amazed at the size a mans ball can actually achieve after an impact. Fortunately no lasting damage done, but a lesson was learnt - don't pretend your firing spuds out ya knob - keep the cannon away from the body.
but a lesson was learnt - don't pretend your firing spuds out ya knob
Indeed, a mantra I've always lived by. 😛
OP it gets worse- 2yr old having a tantrum wearing wellies skirming and running on the spot. Que me 😳
Taekwon-do sparring roughly 3 years ago. Semi contact against a green belt (I'm a black belt so keeping it light hearted). I'm keeping him at bay by keeping a leg up, foot at chest height and occasionally clipping him atound the ear when he over ambitious. Right up to the point he swings his leg as hard as possible and smacks his foot right into my plums.
The next thing I remember is the instructor tellingly me to put the pain aside and carry on, only could I clear the sick up first...