Having a ticket to see Nirvana and blowing it out because i'd already been out that week, was a bit tired and knew they were due to tour again a few months later. 17 year old me was dick.
All sorts of regrets re - not taking opportunities to travel, not taking chances with work/career that would have been good.
As i'm sure is the same with everyone else, i've got a few regrets with girls & relationships as well, but it is what it is..
All the old men on here still thinking about the fit girl who they didn’t get to sleep with 20+ years ago. ha ha ha
30 years ago, but yeah of course 😀
All the old men on here still thinking about the fit girl who they didn’t get to sleep with 20+ years ago. ha ha ha
Or regretting the ones they did 😎
As for the OP,
It's a difficult question. There are moments in my life which were literally life-changing.
Going to university, for instance. Not because of the degree I failed to get but because of the people I met whilst I was there. My first ever girlfriend was a friend from Uni and some of my best friends today I originally met there. At Uni I discovered the Mono bulletin board (which is still going to this day) and that was responsible for two other girlfriends, one of whom eventually became my wife.
My current partner, I (re)met at a school reunion a few years ago. Had I gone to a different school, or not attended the reunion (and I very nearly didn't, I doubt there would be many who would miss me based on the painfully shy dork they'd remember as from school), I wouldn't have my current partner, this house, the cats.
Obviously, some of these are big life choices. I'd like to think that if I'd gone to a different Uni, or not gone to one at all, I'd still have had friends and girlfriends but... totally different ones. That's weird, isn't it?
But others are a butterfly effect. I live where I do today directly as a result of sitting outside a pub chatting to an incredibly hot woman I once knew in passing some 30 years ago whilst waiting for a taxi. If I'd ordered it ten minutes earlier...? Now, that's really weird.
So, regrets? I can't really regret stuff like that. If I'd made different choices my life could be wildly different, but who's to say whether that would be better or worse? If I'd bought that house with my first girlfriend rather than balking at £35k or whatever silly price it was, I could be in somewhere worth three quarters of a million today... or I could be homeless.
I regret getting married, I suppose. The wedding was genuinely one of the best days of my life, not least because I took it as a personal challenge to subvert it as much as possible. Wedding guests had secret missions. In my vows I promised that I was never going to give her up, never going to let her down, and was inaudible for the next line as the entire room including the registrar had lost it. But. It was ten grand on a credit card that I was still paying for when she ****ed off two years later. Today it's just something else on my long list of "things I really must sort out at some point."
There's probably plenty of other things. I regret not leaving an abusive relationship far earlier than I did but, well, that's abusive relationships for you. I regret spending a ton of money on stuff which ultimately proved to be worthless. Three VHS cassettes for a tenner at HMV? I'm building up a media library like my dad did with records and hey, this one is "limited edition," it'll be worth a fortune one day! I regret spending a ton of money on stuff to make other people happy, a big daft tent that my then-partner wanted? Cost north of 500 quid, used twice, anyone want to buy a tent? I regret not making more of an effort to spend time with friends because they "moved away," they're really not that far. I regret not taking a job working as a fixer on the Commonwealth Games when I was contracting, because I'd already agreed to a different assignment who ultimately ripped me off quite badly.
I guess where I'm going with this is, no-one lies on their death bed going "man, I wish I'd done less stuff." Regrets are for things that you didn't do.
I would have liked to do a different degree. Archaeology instead of Art.
All the old men on here still thinking about the fit girl who they didn’t get to sleep with 20+ years ago. ha ha ha
its not the fit girls, its the opposite: i was far too picky !!!
In case no one has said it yet - Louise
Friend of mine who worked on the Beano at DC Thompson came to me around the turn of century and said he’d been offered a job at a start up, share plan etc! Told him not to be so stupid, no one would ever play games on a cell phone and he’d waste his animation talents. Each time a game developer passes us in a McLaren in Dundee i cringe .
Not a regret as such, but.... I got the A-Level grades to do my first choice subject, which whilst I enjoyed, and subsequently made a related career out of, my back up choice was to do Business Studies at Manchester Poly (as it was then). Given Idid an MBA later in my career and have ended up in business consultancy, I often wonder how it would have panned out if I'd flunked my A-Levels and taken the Business Studies course from day 1 🤷♂️
All the old men on here still thinking about the fit girl who they didn’t get to sleep with 20+ years ago. ha ha ha
Mine was down to my own crapness rather than 'getting' or not getting anything.
