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Cottaging
 

[Closed] Cottaging

 hora
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Oh stop trying to over-liberal yourselves ffs.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 12:07 pm
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have you never had sex outdoors hora?


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 12:09 pm
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When I was a lad we just called it sex. Not open water sex or wild sex.

I think I'm on the wrong thread.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 12:10 pm
 hora
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have you never had sex outdoors hora?

Everytime I ride my steed, its like making love to a fine woman Phil.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 12:13 pm
 hels
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Oops, we've upset her !

Actually, not sure I should admit this but it is true so what the hell. One of my cousins got caught cottaging, in a very conservative town in New Zealand. He went to prison. Ruined his life for a while, and my uncle didn't cope too well.

So yes, it does happen.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 12:13 pm
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If it wus women's wud u bin as bovvered?


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 12:31 pm
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Everytime I ride my steed, its like making love to a fine woman Phil.

sceptical cottage is sceptical

[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 12:36 pm
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Why hasn't anyone said 'pictures or it didn't happen' yet?


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 12:39 pm
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Everytime I ride my steed, its like making love to a fine woman Phil.

So you push your woman uphill then mince downhill on the chicken run?


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 12:54 pm
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@ philconsequence
"whats cottaging"
You stand in one of those old public toilets from the thirties waiting to meet like minded folk then you go in a cubicle and sit down on the loo while the other stand in front of you with his feet in a bag for life or similar , to other folk it looks like your having a crap with your shopping bag in front of you , if your lucky George Michael might come in and sing lets go outside followed by a very camp copper with a large truncheon and handcuffs-apparently 😛

Managers should never be gay its not british to stand in the woods in a nice suit and hide the salami in someones posterier- what would the board say about it at the AGM?


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 1:21 pm
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It's threads like this that make this forum so compelling and addictive.

Hora; are you for real, or a time traveller from the dark ages? I can't believe your total hypocrisy and homophobic attitudes.

You're providing great amusement though, so carryon!


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 1:25 pm
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Cottaging what an amusing term: it always makes me think of some quaint little craft activity, the sort of thing endorsed by the WI, rather like needlepoint, knitting or crocheting............

Ha ha! that's what I've always thought. That, or some unsavoury activity involving a wet lumpy type of cheese.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 1:27 pm
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the bag for life thing is GENIUS.

(i already knew what cottaging is, my parents explained it to me when i was about 6 years old when we drove past an infamous cottaging spot on the a35 and i asked to stop to go to the toilet lol)


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 1:28 pm
 DezB
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Where's DD? Cos I have the strangest...


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 1:54 pm
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It's threads like this that make this forum so compelling and addictive.

+1


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 2:04 pm
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Where's DD? Cos I have the strangest...

I iz watchin u tru yr webcamz.

*lickz lipz*


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 2:07 pm
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feet in a bag for life

I thought the point was you left the Mrs at home... thank you I'm here all week.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 2:09 pm
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Hello dear,fancy popping round for some cottaging ,a cup of tea and a slice of cake?

You off cottaging with Wurzel Gummage?


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 2:16 pm
 DezB
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[i]the bag for life thing is GENIUS.[/i]

So your ahem, [i]friend[/i] stands in a bag... just in case some, like, right ol' PERVERT should happen to peek under the door eh? 😯


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 2:38 pm
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or some unsavoury activity involving a wet lumpy type of cheese

Well I guess that depends on the personal hygiene of those involved


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 2:46 pm
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[i]So your ahem, friend stands in a bag... just in case some, like, right ol' PERVERT should happen to peek under the door eh?[/i]

although it must look like you've got a couple of ferrets in a sack in there with you at, errm, critical moments.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 2:48 pm
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Certainly some experts on the dogging/cottaging scene here....


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 3:33 pm
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I thought cottaging was like a pub crawl just, visiting random folk's cottages to go to the loo.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 5:34 pm
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I thought cottaging involved a public toilet.

In Canada it involves going to a cottage, for the weekend, sometimes with family or friends.
They get really upset if you come prepared for proper cottaging...

I've always thought it was pretty grim and the Police should be more involved/attend more.

They probably do. Not in uniform though, the stains are a b*gger to wash out.

You are right I far prefer men to brag on the internet about their sexual conquests, keeping knickers as mementos and telling us all about their beautiful penis

er... is there some third forum on stw that we don't know about?


