Wife and Child away, what shall I get up to?

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  • Wife and Child away, what shall I get up to?
  • jekkyl
    Member

    A rare event this weekend, my wife has taken our child and they’ve gone away with her parents and her brother as it’s his birthday and won’t be back until 5pm sunday. As I’m working today I’ve been left behind… ๐Ÿ™ …….. by myself ๐Ÿ˜€

    I’m finishing work at 2 today and the sun is out, so the plan is go home and straight out of the door on 2 wheels, either a short forest ride for a couple of hours then home for tea then out again with my mate to return sometime around 11-12 OR sod my mate off and go out for 4ish get the train somewhere and cycle back. Either way it will be hoome for midnight for drinking and nuts, possible movie or some playstation action till I fall asleep dribbling on the sofa.

    Then tomorrow I have the whole day for doing whatever I want, I can’t believe the freedom, not being woken at 6.30 by my little girl will be a blessing in itself. Then do I go epic all dayer or afternoon/evening jaunt not leaving myself too tired for sunday when I plan to go to Cannock. Decision Decisions!

    Asda are doing 4 cans of stella for ยฃ3 so I shall be popping in there first of all on way home. ๐Ÿ˜€

    Premier Icon Drac
    Subscriber

    Ride bikes, pub for beer not lager flavoured water, eat junk food, play on your console if you have one, pick any TV you like without having to suffer chick TV such as Take Me Out or Celebs Dance on Ice Idol.

    gogg
    Member

    Stella???

    Get some Marstons pedigree youth!

    Premier Icon binners
    Subscriber

    Whats the point of drinking Stella if theres no wife to beat?

    gogg
    Member

    From 11pm, Babestation…?

    cbmotorsport
    Member

    Sorry to piss on your chips, but I guarantee you’ll be awake at 6.30 anyway, daughter or not.

    Ride your bike, sit on the sofa in just your pants, scratch your nuts, drink beer, watch what the hell you like, don’t wash up, eat take away…you do remember being single right?

    Premier Icon Drac
    Subscriber

    .you do remember being single right?

    *sniff!* Yes.

    Premier Icon wiggles
    Subscriber

    Beer, Full volume Pr0n and take away

    Premier Icon binners
    Subscriber

    I’ve heard rumours that on that new-fangled inter web thing, if you have a good old shufty around, its possible to find pictures of ladies with no clothes on. If thats true, then that might be worth having a peek at

    Walk around the house naked.
    Take a sh!t with the bathroom door wide open.
    Internet filth.

    Premier Icon Rubber_Buccaneer
    Subscriber

    Coke, whores and pron. I think I have summed up the rest of this thread ๐Ÿ™‚

    johndoh
    Member

    I had this last night. I was like an excited kid on Christmas morning as I returned home, Asda Vindaloo and a bottle of red in a shopping bag, PS3 updated and ready to roar with COD MW3.

    Then I started wandering around, lost. I tidied the kitchen, watered the plants. Had a little drink, fixed my little girls curtains (ripped down accidentally the day before). Then I sorted the recycling and tidied some stuff in the man-cave.

    I started to feel like David Kessler in American Werewolf in the scene where he is wandering around Alex Price’s flat, not knowing what to do with himself.

    Eventually I relaxed and had my dinner and some wine but I can’t wait for them to get home tonight!

    jekkyl
    Member

    I…. didn’t mean …to call you… meat loaf Jack!

    yossarian
    Member

    Piss in every sink

    And out of the back door.

    All of the above and ten minutes before they’re due back:
    DUst and hoover living room
    Clean bathroom til it shines
    Reorganise sock draw
    Still life drawing, bowl of fruit preferably
    Spot of gardening
    defrost the fridge/freezer
    wash the skirting boards
    bake bread
    Write a poem
    do a roast

    Premier Icon wiggles
    Subscriber

    Rubber_Buccaneer – Member
    Coke, whores and pron

    Coke.horse.prawn

    scruff
    Member

    Get drunk, piss in the back garden looking up at the stars.

    Milkie
    Member

    Clean cassette, chainset and other stuff your not allowed to put in the dishwasher, in the dishwasher. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    torihada
    Member

    wiggles – Member
    Rubber_Buccaneer – Member
    Coke, whores and pron

    Coke.horse.prawn

    classic.

    Gary_M
    Member

    Turn the heating down to a reasonable level.

    Premier Icon mikewsmith
    Subscriber

    Fart, order take away delivered, leave boxes and empty bottles everywhere, don’t make the bed, leave pants in the living room, walk round naked.

    10 mins before they get back manic tidy up or hire a french maid to do it

    Premier Icon Rusty Spanner
    Subscriber

    johndoh – Member

    I started to feel like David Kessler in American Werewolf in the scene where he is wandering around Alex Price’s flat, not knowing what to do with himself.

    After feeling like that, how could you not put the DVD on and watch the shower scene on repeat?

    Get the sherman out of the way first thing and then you’ll be able to plan more effectively.

    johndoh
    Member

    After feeling like that, how could you not put the DVD on and watch the shower scene on repeat

    Mmmmm good point. She really was a beautiful thing was my Jenny.

    Premier Icon ransos
    Subscriber

    We know full well that the OP is going to have a relaxing, candlelit bath, put on a fluffy dressing gown, open the chardonnay and chocolates, and stick on a Bridget Jones DVD.

    iolo
    Member

    You know that bar man you’ve always had the hots for?
    He’s yours for a bit of hot loving tonight and tomorrow he’ll bring a friend called dennis and some baby oil.
    Have fun.

    Premier Icon kimbers
    Subscriber

    its time to eat some cheese slices

    Roter Stern
    Member

    You could always come over here and babysit for my four so myself and Mrs Stern can go for a night out! ๐Ÿ™‚

    gogg
    Member

    We know full well that the OP is going to have a relaxing, candlelit bath, put on a fluffy dressing gown, open the chardonnay and chocolates, and stick on a Bridget Jones DVD.

    @ransos, loving your work! ๐Ÿ™‚

    globalti
    Member

    Stella? *Ptew* Go and buy some proper beer, not Europiss and get a couple of mates around.

    Be careful what parts you do put in the dishwasher, the hot caustic wash will wreck the finish on any alloy – guess how I know this?

    Kimbers, you’re a sick man.

    Premier Icon 19ninety
    Subscriber

    ride hard, eat junk, drink beer, bash one out, watch some films, stuff, etc.

    Premier Icon slowoldman
    Subscriber

    Playstation and Stella?
    Is this what the world has come to?
    Much simpler pleasures when I were a lad.

    Premier Icon Rusty Spanner
    Subscriber

    Atari and a Party Seven?

    Premier Icon slowoldman
    Subscriber

    Party Seven and a well thumbed publication.

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