“Planning to fly across country to attend a well organized, completely structured professional bicycle race? Prepare to be disappointed!”
That’s right, the celebration known as the Singlespeed Cyclocross World Championships is back! Affectionately abbreviated to SSCXWC, the circus returns to Portland, Oregon (where it all started) for its 10th anniversary. As such, and for more abbreviated fun, looks like we’ll refer to this event as SSCXWCPDX. Or…wait…we’re also seeing it as SSCXWCXPDX. We assume that extra “X” is the Roman numeral for “10”…referring to the tenth running of the event. Ah…whatever…
The 2016 SSCXWCPDX goes down on December 3 & 4 at Kruger’s Farm on Sauvie Island, which is in Portland. Oregon. As you might know, the event is a giant party centered around the racing of singlespeed cyclocross bicycles. There are parties before the event, during the event, and after the event. But make no mistake, it is a race. And the competition can be fierce. As the FAQ on the web site states, “How hard will it be? Super hard. This is a world championship after all, so you’ll probably be racing against Olympic athletes and washed up pros.” You can also expect some super-fit locals, accomplished amateurs from around the world, and heap of other athletes to can compete as hard as they can party.
The schedule for the weekend is quite straightforward and, from what we’ve heard from previous events, strict:
Saturday December 3, 2016
Revelry, Qualifying Events: Feats of Strength, Wit, and Cunning, Jollification, Chris King Party, Revelment, Kenton Club Gaiety
Sunday December 4, 2016
Carousal, Women’s Championship Event, Saturnalia, Men’s Championship Event, Jollity
On the registration page for SSCXWCPDX, organizers forecast “dry course conditions and temps in the mid 80’s” and suggest you “bring plenty of sunblock.” That’s some wise advice, but we suggest you check the weather before you head out and/or over to Portland.
Speaking of registration, it’s open. What will your $80 registration fee get you? “Who knows. But we can assure you this. It will include some combination of competitive bike racing, partying, alcoholic beverages, weed, fun, food, and good times.”
Well that certainly sounds fun.
In case you have no idea what this is all about, here’s a legendary video from “back in the day” when the event was last in Portland – when the enigma known as singlespeed cyclocross racing was young, innocent and trying to make a name for itself.
You might think it kind of looks like regular cyclocross racing, but with more costumes, smoke and…foam. But, oh, how wrong you would be.