What’s the worst thing you’ve landed in when falling off?
on the bike – caught my bars at my local woods and went straight into a barbed wire fence. That really hurt.
off the bike – just off piste on a black run enjoying fresh snowfall, hammering it, then hitting something square with the front of the board hidden under the powder. Massive front flip followed by sky, snow, sky, snow, sky, snow….for a long time. Ripped jacket open and pulled my trousers down! Had to dig compacted snow out of everything luckily no actual injury and board survived. Tbh snow is probably the best thing I could have landed in on that particular crash…Posted 9 months ago
Cycling home slightly worse for wear in the pitch black with no lights through Grantchester Meadows, I cycled straight into a herd of cows sleeping on the path. Over the bars, bounced off a cow and landed in the middle of the herd which promply got up and proceeded to both stand and shat on me.
Brilliant, laughed at that one !!!!!Posted 9 months ago
I’m glad we’re back to things like riding into cows instead of near-fatal impalements 🙂Posted 9 months ago
A sobbing mess of utter desperate ness to do up the poppers on my shortsPosted 9 months ago
Probably the rocky landing at Cathkin after an innocuous front wheel washout which smashed my shoulder 7 weeks ago, been in a sling since and had shoulder reconstruction last week…Posted 9 months ago
Spain 1991, riding through suburban wasteland. Went OTB, landed among a load of used heroin syringes, complete with needles. There was a huge heroin epidemic at the time. Didn’t ride that way again…Posted 9 months ago
I have two, one which looked fine but wasn’t and one which looked really terrible, but wasn’t!
1) A new trail appeared in my local woods. AH-HA i thought, new trail! Lets ride it. So i sent it off down what was a rather good trail at an significant rate of knots, only to send a blind turn/drop off a large log combo that turned out to be the end of the trail, because that’s as far as the trail monkeys had got with building it! Luckily, there was a huge and soft looking rhododendron bush, so i chose to crash into that. Unfortunately, that same invitingly bushy bush was also where said trail monkeys had hidden their trail building tools, and as i crashed in, a caught the handle of a large spade straight up and under my jaw (i was in a full face helmet), which slammed my mouth shut, to the point where i saw stars for a good few minutes. Amazing, nothing broke, but it felt like i’d not found a soft landing so much as a knockout one!
2) Coming down off the top of Les Arcs, from Arc1600, down through the woods, under the pipes, and cutting down through various brilliant trails, i thought i knew where i was, so sent it off a blind drop, which if it were the one i though it was, would have been into a lovel long smooth landing into a nice vertical gulley. Unfortunately, THAT gulley was not actually on the trail i had ended up on, and i basically sent it out into a massive spikey bolder field because the trail i WAS one had a 90 degree switch back at the bottom of the run in! Astonishingly, despite the almost certain chance of serious injury, landing from about 15 foot up at about 20 mph, i managed to land directly on top of one bolder, that “cusioned” (relatively speaking) my fall, and then bounced to land flat on my back on the only other large smooth bolder on that side of the mountain! Astonishing, especially to my riding buddies who were already composing my eulogy, all i suffered was a brusied lower back, and was bascially un-injured and rode the rest of the holiday fine! In fact, i nearly twisted an ankle trying to recover my bike that had bounced some distance and was making a bid to beat me back to Bourg 🙂Posted 9 months ago
A dustbin. Head first. Actually no, it was hands first. My arms were then rendered useless by my bodyweight crushing them into the bottom of the bin. The bin fell over with me stuck in it. My bike was still attached to my feet, thanks to good old fashioned toe clips. It took two people to remove me from the bin and bike. Mostly because they were laughing so much. I can’t blame them.Posted 9 months ago
Hawthorn tree. I was picking thorns out of pustules for a couple of weeks.Posted 9 months ago
Either the tree stump on the North Yorkshire Moors or the 1 bar gate in Wark Forest. I’m still concussed from each one.Posted 9 months ago
A few winters ago, recent snow and -10C so decided to bimble along the towpath on my single speed – it was mainly crunchy, except the bit where it dipped under the canal bridge and the local kids had polished it smooth. Took my foot out, but fell on my arse and was propelled quite elegantly into the water. I remember looking up from under the water at the blue sky. I was about 10 miles from home and realised that if I called for a lift / waited then hypothermia was a distinct possibility so decided to ride home to keep warm.Posted 9 months ago
I landed in deep shit with the girlfriend when I seriously scuffed my face up on a gravel OTB hours before going out to meet her family for the first time.Posted 9 months ago
The feshie in the middle of the night in November in -6 …….Posted 9 months ago
Lost balance while riding a narrow raised section and fell backwards , putting my arm out behind me to save myself . Turned out that I’d put it straight into the body of a dead and decaying sheep , in through the ribcage and out the other side .Posted 9 months ago
I know how awful that is. I did a similar thing when bouldering up near Trevor rocks back in the ‘90s.Posted 9 months ago
No bouldering may, just a bit of carpet to wipe shoes on. Came off a crimpy overhanging bit while doing a mid level traverse and landed on a dead sheep. The impact drove all the gas out of the carcass so as well as slightly rotten meat and intestine contents I was also covered in my own vomit. Had to throw those clothes away and ride back to Wrexham in my pants as my mate would t let me back in his car otherwise!
