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You complain to the BBC...
The print in mountain bike magazines seems much smaller than it used to be...
You bend down to tie your shoelaces, and wonder what else you can do whilst you're down there.
The music you grew up with is now on a Readers' Digest compilation..
You go "Tch!" every time you see someone under 25 enjoying themselves...
My son is 15 at the beginning of next week.
that's 15 years of my life that appear to have whizzed past whilst my attention was distracted
You have to grunt when you crouch to pick something up whether it be a child or a newspaper.
...when your children earn more than you do ๐
All your children are retired - thats what my Gran used to say
People handing out flyers for club nights don't try to put one in your hand.
You occasionally agree with the Daily Mail headline.
When it takes weeks to patch up from yer latest tippy tumble.
Subscribed to 'Homebuilding & Renovating' magazine
You have to grunt when you crouch to pick something up whether it be a child or a newspaper.
๐
One of my daughters now grunts when she bends over or lifts anything heavy - I can't imagine where she got it from ๐
When your girlfriend is becoming slightly embarrassed of you going to the park on your BMX to practice 'stunts'...
... when your girlfriend is 10 years younger than you.
It's when ... erm ... no it's gone
the attractive females you [i]may[/i] be looking at are looking back..... at your son sitting beside you..
You never skip a chance for a wee and never waste an erection.
Your birthday weekend was a nice meal with the other half and a few beers in the local with your dad.
When car fuel econamy is not concidered a boring topic of conversation.
18yr old girls look too young nowadays. ๐
.......... when you look at the ads for the Acme surplus hair removing device and think Hhmmm..?
the next 18 yr old you kiss will be your grandaughter..
I'm not old. Ner.
when celebrities are waste of space ...
When every time you walk into a room, you think "now what did I come in here for?"
When people stop saying 'you look like a dirty old man' (wearing something/glasses/hat etc).
I guess you look like a dirty old man....all of the time. Oops.
You don't recognise the face staring back at you in the mirror.
You think that every single band member interviewed on Six Music sounds like a monosylabic ****-wit, and you want to slap them and tell them to stop mumbling and speak properly ๐
Your scalp inverts and your hair starts growing down & out through your ears, nose and eyebrows.
Your idea of a really good weekend is tidying up the garage.
You stay up late surfing pictures of sheds.
you cant trust a fart. ๐
when you buy cd's from service stations
When "aids for independent living" catalogues start appearing in your junk mail...
.... you get scared just reading about doing [url= http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/nearly-cracked-50mph-today ]50mph on a push bike[/url]. Then very interested in the ensuing discussion on aerodynamics and the workings of Galileo.
white hair in eyebrows... ๐
start to ache alot more in the mornings ๐
you have to start going for a pee at 4am ๐
hangover lasts a week not a day ๐
the young guys in work have never heard of stone roses (fill any pre year 200 band here)
wetting myself at...
you cant trust a fart.
i always have to stop and think now!
When you no longer look at bike catalogues...
+++ for birky's observation. So true. (funny how it seems, oops there I go).
Your back goes out more than you do.
There's nothing left to learn the hard way.
You come to the conclusion that your worst enemy is gravity.
You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
You are proud of your lawn mower.
You can't remember the last time you laid on the floor to watch television.
You have more patience; but actually, it's just that you don't care any more.
Younger men ask you for advice.
You [b]do[/b] recognise the face staring back at you in the mirror - but it's your mother/father, not [b]you[/b]
When you hear new colleagues talking about the original Playstation being retro gaming, and have never used either an audio or video cassette. ๐
when buildings you saw going up are being knocked down
My hangovers seem to last till at least Tuesday ๐
When the bouncer stops you going in to a nightclub and you say 'thank you, my feet are killing me'
When someone asks how old you are and you have to pause and think because you can't remember.
When someone asks how old you are and you have to pause and think because you can't remember.
I need to remember what my acting age is compared to my real age. Pook caught me out.
Dammit.
Last week, I had to explain to someone what a laserdisc was.
(Then got asked the priceless, "what do you play those on, then?" A god damned VCR, genius.)
I still call films 'videos'!