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Wedding cancellation – how much is reasonable tp pay caterer
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konabunnyFree Member
I’m sorry to hear this and hope it works out. Marriage is a freaky thing. From what I remember, 75% to 100% loss of deposit wasn’t unusual within the month. And to be fair, they’re not going to get another booking within three weeks (although they’re not going to be paying their casual waiting staff for work they didn’t do either).
It’s a complete pisser but I think by dropping it to below 50% they may be being more than reasonable. Sorry. =:(
If the contract doesn’t have cancellation policies (or you haven’t signed a contract), then tell them to whistle.
Mnnnnooooo… Think of it the other way around: someone promises to pay you GBP100 to replace a boiler at their house on Monday morning. On Sunday night, they call you and tell you not to bother. You don’t think they’re liable to you for *anything*?
kimbersFull Memberim keen on a spitroast for my wedding too
childish snickering aside it works out at great value but will i come accross as cheap??
ps sorry for thread hijack
tomzoFree MemberKimbers, I reckon it depends alot on the rest of the wedding. If its a fairly informal, summer wedding, set outside in a big marquee etc then no worries, but if its more of a tradtional wedding….not so much
Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middling Edition
Latest Singletrack VideosFresh Goods Friday 696: The Middlin...konabunnyFree MemberOh, do stick a sock in it, TJ. There are people on this board with 100,000 quid’s worth of bike and car in their garage. Spending a portion of that to share the most important event in someone’s life with a few dozen/ score/ hundred of your closest friends and relatives is perfectly worth it, and if you want to. There’s nothing wrong with not wanting to yourself but don’t dump on other people who do!
FWIW, in the 2 years I have been to two weddings which were the most fun of my life: one had 400-500 guests and took place over two days with four locations; and the other had about 50 and took place in a community hall venue in a nature park with most of the arrangements done by the (incredibly gracious and friendly) bride and groom. So pretty much both ends of the scale – but both fantastic because they were fun and what the brides/grooms wanted for themselves.
joemarshallFree MemberCynic-al – curious as to why tinker-belle is incorrent with saying that if a cancellation term hasn’t been agreed why they would they be forced to pay anything?
If you’ve signed up to pay someone a certain amount for a service on a particular date, in a contract with no cancellation terms, then by default you can’t just cancel. You have agreed to pay that money. All the cancellation charge does is gives you an option to get out of the agreed contract for a fixed fee, rather than having to have arguments / negotiation about it. You can’t just go breaking any old contract just because it doesn’t say how the money will be sorted in the event of you not wanting the service.
Joe
cynic-alFree Memberfarmer giles – OP is liable for caterer’s losses – but you are correct in that in practical terms he may be able to get away with a cheeky offer as the amount is not big enough to guaranteee they’d pursue it in the courts.
kimbersFull Memberwhy not just have organise an stw ride to end up at the venue charge 45 quid a head and we can all have a posh meal at the end
and cover everything in mud i suspecthoraFree Memberkimbers, works out at circa £200 per pig for a spitroast. Agree with Tomzo although I think a spitroast (IF its Summers and in the evening) can transend any style of wedding IMO. Its got that warm, relaxing feel. I think it throws formal, perfunctal out of the window. No one (well not any of my friends) would look at it and go ‘ah, hes a bit common’. After all, weddings are supposed to be fun and memorable for the right reasons naay? Anyway, we couldnt compete with the two weddings from last year- they were expensive and very highly organised!! Sorry for the hijack 🙂
woffleFree MemberOh, do stick a sock in it, TJ. There are people on this board with 100,000 quid’s worth of bike and car in their garage. Spending a portion of that to share the most important event in someone’s life with a few dozen/ score/ hundred of your closest friends and relatives is perfectly worth it, and if you want to. There’s nothing wrong with not wanting to yourself but don’t dump on other people
+1
My wife thinks that ANY money spent on a bike is wasted. Likewise I can’t get my head around her shoe / handbag enthusiasm. We spent well above the national average on our wedding – 100 relatives in a tent in my parents garden. Best day of my life and money well spent IMO..
As far as spit-roasts go – grand idea. We thought about it but decided to go with something similar and got the caterers to do bacon-butties, hotdogs and melted, gloopy brie on bread in the evening. Really informal, not particularly expensive and went down a treat on a warm July evening after a few cool beers, dancing etc.
