Tips for getting a newborn to settle at night?

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  • Tips for getting a newborn to settle at night?
  • organic355
    Member

    Our new arrival has been at home for nearly 2 weeks now and we still aren’t getting much sleep, getting him to settle at night is pretty hard, any tips?

    He spends the evenings with us in the lounge in his Moses basket . Fire on, tv noise etc. when we take him upstairs to our room In his basket he kicks off. Our room is a bit cooler and obviously quieter, but don’t want it too hot and can’t leave the radio on all night?

    Sorry wrong forum

    dirtyrider
    Member

    😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆

    Congratulations.

    1. If he/she won’t go down, turn the telly off, put some music on (it’s for you, not them) and pace the floor. It might take time but they love the movement and they’ll go off. One night I got through the whole of Led Zeppelin IV before my youngest dropped off 🙂

    2. <Controversial> If baby wakes up hungry, don’t be too dismissive of just making them up a bottle rather than breast feeding. Bottles are easier for the baby so they’ll be satisfied quicker, plus Dad can do it.

    3. If you have a baby who drops off in the pram, take them out for a walk. If you have a baby who drops off in the car, take them for a drive. Just don’t leave them to sleep in a car seat longer than an hour or so.

    jekkyl
    Member

    .stroke their nose, from the forehead to the tip of the nose, it makes them close their eyes.
    .pick one nice song that you/wife can sing, lullabys are boring so pick a nice one (a pop song) Sing it to them gently and let that be their song throughout their infancy. My wife had great results with Snow Patrol & Chasing Cars. You get the idea.

    Patience and time. Good luck. Don’t be afraid to take them and go and watch tele if you like.

    slimsi
    Member

    Congratulations…

    We are at three months point & had similar issues, are you using a dummy?

    Premier Icon bruneep
    Subscriber

    If he’s clean fed and well, just leave him to cry a bit. remember YOU are in charge not the other way about.
    dont be a helicopter parent

    2. <Controversial> If baby wakes up hungry, don’t be too dismissive of just making them up a bottle rather than breast feeding. Bottles are easier for the baby so they’ll be satisfied quicker, plus Dad can do it.

    <Indeed Controvesial>

    How are bottles easier for babies?

    Mrs b, midwife is shouting at you now 😆

    Premier Icon Pawsy_Bear
    Subscriber

    Routine. You shouldn’t be surprised when you change their environment. Warm cosy with people and noise to cold silent. You go figure.

    Premier Icon Drac
    Subscriber

    Routine.

    Feeds.

    Wind.

    Keep them warm.

    Keep them clean.

    Job done.

    And nothing wrong with bottles as any old fashioned midwife will tell you.

    We always put ours down in the Moses basket in our bedroom at night, I think at about 8pm and she’d sleep for a few hours before her first feed and then it wasn’t always easy to get her to go back to sleep. She’s never been able to sleep except in dark quiet (or white noise / rumble) places. White/pink noise can help them switch off – the outside world is very quiet compared to where they were living for the previous few months. We had to swaddle her from about one month to five months old.

    All a bit of a blur despite being less than a year ago! They’re all individuals though, it’s a case of trial and error and in many cases ignoring advice from those that don’t appreciate how much babies vary in their needs.

    Premier Icon geoffj
    Subscriber

    Routine
    Feed
    Bath
    Put down for the night. Put him in the bed room when you think he should go to sleep – 7 isn? Don’t keep him down with you until you go to bed. A bit of crying/screaming/brining the house down is normal.

    If he’s clean fed and well, just leave him to cry a bit. remember YOU are in charge not the other way about.
    dont be a helicopter parent

    And this ^^^

    Good luck – it does get easier (in 6 week blocks)

    😀

    mrblobby
    Member

    Pretty much what has been said. They’ve just popped out of a warm, dark, and very noisy place with lots of motion. Might be worth trying one of those womb sound recordings. The forehead and nose stroking thing worked here too. Reading to them helped too, just the sound of voices I think.

    Oh and in our limited experience, once you start with bottles it’s difficult to go back, so one worth having a good think over.

    dont be a helicopter parent

    Oh and this too. You are effectively training them and being too attentive doesn’t always help.

    FunkyDunc
    Member

    Cant say being in the lounge is the best place.

    Bedtime is in a bedroom, not in a lounge with lights and tv. They have obviously already got used to being in the lounge. Just stay with them in bedroom until asleep.

    Bedroom, dark, sing, sssh noises, music for as long as it takes. IMO put hard ground work in now and it will get very slightly easier later.

    Don’t expect proper sleep yourself for years! To be honest the first few weeks are all a blur for me now, but I think for the first few weeks your lucky to get than more than 4hrs kip at a time..