I’ve been in that same pit at coldharbour. Twice!
Posted 9 months ago
About 20 years ago a mate who thought he was Danny Mac tried to ride across a narrow wooden bridge which needed a good hop and 90 degree shuffle to get on. His front wheel slid out and he fell straight into a stream. He submerged briefly and after we had all stopped laughing we spent ten minutes picking tiny leeches of his arms, legs and neck….same guy endo’d into a barb wire fence and landed on it chin first. It looked like he’d been attacked by vampires.Posted 9 months ago
Various spiky cactus like things riding in Spain. The usual stinking mud.
By far the worst I’ve seen was on the Trailbreak Iron Lemming many years back. There was a fast downhill along a gully beside a drystone wall. A large ewe had breathed its last and lay rotting right in the centre of the gully, There was a line up the bank around it but one poor rider had piled straight into the dead sheep, OTB’d over the top and landed in the stinking liquid death trickling down the slope on the far side. We found him trying to wash his clothes in a public toilet at a feed stop. Two day event, and he was sleeping in a village hall with no showers…..Posted 9 months ago
Blimey where do I start?
2009 riding on Dartmoor from Princetown towards South Hessary Tor, back in the days when they had mud bank water bars on the trail. Flying along getting quicker & quicker & more confident over the mud water bars using them as kickers to get air, then on the final one the handle bars landed at 2 o’clock rather than 12 o’clock, the front tyre dug in & the bike disappeared, at this point I then had a Dartmoor granite facial at around 15mph 🙁 it took most of the skin off my face from my chin to mouth. Funniest moment was sitting in minor injuries unit waiting to be seen when my LBS rang me to say that my other bike was ready for collection.
On a night ride I knew there was a new grantie clapper bridge coming up that had 2 stone slabs sat side by side & I didn’t want to ride across the middle where there was a gap, cue me getting it all wrong & the front wheel getting trapped in the gap, the bike stopped dead I didn’t and went OTB, I ended up on the far bank with my feet in the stream a little dazed, my mate came running back asking ‘Are you alright?’ …. Yes, I said when you get off my bloody hand!!! which he was stood on.
Next up 2013 again on Dartmoor flying down the Widowmaker & near the bottom I thought I saw a large rock in the middle of a tight right hand turn, decided to go left of the rock but was going way too fast to make the corner so went straight on, according to Strava I hit the gorse bush with my face at 12mph 🙁 ended up almost ripping my Tragus off my ear which needed 3 stitches to re-attach it.
My latest was 8th Nov 2019 on my road bike this time, I was knocked off my bike by a car on a roundabout 🙁 Luckily for me he hit my bike rather than me, however I hit the road face first & ended up with 15 stitches in my face & six stitches in my right knee 🙁Posted 9 months agoPosted 9 months ago
A putrefying, part skeletonised sheep carcass in Bin Coombe, Quantocks.Posted 9 months ago
Scotland – but then I was on the Pennine Way in the Cheviots at the time. Had I fallen off the other way the answer would have been England. Every so often there’s a gap in the paved section with a peat filled hole just daring you to have a go…Posted 9 months ago
Found the photo of the wife’s “landing on rebar” puncture wound. Quite tidy considering…
[url=https://flic.kr/p/2hWa6LD]Puncture wound[/url] by Ben Freeman, on Flickr
She was very lucky, it didn’t puncture any organs and the hospital just cleaned it out, packed it with gauze and sent her on her way. Luckily no infection or any other problems.Posted 9 months ago
A very long time ago in a galaxy far far away…was out in the wilds of Glen Feshie on a MBR route with @nobbingsford. Once more directionally challenged (frequent occurrence) we stopped to work out where a wall was we were supposed to be following when I stepped in a boggy bit of ground and disappeared thigh deep. Needless to say @nobbingsford was ‘suitably’ sympathetic. I returned the favour (total lack of sympathy shown but much laughing) when he lost his shoe in a boggy bit on Deels Hill/Border Ridge in Northumberland.Posted 9 months ago
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