Viewing 36 posts - 1 through 36 (of 36 total)
  • Where is Mark Francois
  • Premier Icon Pigface
    Free Member

    Usually the most chopsy and belligerent of the swivel eyed loons, but strangely MIA.

    Could he have more pressing things on his mind.

    Premier Icon binners
    Full Member

    He’s away on location, filming

    He’s the new James Bond

    Premier Icon Blackflag
    Full Member

    Arguing with himself in the bathroom mirror after checking his maid’s paperwork.

    Premier Icon Spud
    Full Member

    Yomping on Dartmoor but couldn’t get over the first stile..

    Premier Icon hatter
    Full Member

    Painting ‘Up Yours Delors’ on all the sea mines he’s planning to put in the English channel on Jan 1st.

    Premier Icon kerley
    Free Member

    He was on TV last week on some news program. He was still telling us how Brexit will still be fine as the EU needs us more then we need them

    Premier Icon Coyote
    Free Member

    Keeping a low profile due to what are, I’m sure unsubstantiated rumours..?

    Premier Icon Harry_the_Spider
    Full Member

    There were stories circulating a few weeks back that he may have committed a serious offense.

    No idea whether they were dismissed or otherwise. Happy to be corrected / updated.

    Premier Icon dazh
    Full Member

    I’ve been very much enjoying the ‘where’s Mark Francois’ threads on twitter. It’s like a big collective running joke. In fact almost every time a tory MP pops up someone asks them about his whereabouts. They must be sick of it by now.

    Premier Icon richmtb
    Full Member

    There were stories circulating a few weeks back that he may have committed a serious offense.

    Caught inflagrante delicto with a picture of a Lancaster bomber perhaps?

    Premier Icon kimbers
    Full Member

    Somewhere a poor copper is having to trawl through his hard drive

    grim

    Premier Icon Coyote
    Free Member

    Apparently he has been getting someone to proxy vote for him in the HoC which is a privilege that he may not be entitled to.

    Premier Icon Blackflag
    Full Member

    He’s been seen puffing round Llandegla on an e-bike.

    Premier Icon martinhutch
    Full Member

    I believe that his manly military exploits have caught the attention of the monarch, and he is waiting at home, awaiting an invitation to pleasure Her Majesty at a later date.

    Premier Icon PJM1974
    Free Member

    Caught inflagrante delicto with a picture of a Lancaster bomber perhaps?

    Pretend you’re an average man having sex with a Lancaster bomber by being Mark Francois and having sex with a 1/72 scale model Lancaster bomber.

    I reckon that once Francois has resolved his current indisposition he’ll be a shoe-in for Miniature for Defence.

    Premier Icon zippykona
    Full Member

    Death by horse dick.

    In an infinite universe this will definitely happen to a Tory scumbag.

    Premier Icon Klunk
    Free Member

    Arguing with himself in the bathroom mirror

    is he tall enough to see over the sink ?

    Premier Icon tomd
    Full Member

    My nice tory MP Simon Clarke quit last week as minister and got kicked out by his wife over an (alleged) affair* with a colleague. People assuming it’s a woman. But Mark has disappeared too. Makes you think, and you might need mind bleach when you consider he’s 6’7″.

    *obviously conducted in a socially distanced CV19 compliant way, which might explain why the story has been supressed. Reeks of an injunction.

    Premier Icon oakleymuppet
    Free Member

    Oberleutnant Mark Francois is apparently on a covert operation.

    Premier Icon oldmanmtb2
    Free Member

    If the wildly unsubstantiated rumours have any truth… he would need a stool (to stand on)

    I thought I was better than that, but apparently not.

    Premier Icon oldmanmtb2
    Free Member

    Francois in a gimp mask… try bleaching that from your brain..

    Premier Icon kilo
    Full Member

    On an o/t matter good to see the party of law and order assessing ex-Dover MP Elphick’s sentencing for three counts of sexual assault as an “excessive sentence”.

    Premier Icon doomanic
    Full Member

    Francois in a gimp mask… try bleaching that from your brain..

    Better than without…

    Premier Icon oakleymuppet
    Free Member

    Francois in a gimp mask… try bleaching that from your brain..

    ann widdecombe will do it.

    Premier Icon retro83
    Free Member

    So what’s the punishment if (as Twitter says) somebody has been voting on his behalf contrary to the rules?

    Premier Icon martinhutch
    Full Member

    So what’s the punishment if (as Twitter says) somebody has been voting on his behalf contrary to the rules?

    It’s a very limited and specific breach of the rules, so no bother.

    Premier Icon retro83
    Free Member

    martinhutch

    It’s a very limited and specific breach of the rules, so no bother.

    😁

    Premier Icon eddiebaby
    Full Member

    In an infinite universe this will definitely happen to a Tory scumbag.

    In an infinite universe it will also happen to you. Be careful what you wish for.

    Premier Icon sparksmcguff
    Full Member

    Mark Francois is an odorous little toad. His misuse of his proxy vote is just one more example of the erosion of democratic norms in the U.K. by the Conservative party.

    Premier Icon dannyh
    Full Member

    Where is Mark Francois?

    So many possibilities.

    1. Fallen down the back of a sofa.
    2. Disappeared up his own anus.
    3. Disappeared up Dominic Cummings’s anus.
    4. Attending a conference for puffed-up, short, fat little tossers.

    Of course, reading between the lines of a story from about a month ago…..there could well be another explanation.

    Premier Icon MSP
    Full Member

    Wasn’t his last public sighting to threaten the head of the armed forces with Cummings?

    …makes you think!

    Premier Icon pondo
    Full Member

    Is it not that he’s just too small to see?

    Premier Icon dannyh
    Full Member

    Maybe he’s gone back to his old job advising Danger Mouse?

    Premier Icon johnnystorm
    Full Member

    The hashtag on twitter suggests a huge step up from just being an odious shit.

    Premier Icon jimdubleyou
    Full Member

    The hashtag on twitter suggests a huge step up from just being an odious shit.

    Go on, tells us what it is…

    Premier Icon johnnystorm
    Full Member

    Just search for his name on twitter.

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