Just wondered because we've got a few guys at work who cycle in on £50 supermarket bikes and when they go wrong they come and see me to fix them.

The most recent one was a loose left hand crank.
The square taper hole in the crank was worn so bad that the bolt was bottomed out against the BB spindle and it was still wobbling.
I did consider grinding 3mm off the spindle so it would grip further on the taper, but it would probably have hit the BB bearing first.
The owner asked me how much a new pedal would cost from Halfords. I had to explain several times that he needed a crank arm, not a pedal.

Most people wouldn't be seen dead in a Lada or pre-VW Skoda, yet they'll buy the cheapest bike they can and expect it to last for ever with no maintenance.
They will then look shocked at the thought of paying 20% of the original purchase price for a new chain.

My LBS has got a sign by the door saying "Minimum £25 labour charge for all supermarket and internet bikes" which would put most of them off.

How do you deal with people every day who have got absolutely no idea about bikes and what it takes to keep them roadworthy, but expect you to repair them almost for free ?

Patience. They're most of our market in terms of repairs. Fixing bikes is fixing bikes and you learn an awful lot of new skills (and words…) on those cheap bikes. At the end of the day it's still bikes. Most people accept that they've bought something rubbish and that fixing it will cost a bit. If not then we have to take what they say then ignore it- if we did stuff for the prices that sort of person expects then no bike shop would exist, just JJBs.

I flat refuse to fix anything that says Dunlop on it though. Jesus christ.

I have no problem with people who aren't clued up on bikes, it's the ones who want something for, or next to nothing, be they supermarket or bling bikes. I have to pay wages and myself, personally I don't like working for free.
I set my labour charges which I hope are reasonable and fair. Labour charges in bike shops are still some of the cheapest around in the service industry.

If bikes are really poor quality, or boxed new from internet or Argos etc I refer them back to where they purchased it. If I fix/assemble their bike has problems you can guarantee they will be moaning at me. We have been trading for over a century now and I see no reason to tarnish our image with substandard products.

I'd like to add, it's still working on bikes. So it's still good living.

The guys in my LBS (Primera, Bournemouth) were very good with my brother's knackered 10 year old supermarket FS.

They couldn't get over how heavy it was, but did a really good job of making it road-worthy.

It's never going to be a 'good' bike, but at least now it won't kill him!

It's a tough one, because it's a nightmare working on some of the "Death Chariots" that are out there, but needs must… It's when you spend an hour on a bike trying to get the brakes even vaguely working when it was only in for pads that I get pissed… The kids bikes are the worst… I think it's criminal how substandard some kids bikes are!

I would imagine that a mechanic in a bike shop is 90% bicycle shaped objects and 10% bikes. At best.

Every now and then, you just have to say, sorry, I'm not working on your bike. It's best for the business and best for the customer.
Remember – do only good work, if it can't be good don't do it. And … You can't polish a turd! (best not to say that to the customer though)
Quote people unhappy too. Charge people for the time they spend haggling and moaning about the price – add it all up. The worse the bike is, the more I'll charge.

imagine that a mechanic in a bike shop is 90% bicycle shaped objects and 10% bikes

depends what kind of shop you worked in …

the local shop i worked in for many years wasnt ….

it wasnt till i went to a larger (more expensive) chain store to work(in another town i moved to) that i got onto those sorts of figures of crap vs good …

if you explain to folk clearly and dont try and bull shit them then they seem to be more than willing to either pay up or buy a new bike.

"…it's the ones who want something for, or next to nothing…"
That's what I meant.

Most people accept that if their car goes in to a garage for service or repair, it's going to cost a lot of money. They probably resent it, but they accept it.

In the case above, he asked me how much a new pedal would cost. I explained again that he needed a crank arm, not a pedal, and guessed that he would have to buy a complete chainset which would be around £25.
He was shocked at the idea of spending £25 on his bike, yet he would probably think £100 for some minor repair on his car was normal.

I explained again that he needed a crank arm, not a pedal, and guessed that he would have to buy a complete chainset which would be around £25.

Plenty of places will sell individual crank arms. Had exactly the same issue with a mate's bike – "Me pedal's come off". Got there with a set of spare pedals and the crank arm was done for. Drove up to Paul's cycles, £7 later and we were sorted.

£25 is probably a very large fraction of what the guy spent on the bike in the first place!

"£25 is probably a very large fraction of what the guy spent on the bike in the first place!"
Yeah, I think that's the problem. A quick look on Halfords website shows their cheapest bike at £90.
It must be hard to explain to a potential customer that a fairly minor repair is going to cost nearly half the original purchase price of the bike.

example:

"you need a chain,freewheel,both wheels trued and brake/gear cables.. parts will cost £60 and its £35 labour… our new bikes start at £250 with a warranty/free service.. or you could buy similar to what you already have for approx 40 quid more than the repair bill from tesco/halfords.. also consider that the rest of the parts are the same age/condition as what has just worn out/failed so be wary of what could go wrong next… to be honest i wouldnt want to try fixing the bike for those reasons as i wouldnt be able to sleep at night having charged you £95 for a repair on a bike that could be replaced for an extra £30 quid so …yep, to cut a long story short i would rather not repair it!"

"ok,thanks for yer honesty.. it does seem crazy to spend that amount"

At that point you have got the message across without telling them how crap their bike is.you convince them that it makes sense and they choose to buy a new bike or go for another catalogue bike. Some shop workers/owners dont have the time or patience and might walk outside the shop to take one look at the bike,turn their nose up and say "nah sorry mate we dont touch catalogue bikes" end of.. but its nice to give the customer options.

Everyone has diffrent views on this though and would slate me for dumping a bike that was in nearly perfectly good working order.

Well take it to some recyclebicycle outlet!