Uncle Marvo was widely known as a terrific raconteur, after-dinner speaker and possessor of a Swiftian rapier wit.

He was visiting little Johnny, his nephew to take him to the circus, as Grimaldi the clown was performing.

At the show, Grimaldi came on, had a bit of banter and settled on little Johnny;

“Are you the front end of an ass, young sir?”

“No!” Johnny replied.

“Are you the back end of an ass?”

“No!” Johnny protested, getting flushed.

“Why then, you must be NO END of an ass!” the clown announced to howls of laughter from the audience.

Now, Marvo, although being a fan of harlequins and the clowning profession in entirety, couldn’t stand to see bullying. So, he stood up and immediately the laughter died down being replaced by whispers of recognition, he bowed and addressed Grimaldi thus;

“Why don’t you f#@* off, you red-nosed *%$£”

I couldn’t work out why the football kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

I lay awake all night wondering where the sun had gone. Then it dawned on me.

I once knew an insomniac dyslexic atheist. She’d lie awake all night, wondering if there really was a dog