Hooked up with a friend of a friend one night, mostly due to said friend going "you should go chat him up, he's lovely" rather than any of my own Byronesque skills. I know these stories always get embellished but she was "holy shit" levels of stunning, a wet dream writ large. I'd describe her but I'm sure every reader (who likes the ladies) can work out what a fit woman looks like, and you likely wouldn't believe me anyway.
So, eventually I ended up back in her dorm with her and...
... and I didn't know what to do next. Not a clue. How on earth do you convert from "nice weather we're having for the time of year" to "get your pants off and sit on my face"? So we chatted about her visit to Cadbury World or something equally vacuous until eventually she got bored and kicked me out.
That's one I really regret. If I were to relive that evening with a more experienced brain I'd have left her walking like someone had just stolen her horse. To add insult to injury, that same night another mate hooked up with her rather plain-looking friend and she turned out to be a raging nymphomaniac who left him red raw (or at least, so he claims).
1 Could have bought bitcoin when it was in the "10000 btc for a pizza" stage
2 Could have bought apple stock in the very early 90s
Or regretting the ones they did 😎
I was going to say I don't regret any, even the ones who were... shall we say, "not the best." But there was one who went on an Internet smear campaign after I declined her request to go back for seconds. That was a mistake and I kinda knew it going in (so to speak).
its not the fit girls, its the opposite: i was far too picky !!!
Same. Back at high school I was obsessed with a couple of girls to the exclusion of all others. That was probably a mistake as well. One lass once offered to let me finger her and I said "no thanks." You can put that one on the list as well.
I spent years regretting not going further with someone I’d kissed twenty years ago, and then she found me on a dating app.
Long story short we went on a few dates, and I soon remembered why things hadn’t progressed in the past. Nice woman, quite beautiful still, but not right for me.
Moral of the story is that things generally happened for a reason, the past is behind us, and we don’t remember things as well as we’d like to think that we do.
I actually regret asking a girl out!!
I was 13 and it took me months to pluck up the courage to ask 'Katie' out - boom, flat refusal with a laugh added in!! 😬😬
Proper knocked my confidence a set me back 5 years.
I wish I'd smoked more weed when I was young. I was always nervous about employers getting a bad impression, but now that I'm older and deal with young people, I realize that if you just show up before noon, nobody cares.
Also, when I was a student I did a lot of day=jobbing, often for moving companies. One job involved moving a bunch of old TV props between warehouses, which turned out to be the Play School stuff. On the lunch break, we busted out the dolls and put on a little porno show with Big Ted giving Poppy and Jemima a bit of action through the back door. Oh, I wish there were camera phones back then. I was tempted to try some souveniring and taking one of the dolls home, but was too chicken, assuming (wrongly) that they would check us on the way out for stolen goods.
All the old men on here still thinking about the fit girl who they didn’t get to sleep with 20+ years ago. ha ha ha
The reason for me, is that overall all my decisions worked out well. Not perhaps at the time but allowed other doors to open.
I had an interesting and varied career, which was quite well paid.
The route it took me down, has me living in an area I always wanted to be, in a comfortable house, with a couple of low stress businesses, I work with the Mrs.
Not had too many regrets but buying my first house on my own, in middle age is a little bit of pain and having to live somewhere cheaper than my home town. But I did work abroad for a long time so mortgage is small.
Also that Mini 1275 i bought as a 20 year old which was a bigger money pit than HS2, nice exhaust though.
I often wonder how it would have panned out if I’d flunked my A-Levels and taken the Business Studies course from day 1
I did a Business Studies degree (with a bit of IT stuff thrown in too). It has been of absolutely no use in 30 years of work in the world of 'business'.
Buying a property as soon as I finished my apprenticeship in print. I was 20 years old and earning basically a fortune. Fast forward a year or two and interest rates hit 15%, was stuck in negative equity for a decade. I'm not so worried about friends who got on the ladder after me buying 3 bed semis for what I'd paid for my pokey Barratt homes flat, just that I'd wasted what should have been a fairly carefree time on worrying about paying the mortgage. Then resented being stuck in a flat I'd quickly outgrown. The general shitness of the situation put paid to at least two relationships, both of which definitely go into the regrets column.
allowed other doors to open.
