[Closed] Finding your ideal girlfriend vs compromise

[i]if your ideal was: I fancy the @rse off her, she's my best friend, shared values, intelligent, sporty and has a good job, do you think they tick all 6 boxes or just some.[/i]

I'm not bothered about the 'good job' one. So yeah, from that ideal, I suppose I was willing to compromise.

My wife met my stringent criteria:

- girl
- pulse
- prepared to let me put my thing in her.

🙂

I have just, literally, spat coffee all over my screen.

My chap compromised on the fact that he didn't like or want children and I have two of them. Not sure how grateful to feel as I'm not sure how otherwise perfect he considers me... I get the feeling that being 'soiled goods' is quite a deal breaker with the chaps.

My german teacher (a wise man in some ways) said "in the end, everyone goes out with the least repulsive person who's prepared to go out with them".

I think this involves a degree of compromise.

Never had any women throwing themselves at me but found a good one in the end - perfection is in the mind not in reality!

Lol @ GrahamS.
After a certain age a female is going to be carrying some baggage. So there will have to be a compromise somewhere.
I personally feel that when you click with 'The One' all the list will go out of the window.
mr. b.h. hit my criteria = own teeth and hair.

Beauty, wealth and intelligence.

Pick two.

Intelligence is overrated.

Most girls are like guys- they act like dicks and can be needy. However some girls are sensitive and more importantly caring. They have a gentle and caring personality- those are the ones that are keepers.

I dont know how near or far I am from my gf's ideal to be honest. Never asked her. I imagine she'd like me to be a better cook and look similar to Brad Pitt but thats silliness.

OP you gotta be happy with yer partner - I suspect you will meet someone who is "good enough" and that's when you will learn what you are prepared to comprimise.

As for dating etc I think you need to have reasonably high standards but you have to allow it to be a bit random - it's all about chemistry.

GrahamS - Member

My wife met my stringent criteria:

- girl
- pulse
- prepared to let me put my thing in her.

You must make her feel so special 😉

Over 30 - single, mentally stable, attractive, pick any 2 from 3. 😀

There's no such thing as "ideal", it's just a romantic notion fuelled by chick-lit and lifestyle magazines. Ideal implies "I want no hassle", but ALL relationships involve "hassle" and "compromise".

Attractive, good personality, Loyal

Pick 2

mr. b.h. hit my criteria = own teeth and hair.

a play:

Bunnyhop: [grabs future Mr. BH by the forelock (to make sure it's real) and pulls his mouth open to check teeth] You're pulled!

curtains

I was very lucky, I found a 29 year old woman with very little baggage so I knocked her up quick.

Most girls who are great looking tend to have seen more action than a Vietnam Vet.

[i]I was very lucky, I found a 29 year old woman with very little baggage so I knocked her up quick. [/i]

Who said romance was dead?

Most girls who are great looking tend to have seen more action than a Vietnam Vet.

unlike [b]hora[/b] who has cobwebs down there and a bad smell...

cobwebs? Its got a sign across saying 'danger/condemned'

don't know about my ideal, but I really know what I don't want ( overweight, smoker, lazy,thick,etc...)

A bit of both. My Mrs is mostly my ideal woman but also a bit of a compromise. Still, 5 out of 6 ain't bad, in my book... Good enough to for me to want to marry her, anyway!
@ Blingbling: too true!

wife ticks all those boxes 'cept job !

a kept woman - LOL

of course, one should NEVER compromise (on anything) - just means no-one gets what they want 😉

just give in - it'll be your turn next ..

(is that "compromising" then, now that I think about it ?)

[i]I dont know how near or far I am from my gf's ideal to be honest. Never asked her. [/i]

This has to be the best policy. 🙂

Ideal would be a girl who isnt greedy with her fella'. Pity 🙄

BD- true though. It might wake her up/realise how long she has punched below her belt!

The french don't compromise.
Mrs Mugsy is French.
I must be perfect....

