Number 1 son is 11 years old (12 in a couple of months)

He complains fairly frequently to me that my censorship of video games is out of step with his friends. Basically I allow him to play games up to a rating of 15 (ie age plus 3ish)

This is on the edge of what I feel is appropriate (I play COD etc and understand what the game experience is like, violence levels etc).

However he says “all his friends” are allowed to play 18 games and why can’t he?

I don’t think all his friends parents necessarily know what is in the games their kids are playing.

I am keen to hear of the hive minds’ thoughts on this? What do you do with your kids?

Cheers
Al

I’m probably inline with you

My wife band shooting people games. Aliens are fair game and eventually hacking people with swords was accepted. But I think we stuck to roughly your three year rule. Infact he is 16 and I don’t think owns an 18

In the end all I can say is stick to your guns if you really believe your own rule. If you think he is to young for COD then he is too young. But I’ll admit we met fairly little resistance

We have also stuck to laptop out of bed room when we go to bed

I’m a teacher and tiredness from late night gaming seem quite common

However he says “all his friends” are allowed to play 18 games and why can’t he?

“Because you’re not 18. Now shut up or get back up the chimney.”

However he says “all his friends” are allowed to play 18 games and why can’t he?

“Cos you have better parents than they do.”

In seriousness,

I’m no fan of arbitrary age constraints. Kids mature at different rates and ages (hell, adults do), so there’s not really a one size fits all answer. If it were me, I’d try and vet the content (there must be websites out there which break down game content, even if it’s just for the purposes of Christian outrage) and then make a decision accordingly based on how sensitive a little flower I’d managed to breed.

My kid plays COD. Hey, I’m a bad parent; I like to make him happy.
Doesn’t seem to do him any harm, but I sometimes do wonder (a little)
.
I’ve tried to play it with him and find it absolute rubbish. To be honest, it’s so much like “playing a game” I can’t see that it can be taken as anything else really.

[edit]sorry, forgot to say he’s approaching his 11th b’day

This is a bit of an issue in our house. My lady doesn’t play but is very strict and wont let the kids play anything that’s over their own age. I’ve played games since day dot and would prefer to personally decide if a game is suitable for my children – not some faceless bureaucrat. My youngest is 5 and is allowed to play some 7 games (once i’ve vetted them) and the odd 12 game – portal etc but nothing violent game – just mentally challenging for him. The only exception was Plants v Zombies which is rated 12 and has cartoon violence (if you call flowers spitting peas at zombies violent). His mum found it was 12 rated and banned him from playing it again. THis annoyed both of us as it was a great two player game that taught strategy (and zombie killing 😀 )

My eldest is 11. He can play ’12’ games and has just been allowed (after a lot of persuasion by me on his behalf) to play Halo 4. A lot of his schools friends play COD and have been for a few years. He’s a sensible lad and i’d happily let him play it as i feel he’s ready, but his mum wants him to continue being her wee boy and as he’s happy enough with Halo, i’m not going to press it.

A friend of mine whose lad is the same age as my eldest has been playing COD style games since he was four. He’s now vey good at them 😀

Incidentally, as a tangent,

I predict that this is all going to explode at some point soon with the Xbone / PS4 generation. We’re reaching a point of photo-realistic animation in games, and that’s a whole other ballgame to the cartoon violence of things like the first Mortal Kombat game.

Eg, I watched the trailer for the new Metal Gear outing, and whilst it looks fantastic it’s very realistic and bloody brutal. There were scenes in the trailer that I felt a bit squeamish watching, and I’ve not been 11 for thirty years.

But that’s perhaps a discussion that should have its own thread.

True Cougar. I mean we played GTA on the PS2 and spent most of the time peeing ourselves at the way the character moved. I bet you don’t do that with the newer Xbox games.

Refused to allow sons video games until they were 14 & 12 and even then didn’t allow any shooting or violence etc.

At the time they claimed that I was “ruining their lives”….. Both sons have seperatly thanked me now and feel that that and banning Eastenders were good moves.

Trust me, all other parents allow their kids to:

Stay up later
Watch higher certificate films
Play higher certificate games
Have more pocket money
Get away without doing any chores
Have TV dinners every night

Standard answer = Lucky them, but our house, our rules.