Jemima, is that you?
@morecashthandash glad someone did, read through 2 1/2 pages and thought this place was slacking.
Imagine having the wisdom of the years at a time when it would have made a difference in so many ways!
Can you have the wisdom without the knowledge though, I quite often think about time travel, but then knowing me I'd be straight down the cop shop trying to not only remember the names of all the wronguns that need putting away but also trying to tell them in a way that plod could be persuaded to do something about it...
Regret selling some cars that are now classics! Scooby Impreza P1 205Gti (also a 309Gti ) now rare! Not life changing but regrets!
I wished I never listened to music so loud and with headphones on when I was younger....and then becoming a rave/house Dj in the 90s ...( even tho it came so natural to me)...because my ears are proper gone now.
I suppose my other regret is to not taking up a mechanic apprenticeship when I was offered after doing a weeks work experience in my last year of school....because I wanted to be a builder instead.
I always like to think things happen for a reason...so far my life has worked out better than most.
Every cloud !!
Taking 48 years to realize I'm not exactly normal 😂
Still don't believe it. This is normal right?
also a 309Gti
I wanted a 309 GTi for ages. Something like 130BHp and the insurance was silly cheap.
Zigging when I should have zagged.
The guys missing out on Nirvana. Ouch.
I went to Uni in Manchester and regret not going to more gigs in early 2000.
I'm a huge Beatles fan and not a month ago ducked out of the longer tour of Abbey Road studios after watching and being in a recording session in there for two hours to go and meet a mate for a pint in Shoreditch.
The photos from the other later were a Beatles wet dream.
I did have a nice pint though.
Could have done with being a bit more driven/motivated throughout my career but that’s not so much a regret over (in)action as hoping for a personality transplant. But then I’m just saying I wish I wasn’t me, which seems silly. Things have worked out well enough overall.
I’m a huge Beatles fan and not a month ago ducked out of the longer tour of Abbey Road studios after watching and being in a recording session in there for two hours to go and meet a mate for a pint in Shoreditch.
I spent my 18th Birthday there. They had the exhibition on to commemorate the 20th anniversary of the recording of Love Me Do. It's now 60 years since it was recorded and 40 years since I was there!
As for regrets in life none that I can think of that have lasted. There have been times I'd wished I'd done things differently for a while but Im very happy with how things have turned out.
I've said to other people before that I'm very happy with where I am but I didn't always enjoy getting here
I’m very happy with where I am but I didn’t always enjoy getting here
That's a great quote, and one that absolutely resonates!
The guys missing out on Nirvana. Ouch.
Me and some friends had Nirvana tickets at Manchester GMEX... but Kurt overdosed in Italy, I think? essentially cancelling the tour and before the tour could resume, well we all know how that ended up..
So not a regret from a personal point of view, but it could have been one of the best gigs ever...
Allowing drink and drugs to go from fun to a problem in my late teens/early twenties. Not tackling the reasons for those until a few years back (52 now).
Still - live and learn, I wouldn't be where I am now if it wasn't for all the good, and bad, choices I made along the way.
Mine is in the present. It's knowing I'll regret inaction or actions I'm making now - being aware my behaviour will be regretted and doing absolutely nothing about it.
Example. I don't have great relationships with my parents. I could try harder to make them better but it's not all on me. I often think it would be easier just to live life after they pass, regretting not trying more, and hating that I didn't, rather than try now.
Mine is in the present. It’s knowing I’ll regret inaction or actions I’m making now – being aware my behaviour will be regretted and doing absolutely nothing about it.
Example. I don’t have great relationships with my parents. I could try harder to make them better but it’s not all on me. I often think it would be easier just to live life after they pass, regretting not trying more, and hating that I didn’t, rather than try now.
That's a tough one, my relationship with my dad detieriorated towards the end, but he was one of those that wouldn't listen, always saw me as a child so we couldn't converse as equals, many arguments.
It's really not an easy thing to know what to do.
I don't have regrets in that sense as I really tried as best I could, and I think deep down, he knew it too, but he was so set in his ways and not eating, unless you class a glass of brandy as breakfast. I'll always love him and be sad I couldn't reach him, maybe I should have been more forcefull? I doubt it, I was about as forcefull as I could be without being physically forcefull.
Biggest regret was to listen to wrong advice then naively followed it through, then being blamed and suffered for it.