    Premier Icon boxelder
    Subscriber

    Try ‘swaddling’ if you haven’t already – wrapping him up quite snugly in a blanket so his arms don’t flail about. In a few more weeks you could go for the letting him cry for progressively longer periods.
    But, he’s a baby and wants company. Give him lots of comfort now and he’ll be more likely to develop into a secure, healthy, happy child – then you can look back smugly and post rows of smilies when folk ask in future. 😉
    We have three and the youngest (4yrs) still ends up in bed with us a few times a week – which is actually quite nice and she’s as happy as that bloke Larry.

    mashiehood
    Member

    We had a double bed in our little mans room, unfortunately it gets uses a lot even after 16 months. There are no right or wrongs, you will shortly work it out.

    A bit too early for routine at this stage.

    Not sure what you’re expecting from your OP? Surely not expecting baby to sleep through at this stage? Baby being breast or bottle fed?

    itsmygame
    Member

    Trust me two weeks in = no routine. Do what needs to be done. They are too young for controlled crying ( and I’m a advocate ). Like said up top take them for a spin in the pram or car ( weather dependant )

    Don’t ever let ANYONE make you feel bad for not breast feeding. There’s nothing wrong with using formula. Statistics can be changed to fit any argument.

    Things will calm down but not for a while. Just hang in there and rest when you can.

    Ps don’t listen to the people who love to say things like ” oh my baby slept all night from birth” or such like.

    Good luck and keep us updated.

    jaymoid
    Member

    We usually use the A65, as he’s a newborn you’ll probably have to drive him, or get the grandparents to do the honours so you can get some sleep. Not sure what he’ll do when he gets there, there’s some lovely countryside and great riding nearby but is probably a bit young even for a balance bike. Good luck and apologies for the crap joke.

    <Indeed Controversial>
    Mrs b, midwife is shouting at you now

    Well it didn’t do my two any harm.

    FunkyDunc
    Member

    Oh take every spare minute you can to sleep whilst baby sleeps

    Tips for getting a newborn to settle at night?

    We usually use the A65, as he’s a newborn you’ll probably have to drive him

    😀

    revs1972
    Member

    This is your first child by the sounds of things.
    In my experience 2 weeks is a short time to expect the baby to settle.
    Yes, you will hear people say that their baby slept through the night from 2 weeks etc, but that is not the norm.
    After my wife had post natal depression with our first ( partly because we spent 7 weeks in hospital with him due to being premature / medical problems) , I decided to take over night feeds with the second., as I could see her getting depressed . I was lucky to get an hours kip between feeds, and believe me , it’s not just the mother who can get baby blues. Lack of sleep does some real weird things to you. ( wife not able to breast feed so was easier for me to help)
    Don’t try to fight it, catchup tv is your friend.
    Don’t leave them to cry. They use crying to tell you something is not right. Controlled crying is not suitable for a 2 week old baby. Raises level of cortisone etc blah blah blah.
    Just try to enjoy your baby and where possible share what ever you can, and let the other half get sleep when they can, and you get the rest when you can. Talk to each other, don’t bottle stuff up. It does get better, and your perseverance now will pay dividends in the end.
    Google stuff like mums net to get advice. Some of it sound a bit far fetched and there is some serious bitching on there, but mostly good helpful info.
    Our six month old started sleeping through at about 5 weeks and that was from 8pm to 6am so was very pleased about that. He is a bugger during the day though and if he goes down for more than 30 mins it’s a bonus so you can’t win them all.
    Sounds a bit ott but we use a monitor with sensor pad ( used it with our first because of his issues) . This gives me peace of mind for his safety and makes me relax. Room temp should be 16-20 degrees ideally.
    Cheers

    Premier Icon Pridds
    Subscriber

    White noise has helped ours

    White noise app had limited success for us, ie, it worked for a couple of nights! We tried most of the above suggestions but seem to have bred an easily disturbed little creature. He has gradually got better though and seems to be getting the hang of it now – we enjoyed a rare full nights sleep last night……he’s 8.5 months btw 😉

    FFJA
    Member

    OP, I feel your pain, mini-FFJA is 4 weeks old today and has same thing with becoming unsettled when we decamp upstairs to bed…
    +1 for strokes and head, gentle voice etc, midwife suggested that because our room is a bit cooler than living room (freezing old house with no central heating) to try popping a hot water bottle into basket to warm it before putting baby in. Obv take it out before you put them in!