A true test of whether you are 'good' or not for your missus is her friends. If they are your friends- sorted. If they avoid you- then theres a prob. They think she has compromised.

There seems to be alot of pressure to find someone...anyone these days..

Where this pressure comes from i don't know, but alot of people appear to really want to be with someone, almost as an necessity.

From experience the more i want the less i get or the less suitable i get.

And the moment i stop wanting i find someone suitable..

Then i'm a **** and do something to lose her...usually i get to confident...

When i'm confident i become irresistible to the ladies..

I'm doomed!

Aye the fear of looking like you are left on the shelf when you could be really happy where you are right now.

[i]A true test of whether you are 'good' or not for your missus is her friends. [/i]

What if you aren't friends with your missus' friends because they are idiots?

I'm with the sad stockbroker character from "Notting Hill" -

"Must be great to get [i]anyone[/i] to go out with you, really..." 😥

What if you aren't friends with your missus' friends because they are idiots?

Know what you mean but I love my GF's friends. Quite fond of them and I can see why she likes them 🙂

What if you aren't friends with your missus' friends because they are idiots?

Well presumably your missus would have to be an idiot too then, no? And on that basis, if you married/are going out with an idiot, you must be an idiot too so you should then also get on with her friends since you have so much in common 😉

My GF is pretty, funny, intelligent, has a good sense of homour, isn't needy or possesive, but she does hang the toilet roll the wrong way round

I wonder what Fatsimons take/side is on our gf's?

Is he like Father Christmas, visiting the house calling out 'ho ho ho' when us menfolk are out?

>but she does hang the toilet roll the wrong way round

dealbreaker.

TBH dont compromise - it all ends up in tears..Im just packing my bags to come back to the UK after a year living in the US with my ex g/f. We ended up drifting apart because we were doing different things: out here I love the lifestyle, loads of sun, great riding, a real emphasis on outdoor living. My g/f on the other hand (& I loved her to bits, so much so I took her back once after she cheated on me) doesnt share my enthusiasm for those things. In London we had so many other things to share - museums, bars, eating out, shows etc..Here in San Francisco there isnt the same amount of variety. So we ended up going out less & less, she stayed in & became a bit of a suburban soccer mom & I turned into a bit of a bike bum. Now we have broken up & Ive lost a friend who I cared very deeply for..But still la la la plenty more fish in the sea etc etc etc..

Bottom line: dont compromise, its just not worth it.

There seems to be alot of pressure to find someone...anyone these days..

I would say it was more of a biological imperative. The sort of people who didn't try to pair up died out since we were fishes. Thankfully we have the choice to obey these instincts now, but the pull is always there...

[i]ie: if your ideal was: I fancy the @rse off her, she's my best friend, shared values, intelligent, sporty and has a good job, do you think they tick all 6 boxes or just some.[/i]

Yes,
yes,
yes,
yes,
Not really, but cycles to work, and occasionally with her mate on a Monday night
yes, we work together...

We've been together 20+ years, I can remember about 4, maybe 5 serious arguments in that time, we're not married, we have two children whom other people tell us are lovely (they must take after her) I consider myself very very lucky.

if they're fat and/or ugly i won't go there

likewise if they've never traveled (or want to) much beyond the UK

other than that, it's all good......

I met my ideal girl, but she didn't love me back.
My wife is my silver medal.

Nothing so funny as men talking about the women 'they' chose, or would choose.

I've worked with women for 20 years and you lot really haven't got a clue!

Let me put it simply; [u]it's not up to you.[/u]

I met my ideal girl, but she didn't love me back.
My wife is my silver medal.

Disagree. What made her your ideal girl? My ex was amazing looking and a killer-body. I dumped her. Now the male attention shes received turned her into a right nut-job.

I personally think my gf is perfect compared to that veneer.

Took me till i was 40 to meet my ideal partner, now wife, i knew as soon as i met her she was the one.

If you have to think about it, or you hesitate, she ain't the one.