Why oh why do they insist on making such god awful bikes, ive seen BMW, Porsche, Jeep, land rover and now i have found my favorite car brand has also been sullied by these abominations.

I give you Alfa romeo:
http://www.bellatisport.com/shop/brand/96/Alfa_Romeo.html

Has anyone (bar maclaren) made anything resonable?

Or just post your finds of the worst offenders!

Wow. Extra ugly points for the rear brake cable routing, and v-mounts on the fork.

Interesting frame design – is the head tube meant to pop off in an impact, like a crumple zone or something?

Car companies don’t make bikes to sell. They don’t care if no-one buys them (and if some uber-fans do, they’re quids in) – they do it as a PR stunt to show how cool and environmentally friendly they are.

What were they thinking!

Oh dear, Alfa. What have you done. Carbon frame and XT cranks with Tora forks and cheap looking finishing kit. Why? Who for?

Yours,
Rickos – ex-Alfa owner

On a less posher level, I remember Daewoo used to make bikes in the mid/late 90’s.

I’ve also seen a few Landrover bikes too – they don’t look off road worthy though. 😆

Deore XT cranks and Tora forks?

Still, at least the pedals are good.

I’ve still got two Daewoo Shuttle folders in the attic – a single speed and a three-speed. Really want an alu one, but they’re impossible to find. That’s a bit different, though – Daewoo make everything, from ships to cars to dishwashers.

i just choked on my squash when i saw that alfa bike 😯

They all seem to have one thing in common. They all seem to want to ignore what everyone else has settled on as working lines for a bike and do something ‘different’. Why!

They all seem to have one thing in common. They all seem to want to ignore what everyone else has settled on as working lines for a bike and do something ‘different’. Why!

Because they’re radical, innovative, overpaid car designers who obviously must be better at designing stuff than someone who just designs push bikes for a living.

A few years back, Telewest (for a bit of PR) wanted to have a go at the HPV land speed record attempt, which is held every year at Battle Mountain, Arizona. They hired a bunch of F1 engineers, who obviously know lots more than a bike designer about designing fast bikes, and spent over quarter of a million quid on their machine, and took it to Arizona confident of winning the record.

A bunch of blokes from Canada, who turned up with a machine on the back of a pickup, wiped the floor with them. They got beaten by the women’s team too…

Daewoo make everything, from ships to cars to dishwashers.

+1 daewoo aren’t a car company, they are a big manufacturing company who happen to make cars aswell.

Honda made a decent bike I seem to remember, but yeah most of them are fugly and not even function over form, just different for the sake of it. Who knows, maybe their motorist target audience quite like the looks of them.

That Msport one reminds me of paperclip bike.

That Alfa in base spec with Deore and V brakes is £2,410!

If you buy that you are a dick. Fact.

The BMW bike is classic

Take something designed for off-road use then ruin its off-road capabilities by fitting it with stupid wheels and tyres and longer gearing.

Remind anyone of any other BMW products

Just noticed the name, the Alfa Cross, yeah I would be too, but not half as cross as if someone had bought me the stradale

one or two got it right,

I used to love the fact that some Cannondales bore the Volvo logo for a while. Presumably because of team sponsorship. I know it’s not the same thing, but I like Volvo and would probably buy anything with their name on it.

here’s another bmw 🙂

Who’s the other one simonm? you’re not talking about the hummer are you?
🙂

The Stradale

Got its infulence form this beauty.

But is 14 times more expensive.

STWs favourite hate car brand in 2003:

New Audi Bikes: High-tech bikes, Design Courtesy of Audi

Active people set their sights high. It is therefore only logical that quattro GmbH should likewise provide exclusive forms of mobility on two wheels: With the second generation of the successful Audi bikes, quattro GmbH has come up with something special for riders who are experienced in heading off the beaten track and leisure cyclists.

These bikes reflect the same expertise that is behind the cars produced by AUDI AG: sportiness, original design, innovative technology and top quality standards for materials and manufacturing.

