Whilst away for the Easter school holidays with the kids, I decided to take the bike out for a little spin and take advantage of the rare opportunity to see some sunshine although the trails were quite soft and muddy.
All was going swimmingly and I was having a generally lovely time bimbling along the various trails.
I even stopped to wave to my wife and kids who were out walking a part of the trail which I had already ridden earlier on the other side of the river. All in all, life was pretty good.

This was shattered when I eventually returned to my caravan to be greeted by an ashen faced seven year old who had some very grave news to impart.
Whilst on his walk, they had thought it fun to follow Daddy’s tyre tracks along the trail… the fun ceased abruptly when the littlest panthercub happened across a very recently expired vole who was sporting both a surprised expression and some suspicious tyre tracks squarely across it’s now grossly flattened abdomen.
A deeply moving but impromptu service of remembrance was conducted shortly thereafter.

He glared at me accusingly and asked me why I would commit such an atrocity.
I’m ashamed to say that I was, for a moment, tempted to tell him that I had seen a suspicious looking bad man on a bike in the same area and that it must have been him.

Instead I told him the truth, that I simply didn’t see it (SVIDSY?) and was deeply sorry for my careless actions.

I have been wearing the metaphorical Cone of Shame all week and need to confess.

What steps can I take in the future to avoid the reoccurrence of a such a calamity?
Where can I buy one of those movement scanners like off of Aliens?
Do they come with handlebar mounts?

Dont ride where your family are likely to be walking?

Install Infra Red app on mobile?

Vale Vole

Come the revole-ution, you’ll be first up against the wall.

Come the revole-ution, you’ll be first up against the wall.

I’m so ashamed, I’d vole-unteer. 😳

Blood the boy, get him to run over a family of voles out for a stroll, nibbling stalks and frolicking in the sunshine, tell him this is the way of the world, it is his destiny, he is a predator and voles are the prey. It’s the only way.

I once caught a Robin in a mouse trap.

Are you telling us the vole story though?
If you had rodent earlier this would never have happened and the trail would have been just as mice.

You cannot be held responsible for suicidal voles, in fact you probably need years of PTSD counselling.

you probably need years of PTSD counselling.

You weren’t there man! YOU WEREN’T THERE!

If it’s any consolation, they have a lifespan of about ten minutes anyway. (I think I read somewhere once that the majority live for about a month.)

Tell them it was a lemming and it probably hurled itself under your wheel intentionally.

Surely that makes it worse!

A few years back at Dalby Forest, riding along and spotted a common lizard, the first time I’d ever seen a native wild lizard in England. Suddenly, it decided to cross the trail and I ran over it, killing it instantly. I still feel bad about this today.

I once caught a Robin in a mouse trap

Me too, in a rat trap, at Christmas time as well. Never did get the bloody rat, he left of his own accord the same day I borrowed a mate’s air rifle, the crafty sod.

Even if you can’t manage a bunny hop, surely you can do a vole hop?

Real question is how many incarnations of this vole have you unknowingly killed before and has it set up a perchypanther hate shrine in a cave somewhere plotting it’s revenge a la Agrajag !

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_TGGgkCLD8[/video]
Volare!

I once caught a Robin in a mouse trap.

Baby Robin?

I think that the vole should have been wearing hi-vis and would probably have benefited from some more advanced trail training.

It’s not your fault, you can’t be held to account for not seeing the dangerous little bugger. I mean, what right did it even have to be there – it’s not as if it pays for the upkeep of the trail or anything.

It’s not your fault, you can’t be held to account for not seeing the dangerous little bugger. I mean, what right did it even have to be there – it’s not as if it pays for the upkeep of the trail or anything.

If it was still alive it’d be having a rant about bloody cyclists not having to pay Road-ent Tax

I once caught a Robin in a mouse trap.

Was it the one from the Adam West era?

Pretty brave to ride over one of these!

Oh no wait, that’s a vore.

I once might have ran over a stupid coot. Sat happily on the canal tow path but then decided to make a dart across me. Straight over his neck which resulted in an alive bird going through the death flap motion on the spot. 😳

A mole enjoying it’s dinner earlier..

[video]https://youtu.be/yADpmNklbZM?t=27s[/video]

It’s now a widow…

This story is full of voles.

I once contrived to stand on a ground squirrel while hiking in the Canadian Rockies… for some reason it decided to run out from safety and concealment in the grass straight on to the path just as my boot descended. Not even a squeak to alert me… I wouldn’t even have noticed except that my wife was walking just behind me, and she drew my attention to the (briefly) twitching body.

Felt bad for it, but there was literally nothing I could do. Guess it made a meal for a passing scavenger *walks off humming The Circle Of Life*

*A shrew* ^
bless you

Are you sure it wasn’t a Lemming, they are widely know for committing Hari Kari, they just cant help themselves.

I ran over a rat once. It made the same sort of popping sound that a crisp packet does when you stamp on it.

It’s not pop, it’s more of a rap.

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9m64UgTJ1DM[/video]

A couple of years ago my riding buddy bunny hopped a badger who strayed into our path, I thought he’d just missed it but the huge chunk of fur in his rear mech confirmed he’d basically ridden over the badger’s back!

Just be greatful it wasn’t a bager I had the mispleasure of buying one come down a sandy lane he just ran out and stop last minute I went flying and he just looked at me did a “hunth” noise and walked off while I lay their winded and bruised.