Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 49 total)
  • Porno snow ride (Norber)
  • simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    men: imagine thrusting your rubbery firmness into yielding virgin softness
    women: imagine BEING that responsive softness (I shall not pretend you are all virgins 🙂

    this was how the snow felt last night – blissfully sensual, smooth gliding contact, driving me to endless obscene metaphor. This was the RIGHT kind of snow – snow to die for :o)

    pics later…

    Stoner
    Free Member

    you really arent getting enough are you simon?

    For all our sakes, just knock one out in the bogs at work or something would you! 🙂

    nickegg
    Free Member

    WTF

    Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middling Edition

    Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middlin...
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    ski
    Free Member

    Lol – Words fail me Simon 😉

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    just knock one out in the bogs at work or something would you!

    that doesn’t work, my libido is irrepressible 🙂

    mudshark
    Free Member

    Try humping a snow woman; it ain’t all that great….

    Stoner
    Free Member

    Try humping a snow woman; it ain’t all that great….

    Yeah. I gather they can be really frigid.

    badumtish

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    Try humping a snow woman

    this is all metaphor – the blissful sensuality of the snow powerfully brought to mind the sensuality of sex, though one is cold and powdery and the other warm and wet :o)

    piedidiformaggio
    Free Member

    …and women go out for group rides with you?

    Are they mad?

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    …and women go out for group rides with you?

    perhaps it was just as well there were none out last night, as they might have been offended by my flights of fancy

    0303062650
    Free Member

    SFB: After some googling, you need putting in this and putting away for a few years, honestly man!!! 😉 (this probably isn’t safe for work, so don’t click if you’re anywhere other than home, without anyone seeing your screen) http://www.vlatex.com/cm006.html

    😉

    jt

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    you need putting in this and putting away for a few years, honestly man!!!

    well, I’m at work, so I can’t look, but my metaphoric raptures are surely harmless ? Just because I’m excited by sensuality doesn’t mean I don’t treat women with respect.

    devs
    Free Member

    Good Morning, Vietnam (1987) – Memorable quotes
    Adrian Cronauer: You are in more dire need of a bl*wj*b than any white man in history. …

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    You are in more dire need of a bl*wj*b than any white man in history. …

    it’s not a matter of need but desire, but the effect of any ‘relief’ is strictly temporary :o)

    TimP
    Free Member

    Price
    $350 Australian Dollars (est. $244 US)

    Product Code: cm006
    Bondage Rating: 5/5 A bondage rating of 0 means no restriction at all, graduating up to 4 which means some restriction and you need help to wear and get out, and 5 which means heavy restriction and you need someone to help you wear and get out.
    Weight: 820 g Normally international postage costs around the same up to 2kg so you can estimate how many items you can fit into one parcel if you want to combine postgage efficiently.
    Custom fit included: YES All our products are made to your measurements.
    – Colors – Sizing – Custom –

    Availability: Usually Ships within 4 weeks from receipt of measurements. Allow additional 1-2 weeks for air mail postage

    Description
    This cute but hardcore romper has sleeves which buckle around your body like a straight jacket. A frilled modesty opening on the attached shorts offers no resistance to entry at all, since it has no zipper. You will need assistance to wear or remove this clothing to its buckled state but you will be able to dress yourself due to the 0.45mm material and then ask a friend to zip and strap you snug. Hood, gag and ballet boots not included (the gag and ballet boots already belonged to our model). Available in your choice of two colors where the trim color is the frill. Zip color may differ from picture depending on availability.

    0303062650
    Free Member

    😉

    Only meant with a wry smile bud! 😉

    Nothing wrong at all with a few metaphors, and certainly not bringing your treatment of the fairer sex into disrepute!!

    jt

    bomberman
    Free Member

    but seriously, get a life! aren’t you an old git anyway? so maybe this is a cover up for the fact that you can’t get a hard on

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    but seriously, get a life! aren’t you an old git anyway? so maybe this is a cover up for the fact that you can’t get a hard on

    what is more ‘life’ than riding one’s bike through snow in the dark ??
    Yes I’m quite old, but no, I have no problem getting hard whatever, thanks all the same :o) In fact, I had hoped advancing age might dull the insistent pangs of lust, but there’s no sign of it yet 🙁

    bomberman
    Free Member

    why would you hope for such a thing

    MrSparkle
    Full Member

    Can’t get his shorts on…

    thisisnotaspoon
    Free Member

    this is it, the end of the world, right?

    rickmeister
    Full Member

    Should try viagra, its good for the oldies, stops them rolling out of bed….

    ton
    Full Member

    barnes, you are a perv…..FACT.

    Poindexter
    Free Member

    Rapist waiting to happen… 😮

    cinnamon_girl
    Full Member

    bomberman – do you want the middle-aged to stop riding their bikes and to stop having fun??

    (hides under crochet blanket).

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    Rapist waiting to happen

    do you mind ? Is that supposed to be funny ? I think we are free to express unspecific imagination without involving a threat to anyone…

    Should I not tell you about “Vinegar Strokes” ?

    nickc
    Full Member

    I feel soiled just reading this.

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    I feel soiled just reading this.

    perhaps you think biking should be all about bikes and who’s in front and technique ? For me it’s thoroughly carnal: sweaty, muddy, exciting, visually enthralling, the feel of the texture of the ground and the smooth engagement of muscle, exhaustion and endorphins :o)

    WhatWouldJesusRide
    Free Member

    Brrrrrr.

    Get a grip [so to speak] before you become another headline on Fark.

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    Get a grip

    oh, very good :o)

    WhatWouldJesusRide
    Free Member

    No, really. Don’t become a warning to others!

    🙂

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    Don’t become a warning to others!

    You can read the full text of my report and judge for yourself tomorrow 🙂

    WhatWouldJesusRide
    Free Member

    Do I dare?

    😯

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    if you dare: my report

    MrNutt
    Free Member

    filth! eaugh! filth!

    I blame the trees, bloody sap rising!

    thisisnotaspoon
    Free Member

    the term “mad speed” doesnt get used often enough!

    bullandbladder
    Free Member

    “untramelled sensual delight”?

    what the HELL are you banging on about, man?

    Never smoke reefer before riding.

    simonfbarnes
    Free Member

    “untramelled sensual delight”?
    what the HELL are you banging on about, man?

    honestly, it really was like that! The yielding but grippy softness of the snow just felt SO fantastic. Not sexual as such, but exciting in a similarly indulgent way to the senses 🙂

    As for drugs, surely they can only be a pale shadow compared to the inescapable immediacy of a real experience ? And there is no downside to the endorphin hit that can only be achieved through serious effort!

    bullandbladder
    Free Member

    It’s an effort to keep reading this unadulterated arse. No…..Not feeling any endorphin hit yet.

    Gets coat, leaves in disgust.

    ell_tell
    Free Member

    Flesh light anyone…

Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 49 total)

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