    Also, bottles and formula are life savers, don’t let folk tell you otherwise! Mrs FFJA struggled boob feeding and was in agony, (baby a bit tongue tied), formula saved her sanity!
    All the best

    Premier Icon bearnecessities
    Subscriber

    What a lovely thread. (possibly not for the OP!)

    fasthaggis
    Member

    Get yourself across to Mumsnet,they have all the answers* 😉

    It’s your first and it’s hard not to be OTT ( I know we were ),but there is some good advice above. Just hang in there and things will sort themselves out. We had a nightmare with our first,but you could send a rocket through his room now and he wouldn’t wake up.
    It will all balance out 🙂

    * only joking

    Premier Icon kimbers
    Subscriber

    just try and stick to your routine, it does get easier!

    I used to use jekkls stroking forhead thing

    also had a little sleep hat that i rolled down over kimbers jrs eyes, seemed to work!

    FunkyDunc
    Member

    Not sure why people are going on about bottle feeding when the OP hasn’t mentioned it, but in case I am missing some thing, you can get breast pumps which allow you to easily bottle feed breast milk.

    Premier Icon ratherbeintobago
    Subscriber

    And just when you think you’ve cracked it, they start teething…

    Ewan The Dream Sheep!! 😀

    Premier Icon jam bo
    Subscriber

    Ewan The Dream Sheep!!

    + a lot

    Ewan had open belly surgery this week 🙁

    dd looked on with much concern as we delicately removed Ewan’s heart and injected him with new energy.

    He came through and is singing loud and proud again. 😀

    Premier Icon jam bo
    Subscriber

    Did he get so low on energy he went a little mental?

    He just lost all enthusiasm for the job. Bit sluggish. He’d lost his normal glow. Totally off key with his little tune. 🙂

    Premier Icon jam bo
    Subscriber

    Ours got a little bipolar…

    organic355
    Member

    Thanks for all the tips, keep em coming.

    We are persevering with breast feeding for as long as we can, and advised not to try and express any yet as it will effect the milk production. Maybe in a week or 2 then I can help out with the feeds with expressed milk.

    crankboy
    Member

    I can’t honestly remember now it is 36 months since crankbrat was born. Putting to sleep in the room he would spend the night in was one tip. Not setting a routine you did not want for a year an other, my mother warned me off nocturnal drives through gritted teeth having had to do it every night for 18 months with
    me.

    Fed clean and a routine are key. Breast fed boys are the worst sleepers which was our bundle of joy. I do recall posting on here about what a good sleeper he was it was a phase!

    From what you say it is the change of room when you
    go to bed so try putting him down upstairs. Any change to routine takes three nights to settle in so don’t dispaire if it is not an instant Success.

    To the wife of the op – I would advise against swapping a night feed for bottle feed whilst you are trying to establish breast feeding. Not only does it add to the general stress of the early weeks of feeding but its an absolute nightmare when you wake up full of milk with no hungry baby to feed – sometimes breast pads just dont do enough!

    Im not a mid wife but have breast fed for nearly 8 years of my life (not just the one baby!), even on my last child the first 6 weeks were hard work getting feeding established and into a routine – the best advice is roll with the punches and find what works best for your family and more importantly make sure she sleeps when the baby does rather that taking it as an opportunity to clean the house from top to bottom

    wrecker
    Member

    Subscribed. Wreckerjnr arrived at 1600hrs today. 9lbs4!!!!!!!

    Premier Icon MrOvershoot
    Subscriber

    wrecker – Member

    Subscribed. Wreckerjnr arrived at 1600hrs today. 9lbs4!!!!!!!

    Bonny baby 😉

    Good luck, your first?

    lister
    Member

    Feed on demand with boobs. Deal with the fatigue. You’ll all sleep sometime, it’s fine. Weird but fine. You just cope.
    2 week old babies have no routine. They just need when they need. You won’t even have a clue what it is they need for several more weeks at the very least.
    All you can do is work through it each time they cry: nappy, feeding, wind, cuddle, hopefully sleep then repeat 🙂

    But don’t listen to me, my 7 year old still doesn’t sleep through! (5 year old does though)

    Crazy times, and you’ll forget and do it all again in a couple of years…then you can be smug on the internet to others.

    But please stick with the boobs, don’t listen to the bottle/formula nazis 😉

    wrecker
    Member

    Yarp. Handsome chap too, if I do say so myself.

    I have nothing constructive to add but wanted to wish you luck. I read the thread with interest because Mrs Spacecadett is expecting our 1st in Feb.

    swaddling helped our twins relax and feel calm. tried white noise but didnt really work.
    they were both on formula as neither would breast feed, we just had to adapt to their needs.
    Now, at 13mths, they sleep really well. I think from 5mths they went down for 11hrs without interruption.
    Both of them will probably make up for it in later life and go on to be right pains.

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