Toilet etiquette again. Your thoughts….
Unfortunately, where I work, there are no shower / change facilities so it has to be done in the gents.I was part way through my post commute ablutions this morning when a chap from upstairs came in. It was all very pleasant – “good morning”, “did you have a good ride in?” etc. “I must dig” *trap door closes* “my old bike out” *sound of belt buckle and pants dropping “It’s quite old but I think it’ll be” *strain, plop* “okay after a bit of a service and maybe some new brake pads” *succession of wet trumps* “how far do you commute?” ” *balloooosh – sumbarine launched* I’m uncomfortable at this point. *two octaves higher than normal* “it’s just over six miles.” I reply. I gathered my shid and left.
Now I’m a broad minded chap. I like a laugh and a bit of lewd banter like the rest but conversing with a guy who I barely know whilst he’s dans le trap is beyond it for me. How can I chat normally when just a few feet away, seperated by just 20mm of MDF is a guy with his undercarriage over the water, thrutching and gasping to purge his bowels?
Am I being too sensitive here?
Your thoughts, as always, a delight.Posted 5 years agokhaniMember
Many many years ago I worked in a factory where some lads used to do that, except they took a paper and a brew and a bacon butty, and smoked a fag at the same time,Posted 5 years ago
[rustle, parrrrppp, phzzzzzzz,, rustle, chompchompchomp..slurrrrppp, parrrrrrpppphzzzzzzz] 😥
It scarred me for life..ffejSubscriber
What gets me is those who take.. and possibly even make phone calls in the bog.. Whist I’ll admit to the odd game of angry birds whilst enthroned, but my phone is always on silent..
Our students (I work at a Uni) however seem to think nothing of taking a waz one handed whilst gassing away with phone in other hand..
JeffPosted 5 years agoMrOvershootSubscriber
The talking on the phone I find very odd, walked into the staff toilets the other day and our key accounts manager was having a chat with one of his customers at full volume on the phone!Posted 5 years ago
TBH its pretty obvious to the poor sod on the other end as the acoustics in the traps is like an echo chamber at best, not only that the bloke makes some pretty vile noises while in there 😮nealgloverMember
Basically you lost, and he’s now king of the toilets.
You didn’t even know the rules of the game you were playing by the sound of it.
Try again tomorrow !
(My tip, get talking again, and then offer to show him a Photo of a bike you are thinking of buying. If he refuses to open the door to let you show him, you are back in the Game !!)
🙂Posted 5 years agotonydMember
Fair play to the bloke – personally I’m not that comfortable plopping when anyone is in earshot.
Having young children has helped somewhat at home – they’re constantly opening the door and barging in, looking down the pan (between my legs) to see whats going on. Perhaps you should try this at work? That would definitely get you back in the game!Posted 5 years agopeterfileMember
When I was only months into the job, straight out of uni, I was working with a very scary and imposing partner who was about 60.
He was washing is hands in the loo one day when I came in for a wee. As I stood at the urinal, he finished washing his hands and came over and demanded to know what had happened on an earlier telephone call I was on.
I was immediately struck with stage fright and just stood there with member in hand, completely unable to pee.
After about a minute he just blurted out, genuinely confused, “what are you doing???”
“I’m trying to go to the toilet”
“You’re not trying very hard”
then he just turned on his heels and left 🙂Posted 5 years agojoao3v16Member
I’m firmly one of the repressed non-speakers in the toilets. Just feels completely weird to me.
Our office shower & changing room also has a couple of traps.
On many occasions people will come in to use one whilst there are one or two getting changed – you can see the look of panic in their eyes whilst they hurriedly decide whether to proceed with their bowel movements in full ear-shot of people they will sit with in meetings, or do something like grab a tissue and leave to ‘go’ elsewhere.
Most seem to proceed into the trap and then sit in absolute silence, presumably until they think the room is empty.Posted 5 years agoHarry_the_SpiderSubscriber
He was just letting you know what he thinks of you.
Imagine of a silverback gorilla (fig 1.) baring his teeth whilst crapping off the top of the climbing frame in front of a couple of hundred gawping zoo visitors, or Ann Widdecombe (fig 2.) delivering a dressing down to a junior minister whilst perched on the khazi with the trap door open.
You’ve just been owned. With poo.
Posted 5 years ago
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