OP – hope it all works out.
TheLittlestHoboFree MemberWhy do people get hung up on money when discussing weddings.
The Brants of this world are just as bad with their shoe string weddings as trophies. I am not sure me and my wife even discussed the financial part of getting married. We sat down with her parents and said we are getting married on x date. We would love them to come along and we will be getting married abroad. Her father insisted on buying the dress and a few other bits and that was the end of the financial discussion. We got a lovely wedding that we saved up for previously ourselves.
A good wedding is one that the bride & groom enjoy and remember without getting themselves into financial debt over it. Everything else is secondry.
avdave2Full MemberWhatever it costs It’ll be cheaper than going ahead with it. 🙂
horaFree MemberDunno. Our friends over in Germany had a stunning wedding, the evening part was on a American-style ranch in the middle of the countryside and it was well, wow. It must have cost them a fortune however they have different motivators/drivers to me etc. For instance, the groom is happy with a Opel even though he has a great/well paid job and he thinks Im crackers for spending more than E100 on a bike. Everyones different.
NZColFull Memberfeenster – dunno what to suggest about your predicament. Weddings seem to attract some sort of ‘fcukem’ premium so chances are the 50% offer is reasonable. Although on reflection (fast reflection) that far out what would they have committed too ? Probably
Anyway, the nosey bstrd part of me is interested in why the cold feet ?
farmer-gilesFree Memberjoe – the caterer would have to prove loss and expense to recover these reasonable costs; from my limited knowledge the caterer could not be able to claim for potential return on any other function he “may” have secured if he hadn’t accepted this booking. hence, requesting a breakdown of costs would be fair.
most things are negotiable and the caterer has provided an initial offer of settlement for the breach of contract that is lower than his normal terms (and i doubt it is made ‘without prejudice’) 😉Harry_the_SpiderFull MemberI think that you should spend as much or as little as you want, it’s your choice. The people that make comment about the cost on such a personal issue should button it.
I was at a huge wedding over the weekend, I’ve also been to a £45 one. Opposite ends of the spectrum but both were great and will stick in the memory of everyone who went.
Mine cost about £12k. We got what we wanted and had a fantastic day, which is surely what it is all about.Back to the OP. I think that you are going to have to cough up.
tomzoFree MemberDo you have to pay cancellation fee’s on everything else as well?? Costly if so!
convertFull MemberNice “non-work” if you can get it! Not in the trade so don’t know the exact figures, but seeings most (if not all) catering staff used for events like this are employed on a casual basis and they don’t have to pay for the food/wine etc the profit margin on a cancelled event must be higher than on an event that goes ahead.
Sorry, it has all fallen through but cudos for making the decision. My sister went through with a lavish (in comparison to mine) wedding when they should have called it off as the momentum kept them going on a train to nowhere. Seperated after 5 months (turns out he was having an affair before and after said wedding) and still in the divorce process now. If she goes down that route again, it will never be the same the 2nd time around.
DrJFull MemberWhy do people get hung up on money when discussing weddings
Dunno. My wife’s uncle spent 40K on his son’s wedding at the bride pissed off after a week.
Harry_the_SpiderFull MemberDunno. My wife’s uncle spent 40K on his son’s wedding at the bride pissed off after a week.
😯
Ouch.
But if he can afford £40k on the wedding he can afford a couple of grand to have her kneecapped.
DrJFull MemberThere’s nothing wrong with not wanting to yourself but don’t dump on other people who do!
Of course – people should do what they want.
But…
most people getting married have concerns like paying a mortgage, saving for kids etc., in which circumstances it seems a bit weird to blow a huge amount on a one day party.
Assuming they do pay themselves, of course, and not expect the bride’s father to stump up. If my daughter wants a posh wedding, she can do as she chooses – I ain’t paying!!
(I got married in a Justice of the Peace office over a pharmacy, and then rushed off to my next lecture. Possibly not the most romantic story ever told)
mastiles_fanylionFree MemberSo, we are going the other way- spitroast, folk band (use the one that played at our friends), use of a family property. Hey presto!