The stars in the premium Audi bike range for 2003 are the Audi Cross Pro and Audi Cross mountain bikes. These take over from their predecessors of the same name and feature innovations in the areas of frame construction, gear and brake components that have been developed over the past two years.

Audi Design was responsible for designing these bikes. quattro GmbH worked together with the Audi Aluminium Centre in Neckarsulm on their development and realisation.

The frame and seat tower, for example, are innovative, unique in-house developments. The partner company Centurion Renner KG is responsible for producing the bikes and for providing competent service.

Both Audi bikes have suspension and dampers for both the front and rear wheel. This assures outstanding ride comfort. Whereas hydraulic elements take care of the damping, the suspension is either pneumatic or uses steel springs. In technical terms, the system is approximately similar to the revolutionary running gear of the allroad quattro, it improves adjustability and reduces weight by around 300 grams.

The hydraulic front and rear damping is also adjustable. Damping response can be adjusted at a separate valve, from sensitive to sporty/stiff, and thus adapted to individual needs. As a special feature, the spring travel of the Manitou Black Elite suspension fork used on the Cross Pro can be adjusted from 80 to 100 mm.

The Audi Cross and Cross Pro mountain bikes have hydraulic disc brakes with perforated discs. These provide excellent braking power from only slight operating pressure, and ensure outstanding braking performance in wet conditions. The drive and shifting components for both wheels are from the XT and Deore top series of the Japanese market leader Shimano.

The Audi Cross Pro, which weighs just 11.9 kilograms, can be fitted as an option with Mavic Crossmax SL wheels. These have 24 lightweight aluminium aero spokes and CNC-machined rims and hubs for further weight optimisation.

The Audi bikes are available in three frame heights: 46, 50 and 54 centimetres.

Or

They all look like lates ’90s petrol station specials.

“55 litres of unleaded, a bag of charcoal, a KitKat Chunkie and er… a bike please.”

Anyone remember the Aston Martin bike from the early 90’s? Essentially a Roberts DOGSBOLX with a similarly sprayed Manitou 3 and XTR IIRC. Dream bike at the time…..and actually a good bike

Oh yeah didn’t lotus do a track bike for Chris Boardman

Harry I think alfa nicked the stradale design from the Btwin hybrid bike

aston martin are also branching out into guitars/amps http://www.astonmartinguitars.com/amps.php you don’t want to know the prices 😯

Not a car brand*, but KTM apparently make decent bikes- never seen one though:
KTM bikes

*Although they do make these!
X-Bow

The Lotus track bike was actually designed by Mike Burrows, a proper bike designer 🙂

+1 daewoo aren’t a car company

That may be the case, but they went on the market when the cars were being widely promoted in this country, so the association was there.

No one thought, “Daewoo, ah, the company that makes many things, including dishwashers and other stuff”, did they? Well, they might have done. 😉 They were sold on the back of the car brand because, well, cars and bikes are ‘cool’.

Edit: geordiemick00 – Why have you posted a picture of a carbon On One?

never seen the bikes but daewoo cars are “cool”? You sure about that?

😉

never seen the bikes but daewoo cars are “cool”? You sure about that?

They might be to some people. 😆

are peugeot a bike company who makes cars or a car company who makes bikes?

Boardman Lotus:

I just love the “wrong headedness” of some of the designs.

That Audi one is a perfect example.
They have no doubt spent a small fortune on design but cleary never actually bother to speak to anyone that rides a mountain bike.

Hence a top tube that looks like it would slice you in half, a rear shock that will be destroyed by the seat tube if it gets anywhere close to full travel and sticking the grippy / chunky tyre on the back.

Was there not a “car-bike” recently that had all its publicity shots with the fork on backwards?

EDIT: And worse crime of all they take a picture of it with the chain in the granny ring – the shame!

Peugeot used to make bikes – this frame in the 80’s was cutting edge (it was a rebadged Roberts)

From this great article: http://www.retrobike.co.uk/?p=1635

My first mountain bike was a Peugeot. It was fluorescent orange…

they still make (badge) them

In technical terms, the system is approximately similar to the revolutionary running gear of the allroad quattro

Well, it has wheels that go round, but that’s about it