I’ll justify ullock.
Skiddaw is always grey. Even the week before last, when the lakes was basked in beating sunshine and it was 33 degrees in keswick, the summit of Skiddaw was grey and misty. You push up (unless you’re on an e-motorbike), get to the top, and the sweat quickly becomes icy. And you can’t see bugger all.
You pick out the start of a ‘footpath’ descending westish which makes sense. It’s got a little bit of a sense of descending into pea soup, but it gets steeper, then steeper, and looser and looser. Within about a minute you’re basically skiing down the hill (lock your wheels all you try, you aren’t stopping). It’s constant edgy balance and almost crashing praying that you don’t tear both sidewalls.
And suddently the gloom opens up and you’re in blazing sunlight, on what feels like a knife-edge ridge that goes on forever – you could be in the alps. You can let the bike go, your arse unpucker and the view is amazing: you have derwent water on your left, bassenthwaite in front of you and you can see all the way to the coast. And now you just follow this ridge, without deviation, on perfect flowing (and occasionally surprisingly technical) singletrack all the way to the valley floor – and it never gets worse. It feels like the descent that top chief tried to reproduce.
Pretty sure it’s the longest constant singletrack descent in england as well – correct me if I’m wrong? There’s plenty harder in the lakes – but they have a tendancy to ride slowly and force you to pick your way down delicately; ullock is good because it is technical enough to be interesting, but flows well enough that you can let the brakes go and properly hoon down.