Every evening I drive home from work, open the door at 5:45 , hang up my jacket, walk into the dining room and sit down at the head of table, surrounded by the adoring faces of my waiting children, at which point my wife appears from the kitchen and sits my dinner on the table in front of me.
Sounds idyllic doesn’t it?
Before anyone blows a gasket about how this sort of mysoginistic chauvinism should not be tolerated in the modern world let me explain………
If I DON’T arrive from work at exactly the right time and immediately bolt down my dinner, then whichever of the kids is due to be at football / music lessons / swimming / Boys Brigade / Girls Brigade will be late and, crucially, it will be ALL MY FAULT! Domestic bollocking ensues.
The carefully timed routine of kids activities / baths / stories / brushing teeth etc. MUST NOT be disrupted.
I’m a victim of the system, yer honner!