A very hard lesson learned the very hard way.
Then one day I noticed that, unlike in the movies villains do not always have a mustache.
Regrets are for things that you didn’t do.
This... 1000x times this... Well, maybe not so much if your name is Lucy Letby, but for those of us that haven't knowingly killed anyone...
Having had cancer in the last 12 months (I'm ok, in remission, they managed to remove it with an op and it shows no signs of coming back), I have had plenty of time to pontificate on "regrets" or otherwise...
A year ago I'd have been telling you about the nice cars I owned, then sold at the bottom of the market, or the ones I nearly owned (E30 M3!) but chickened out of despite them being at the bottom of the market when I was ready to buy! None of that really matters... Material things come and go. They're nice whilst you have them, but they certainly don't define life.
5yrs ago I''d have told you about the tickets to see Prince @ the O2 that I gave away to my best mate and his then GF (now wife), which ended up being front row (I got given them myself by someone else that couldn't go), I didn't go cos I was too embarrassed to go on my own and I couldn't get a potential suitor to go! I was that shit with women until I got into my mid 30's that I couldn't even get a date even giving a ticket to see Prince away! 😂 But now... Well it was an incredible life changing experience for my best mate and his wife, they had such an incredible time and it left them with a life long memory of an incredible experience, so I am happy for them... Despite the evening I sat in my car for hours, trying to go home, listening to Annie Mac's tribute to Prince the day he died!
10yrs ago I'd have told you about all the debt I racked up in my early 20's crippling me financially until I was in my mid 30's... But all the lessons I learned from that have been applied, and these days I am a veritable Martin Lewis compared to my wasteful peers. That's not to say I don't spend money and enjoy things, absolutely the contrary... I just understand the difference between what is important and what isn't, and how to prioritise financially. These days I'm in a far better position than most of my peers financially, even many who earn more than I do, because I learnt those lessons the hard way and won't make those mistakes again... Money doesn't make you happy, but a lack of enough money to pay for the necessities will guarantee unhappiness. It's amazing that all it takes is to learn the game, play their system, and how many doors a consistent 999 credit rating can open to you...
But none of that really matters. It's all just life experience.
I guess the only possible thing I do regret (that I have done, rather than haven't done) is always having wanted to see the best in my Dad for the last 25-30yrs... The bloke has severe narcissistic personality disorder, at least when it comes to me anyway. He mostly isn't like it with other people, but with his own son... Everything is all about him, and his own self importance, and far be it ever for me to criticise any of his (mostly bad!) decisions... I'm 43, very financially independent, in a good stable relationship with an incredible GF, and yet my Dad still calls me "his little boy" (in a derogatory manner, not an endearing one) and always seizes any opportunity for me to have to rely on him for anything he possibly can, so he can then use it against me... Life was so much easier for the few years we didn't speak at all, even if I was broke at the time! Anyway... Everyone always says they regret not having spent more time with their parents when they die... That's one thing I can guarantee you I won't regret when my Dad croaks! Not that I wish him ill... But when he goes, he will simplify my life fairly significantly again.
That’s a tough one, my relationship with my dad detieriorated towards the end, but he was one of those that wouldn’t listen, always saw me as a child so we couldn’t converse as equals, many arguments.
See above... 😔
<p style="text-align: left;">Deciding to consciously fluff an entrance exam to RGS in Newcastle. 11yrs old, put forward by my Junior school head. Deliberately fluffed it on my best subject, English language. A raging inferiority complex, because I knew my parents couldn't afford it. Doing the same thing over a place at Baliol College at 15, 'cos, yep, see above. Then, after 6wks at HMS Gosport and being accepted for a RN training bursary...knocked it back because I'd fallen head over for a lass back at home. Got engaged and messed that up too after 3yrs. After 21, all good I suppose; but I often wonder what if.</p>
Being born. Dunno why im here at all really.
The guys missing out on Nirvana. Ouch.
Me and some friends had Nirvana tickets at Manchester GMEX… but Kurt overdosed in Italy, I think? essentially cancelling the tour and before the tour could resume, well we all know how that ended up..
yep - another one here - had tickets, he tried (unsuccessfully) to commit suicide, got tickets for the rearranged gig, he then did commit suicide so we got our tickets refunded. If I’d kept hold of that ticket it would be worth a few hundred quid. Ahh well.