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 6:41 pm
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they are all claims made by Hora in the last few weeks on various threads on here.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 6:47 pm
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Well I'm with hora on this one. Next time it could be a child's face. Or an otter. Or a swan - possibly a fundamentalist bi-curious Islamic one. Jesus, we're all doomed. I'm just going to stop in and watch midsummer murders. I blame elfin, to be honest 😕


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 6:55 pm
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Now, I'm fairly liberated - and I don't see much wrong with people enjoying a bit of cruising at the right place and at the right time...

However I really can't understand people getting into [url= http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2012/aug/08/boris-johnson-aide-extreme-pornography-cleared ]this![/url]


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 7:01 pm
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Not as wierd as being a tory 😀


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 7:09 pm
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In Canada it involves going to a cottage, for the weekend, sometimes with family or friends.
They get really upset if you come prepared for proper cottaging...

I'm curious as to how one would arrive 'prepared for cottaging'. From what little I know of the practice, it doesn't require much in the way of equipment. Do you bring a ready-to-assemble portaloo or something?


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 7:11 pm
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carrier bags on your feet, did you not read the thread?


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 7:20 pm
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Too right Hora, all those gayers should be well ashmed of themselves, right?

Emz - Heterosexuals like a bit of public fun as well, you heterophobe!

Or can gay people only have sex in public or something?

On another topic dressing up as balaclava clad IRA kidnappers and terrorizing doggers can be hilarious.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 7:25 pm
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carrier bags on your feet, did you not read the thread?

Chaps, no jeans and cowboy boots help too.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 7:30 pm
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I'm curious as to how one would arrive 'prepared for cottaging'

Wang out, mainly. Or wang out and smacking your lips


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 7:38 pm
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This has got to be the funniest thread for a long time.

as for the bag for life on your feet, its probably all to do with safe sex and wearing protection, there could be fluids on the floor, that could damage the soles of your shoes.

Also bags for life when worn out are replaced free of charge.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 7:55 pm
 joat
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I can't bring myself to read all of this thread. I thought it might have been a discussion about self catering holidays 😳


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 8:51 pm
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joat, don't knock it 'til you try it.


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 8:53 pm
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[img] [/img]

calm down

its

just

cottage cheese


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 9:11 pm
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Now, my memory is usually pretty good and I may be completely wrong, but im gonna run with it...is this the same Hora who once mentioned a threesome with 2 chicks in a car, in broad day light?


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 10:21 pm
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In Canada it involves going to a cottage, for the weekend, sometimes with family or friends.
They get really upset if you come prepared for proper cottaging...

Canadians also have "[i]double fisting[/i]" and "[i]f cking the dog[/i]" as well though 😯


 
Posted : 09/08/2012 11:10 pm
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Canadians also have "double fisting" and "f cking the dog" as well though

And look baffled when you shout "look at me ma, I'm double-fisting!", in a kind of 'yeah, we do it all the time, so what?' way


 
Posted : 10/08/2012 5:05 pm
 Spin
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This thread is hilarious.

Seems like Hora is taking a pasting (pun intended) because he thinks having sex in the bushes in a public park is perhaps not entirely acceptable.


 
Posted : 10/08/2012 5:15 pm
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I'm with Hora on this one. I'm all for folk enjoying a bit of fun in the outdoors if they want but only if thye're discrete and a long way from other people. I'm far from a prude but they don't half make you feel uncomfortable. I've had issues with them on a few of occasions, including turning up at my local beach, going kitesurfing then coming back and having to drive home in my wetsuit because the locals were driving up and looking through my car windows (and not just glancing, properly staring with their bits out) while I got changed. I thought there were rules about flashes of lights to get people to come over etc, doesn't seem to apply anyway!. And the same as the OP - local trail-head car park getting over-run by folk wanting to get their end away so much so that local older folk no longer want to go for a quiet walk in the evening in their local beauty spot.

As with cars and bikes on the road, people should live their lives in a way that causes the least impact on others possible. Having a ham shank in the public car park and approaching strangers cars at the beach to see if you can masturbate over their window is NOT minimal impact.


 
Posted : 10/08/2012 5:28 pm
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On another topic dressing up as balaclava clad IRA kidnappers and terrorizing doggers can be hilarious.

try night riding on the chase through the dogger carparks wearing one on these [img] [/img]

it's ever so funny


 
Posted : 10/08/2012 5:30 pm
 hels
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I'm not buying the kite-surfing excuse - we know why you had the wetsuit on...


 
Posted : 10/08/2012 5:30 pm
 hels
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I'm not buying the kite-surfing excuse - we know why you had the wetsuit on...


 
Posted : 10/08/2012 5:30 pm
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