We did something similar – marquee in my wife’s parent’s house, big BBQ (by caterers). Stopped short of getting my mate’s band to play as it wasn’t fair on having a friend play at my wedding.
Still cost a huge amount of money – the marquee alone was several thousand. 🙁
convertFull MemberHow many folks pay for their own wedding these days? We paid for our own wedding (minus the champagne for the toast, which my folks bought us as a pressie) and as a consequence had a very personal day with only those we wanted there (no friends of parents and the like). I have been amazed how many of my friends in their 30s, already living together in mortgaged houses etc have let parents pay for most/all of the day. just seems wrong in modern day society where people are getting maried later when they are more independent. Paying for your own also keeps a reality check on costs and helps to ensure it is happening for the right reasons.
scotiaFree MemberTJ put a sock in it + another 1 jeesus wept.
all the best in the future feenster
skipratFree MemberWe are in the process of saving for our wedding (next feb) and it’ll cost us about £9k. Yes its alot for one day, and think of all the things we could of got instead but we are happy and want to share the day with our family and friends. I’m 33 and our lass is 28, the only thing that her mum and dad are buying is her dress. And yes we live together with a mortgage and other bills. I wouldn’t say that we are rolling in it but with a little bit of planning, its easy to save up for the day.
As for the original problem, looking at the paperwork we have, i’d try and knock some off what they’re asking for but its not far out.
Best of luck with it all mate. Like some other peole have said, better off now than 2 weeks after!!!
horaFree MemberGF’s putting together a business plan for sourcing wedding dresses made overseas- she works in the fashion/far east sourcing (goes overseas alot) and found a place that makes them very well (apperently). She sourced our mates and it arrived TWO weeks after it was ordered (and made made to measure!). All proper materials etc.
Wedding dresses here cost alot dont they? (I havent asked her) but I bet not all are made here by hand- just adjusted I bet……and they are made in the same place….
Munqe-chickFree MemberLike said previously it’s each to their own, some wouldn’t spent £2000 on an MTB. Hey I think 9k is “cheap” for a wedding, don’t they say the average wedding is 15k!! Craziness!!! But that’s just my opinion!
Find where you want the reception and just say you want a meal for a party will cost half the price .. maybe I’m just a cheap skate 😆skipratFree MemberHora, friend of ours got one off ebay, made to measure in China for £4.99 and about £70 postage. It came all in time, fitted perfectly and looked stunning!!
Our lasses came in about 6 weeks from America……and yes they do cost alot!! (Walks away crying into my rented hanky from my rented suit!!)
DaffyFull MemberI’m not even sure what’s included in the “total cost” of a wedding and as such i have not idea the total cost of mine.
*buries head in sand and hums really loudly*
buzz-lightyearFree MemberWow. I don’t know more than 50 people in total and fewer than half of them I’d invite to my wedding.
Don’t know why you cancelled but it’s not going to be for happy reasons I bet. Good luck.
skipratFree MemberThats it Munque-chick, we got the place we wanted, when we wanted it and at the price we wanted, smiles all round. Our lass had always wanted the hall we’ve booked from being a small girl so is really happy.
Think the average price is £15-20k
konabunnyFree Member“made to measure in China for £4.99”
499? 49.99? surely not 4.99…
skipratFree Member£4.99!!! She was pregnant at the time and was strapped for cash. Sent away here measurements and and got one back that fitted like a glove…even though it was a dress.
She took a bit of a chance but it paid off.
horaFree Member£4.99?! That is cheap. dont stand near any candles or lighters whilst wearing that!!!! 😆
mrsflashFree Memberconvert it’s not necessarily a question of “letting” your parents pay. My dad paid for most of ours, I’m an only child of a single parent – he wanted to pay, he enjoyed paying. I had to rein his spending in!
Feenster, all the best to both of you.
Harry_the_SpiderFull MemberBlimey. £4!
I think i’ll buy one to wear at work for that price.
konabunnyFree Memberjesus x christ. even with the delivery fee bumped up, how can they possibly make a profit on that?
Munqe-chickFree MemberWow that’s impressive £4 for a dress made to fit! Think you may be surprised with the quality as well. I went to Oman and took a really nice work shirt from Bennetton they made me loads exactly the same size at about £2 each now I always get complimentary comments when I wear those shirts!!
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