I ain’t payin free pand a pint fer no norvern piss wot they call beer,fink they want learning proper
Free pahnd? Free fahkin’ pahnd?? Takin the fahkin piss. Ear, tell yer wot; some of this lot, they dunalf talk funny, eh? They wanna learn ‘ah ter talk proper, like wot we does.
They’re ‘avin a bubble, some of this lot.Speshly them norvern mahnkies.
Ear, d’you wanna buy a video recorder? Ah’ve got sum in me vayn. Pukka gear, like. All kosher. Ah’ll even fro in a moat control for it. They’re a monkey dahn Dixons; give us a oner for it. Sorted.
Ah’ve ‘ad ter give this merchant a slap, the ovver day. Comes up ter me, in the boozer, ‘e’s got this dodgy tom ‘e’s tryin ter flog. Ah sed ‘don’t take the piss, son, try to make me look a cahnt in front of me pals’. ‘E’s give it the biggun, so ah’ve ‘ad ter give ‘im a little tickle, in’t I? Slaaag.
Anyway, enuff of this malarky; ah’m of fer a tom t1t. Tell yer what, after that Ruby last night, me khyber’s playin up sumfink rotten…