I’m a bad parent; I like to make him happy.

True.

Parenting isn’t about making children happy. Well, good parenting isn’t.

I see your point tucker, but u do believe that they are playing older games.

/makes mental note about chores / money etc/

I tend to follow the age rating tbh as it is there for a reason but would also check myself

If others want to completely ignore the guidance then that is their choice

PS surely this is the kind of thing your kids do anyway behind your back?
I will be disappointed if they dont

I predict that this is all going to explode at some point soon with the Xbone / PS4 generation. We’re reaching a point of photo-realistic animation in games, and that’s a whole other ballgame to the cartoon violence of things like the first Mortal Kombat game.

Eg, I watched the trailer for the new Metal Gear outing, and whilst it looks fantastic it’s very realistic and bloody brutal. There were scenes in the trailer that I felt a bit squeamish watching, and I’ve not been 11 for thirty years.

Nah. We have a proper, EU-wide, legally enforced (in this country at least) age system for buying games in the first place. Those in their 20s, 30s and beyond make up the vast majority of the video game market (by sales at least). The AAA games have budgets bigger than many movies. It’s as laughable a notion that videogames are for kids as the one that bicycles are only for those who haven’t got a driving licence yet.

Adults will continue to make games for other adults (although only about 4% of games actually get an 18 rating). Bad parents will continue to buy and supply unsuitable games for their kids, despite ratings and content info being clearer than ever, and every game system now having very good parental controls. Just like with DVDs, and videos before that. Good parents will inform themselves, set limits and make choices based on the maturity of their children.

fwiw, just as with film I think the implied violence and brutality can often be far more disturbing that that which is directly portayed. It’s usually what you don’t show that makes it worse. Good game designers, like good film directors, can make excellent use of that.

My kids are restricted to the age ratings, unless I have played the game a lot and consider it OK. This rarely happens.

and yes, all my sons friends have played COD etc as well. As said above – my house my rules!

We have a proper, EU-wide, legally enforced (in this country at least) age system for buying games in the first place.

Do we? Since when?

PEGI is European but isn’t a legal requirement, nor is it legally enforced; it’s a voluntary classification system. The closest thing we have is the BBFC, which is legally enforced if titles have adult content (sex / violence / crime, IIRC), but isn’t Europe-wide as far as I’m aware, and doesn’t apply to all titles. Ie, you’ll not see a ‘U’ or ‘PG’ certificate game.

Maybe that will change with games becoming more movie-like. Education will help too; how many parents buy adult computer games for their children because they simply think “games are for kids”? It’s a bit like anime upsetting the notion that cartoons are for kids.

Since July last year, the BBFC don’t do any rating of games (unless it’s pornographic and would need a R18 cert) – it’s all transitioned to PEGI.

Retailers selling 12, 16 or 18 rated games to children under those ages can get £5000 fine and up to 6 years in prison.

Oh yeah.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2012/jul/30/pegi-video-game-ratings-law

Gosh, I didn’t know that. Thanks.

(and, good)

I used to work in Blockbusters as a student, i lost count of the times we got balled out by parents of kids who have just realised what their precious little tot has been playing.
“We should have know that he/she was renting it for them and stopped them”.
Even when we took steps to confirm the age rating of games with parents and would never rent a age restricted title to any one we suspected was under that age this would still happen.
The shit really hit the fan when a game called man hunt came out on the scene, it is an 18 and is graphically violent – so much so some of the hardened gamers amongst the staff did not enjoy it. Every teenage kid wanted it and when the parents saw it they hit the roof.
PEGI may not be a legal requirement but it is the closest thing we have to a guideline so i’d recommend going by that.
PEGI is the current rating system for games and i’d go with that, things have obviously changed for the better.

Wondering if TuckerUk is being judgemental there…

My boy’s friends have the game and he plays it round theirhouse anyway. At least havin bought it I know what he’s playing.
I worry more about adults who spend their spare time ‘gaming’. They’ve got far more problems. Ha.

Parenting isn’t about making children happy. Well, good parenting isn’t.

It is entirely about making children happy. It’s not about giving them everything they ask for though.