Turkish, having just pulled the door off the caravan
'oh, no tommy, it's tip top'
And, to Tommy again. 'who you gonna shoot Tommy? Z' Germans?'
Thinking about it, any of the one liners in snatch, and anchorman!
What made you wanna be a policeman-officer?
Everybody and their mums is packin' around here!
You wanna be a big cop in a small town?
All Hot Fuzz - some of the better ones not repeatable here.
"you're about as much use as a cock flavoured lollipop"
He's not the messiah he's a very naughty boy! 😆
Anything from snatch +1 class film
The oft used phrase "Right wing think tank".
'What, with these feet?'
How about some more beans Mr Taggart
Excuse me while I whip this out
Mathew, Mark, Luke & Duck
Can I raise a practice question at this point? Are we doing Stonehenge?
Say what you like about the tenets of national socialism dude, at least it's an ethos
For your eyes only, 1981.
James Bond to an outrageously young Bibi:
"Now put your clothes back on, and I'll buy you an ice cream".
The Royle Family, Darren;
"It still smells of sh1t in here!"
'I'm not going to beat about the bush, but has someone been beating about your bush?'
Steady as a rock! But I shoot with this hand.....
All the best ones are from Flying High:
Ted Striker: Surely you can't be serious.
Rumack: I am serious... and don't call me Shirley!
Rumack: You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.
Elaine Dickinson: A hospital? What is it?
Rumack: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.
Ted Striker: and ever since then, I've had this terrible drinking problem (misses mouth with drink)
Have you ever shot two guns whilst flying through the air ?
Bad Boys 2 or Point Break? I meant which one first !
Alright so those guns are real but dogs can't look up !
good call on the feet Rusty
and a favourite from the Cohen Bros
'what do you care about money, you're ****in nihilists!'
Rusty Spanner - that line has me in stitches every time! Best TV comedy ever!
Another one of my favourites frhis one rom the film Fletch i"Why don't you two go to the gym and pump each other?"
Wyooooo nobody ****s with the Jesus man!
'You're fat and I'll throw you in the river. Now go away.'
"Stick around" - Dutch
"No way, you big spastic, you're a mentalist!"
Ha ha Jed Maxwell!
"Your ego's writing cheques your body can't cash"
" We're in some pretty deep s**t now man"
"That's not a knife. (pause) That's a knife."
"What's the matter Dillon? The CIA got you pushing too many pencils."
"Aim for the flat top."
"Only steers and queers come from Texas"
"I didn't know they stacked s**t that high."
"Got a match ?"
"Your breath and a buffalo fart"
1: "You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off"
2:"Badges? We don't need no stinking badges!"
Coronation street last week
Ooh I've spilt piccalilli on your bishop
Classic, I nearly pissed myself
Your mother ate my dog!
Not all of it!
Cracks me up every time 🙂
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"I'm Pickles, he's Onions"
"So, what first attracted you to the millionaire Paul Daniels?"
"We don't know you, but you look like you're about to do something stupid. I'm in. "
"flingers on bonce" Lawrence Harvey talking to a jap prisoner in the movie. The long and the short and the tall,
Yeah, but this one goes to eleven
and the new Mayor of London is ....
[img] http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTtgN5P_Mw74XaBhwnZWX2MnPXzs-AZyyIrPsdxhm_JY6QzLOZ7l7drVqg- [/img]
Red Dwarf:
Rimmer: Step up from blue alert to red alert.
Kryten: Are you absolutely sure, sir? It does mean changing the bulb...
"If theres no god why are there so many churches and who is jesus father?"
Also the whole scene in 40 year old virgin when he's sat with the guys he works with and they work out he's a vrigin...
ah the wonders of the net..
agree with the above, red dwarf has some true classics.
''your budgies head fell off?!''
''yeah. he was pretty old.''
you're all fart and no poo..
Rodents Of Unusual Size? I don't think they exist- Argh!
[i]Do these balloons blow up in to funny shapes?
No, not unless round is funny.[/i]
Raising Arazona
"f*ck you San Diego"
"Of course, San Diego is German for "whale's vagina"
or anything else from Anchorman 🙂
So many good ones there, This is one of my faves though from Dirty Harry. Not sure how long it will stay up but here goes . . .
[Harry Callahan has to explain why he shot a man]
Harry Callahan: Well, when an adult male is chasing a female with intent to commit rape, I shoot the b@st@rd. That's my policy.
The Mayor: Intent? How did you establish that?
Harry Callahan: [u]When a naked man is chasing a woman through an alley with a butcher's knife and a h@rd-on, I figure he isn't out collecting for the Red Cross![/u]
[walks out of the room]
The Mayor: He's got a point.
"[url=
I'm a Derek, and Dereks don't run.[/url]"
[of Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen]
"I'd have put money on him being one of them gays"
"No, he's not, but I bet he helps them out when they're busy."
"Ah-ha, missed both my legs"
Flaperon, I read the whole thread and then you went and posted it, you sod.
