Copied from Swinley FB Page

People quick heads up, Did an early ish one today over on the Crowethone/Caesars camp side, heading back to the car Park at the Hub and encountered another rider on a Nomad, having an issue with three wanna be mid to late teens “Road men”. One on a massive grey Carrara, his mate on a red and black Phaze and one vertically challenged little sod on foot. It appears they were trying to take his bike, but all denied it when I asked what the problem was. Apparently they stopped th<span class=”text_exposed_show”>e lad to ask where they were then tried to block the path front and back with the one on foot trying to get the lad off the Nomad. When I arrived behind them they became aggressive /defensive swore a lot called us both “Gay C**ts” and made off back towards 9 mile ride towards Crowthorne. People please if you are on your own be careful and stop for no one unless you think your safe to do so.
Schools and Colleges are on summer break and less honest young people would love a decent bike to swap out for money at Crack converters or to their mates for a hundred quid.</span>
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PS what kid wears a black puffa jacket in 30 degree heat? <span class=”_5afx”><span class=”_58cl _5afz” aria-label=”hashtag”>#</span><span class=”_58cm”>smellyndumb</span></span>

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I got used to this crap when riding BMX as a teen, if you cant escape on the bike and you really want to keep it – best thing to do is pick up your bike using it as a shield and start smacking people with it. No questions asked and no posturing or hesitation.

What are “road men”? Were they wearing steelie boots and fluorescent jackets?

Southern London thing, not quite chavs. Young men whos lives revolve around their shitty cars and use the word “Bruv” a lot.

Would they be people also commonly known as a brand of suspension fork ?

What are “road men”?

What is Google..?

Would they be people also commonly known as a brand of suspension fork ?

Manitou?  No, apparently there were 3 of them.

IGMC

Slightly less of a heads up for locals;

The path along nine mile ride is getting a bit overgrown and narrow in places. I almost had a head on with another commuter yesterday on a narrow corner, I ended up OTB in the hedge on one side, she somehow stayed almost upright but dropped her bike. Lots of apologies all around, I was going down the hill too quick and neither of us stopped in the distance we could see!  But no harm done other than a palm full of bramble thorns for me.

It’s not part of the trail center despite it’s drifty, loamy swoopiness in places!

Would they be people also commonly known as a brand of suspension fork ?

Struggling with that…?

Foxes?

What are “road men”?

What is Google..?

Must be a Berkshire ‘ting ‘cos I live in ‘ampshire blood, an we ‘av nuffink like ’em in ‘ere 😉

It’s not part of the trail center despite it’s drifty, loamy swoopiness in places!

Ooo, you’ll be due a letter from CE then 😉 😛

Ooo, you’ll be due a letter from CE then

Am I missing something? I meant the cyclepath that runs down the back of Great Hollands, not the cheeky stuff in Crowthorne.

Ah, probably okay then. So long as it’s only green, blue & red or fireroads when inside Swinley 😀 (Crowthorne, don’t know, but CE own it now apparently).

Struggling with that…?

Pike(y), I’m guessing.

Pike(y), I’m guessing

But Pike is a model not a make!

Pike(y), I’m guessing

But Pike is a model not a make!

Are you having a Lauf?

Ah, probably okay then. So long as it’s only green, blue & red or fireroads when inside Swinley  (Crowthorne, don’t know, but CE own it now apparently)

Since when has Crowthorne been part of the CE? I’ll be pissed if it is, their remit is supposed to be to manage land that used to belong to the crown, not start buying up more!

swore a lot called us both “Gay C**ts”

I hate this kind of language. someone said that to me the other day – i couldn’t believe it, nearly choked on his cock!

With the cost of mountain bikes seemingly only going up I guess they make a pretty easy target, a tired biker might not be able to put up much of a fight.

Good on the chap for stopping to help.

Since when has Crowthorne been part of the CE? I’ll be pissed if it is, their remit is supposed to be to manage land that used to belong to the crown, not start buying up more!

I’ve not seen anything official about it but a number of people have mentioned it now, and I did wonder why CE ranger van was patrolling around by Corkscrew.

And yeah, likewise not happy. CE bow down to NE. The FC are far more tolerant to bikes and take an approach of removing anything a bit OTT or where they have to for safety, but are happy to keep things as they are otherwise. The logging also seems to be plain commercial rather than to satisfy NE and Thames Basin Heaths desire to create massive protected heathlands in the South East.

Maybe I’m missing something, but wouldn’t a gay c##t technically be a lesbian? Which makes me think that the road men have got it all wrong..

Advice ‘re lift bike and use it as a weapon is sound. I’ve tried it once and the other guy hadn’t factored the sudden impact of 14 kilos of metal landing on his head into his equations. He went a over t and I was able to retrieve the bike off of his prone (& groaning form) and head off into the distance. He was fine (I think) but I felt no remorse, he knew the game he was playing..

Goes off to Google vids of people being hit with bikes.

I reckon bear spray’s the answer

I reckon bear spray’s the answer

To fight off any gay slurs?

They were probably preying on the poor guy after he’d nearly died of boredom from riding round Swinley 😉

Cheezpleez
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I reckon bear spray’s the answer

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Roadman speak?

You know guys,

The important thing is not how the Gays are portrayed, nor is it whether Pikes are a make of fork, nor indeed whether a particular trail is or isn’t Swinley or belongs to QE or not…

The important thing here is that something bad almost happened and cyclists need to look out..

You really are an argumentative bunch of muppets at times on here.

Weeksy’s missus said no this morning….

PS what kid wears a black puffa jacket in 30 degree heat?

Ma’s not hot.

I don’t condone this behaviour but riding a Nomad around Swinley? Maybe they were trying to do the guy a favour an swap for one of their more appropriate hardtails.

You know guys,

The important thing is not how the Gays are portrayed, nor is it whether Pikes are a make of fork, nor indeed whether a particular trail is or isn’t Swinley or belongs to QE or not…

The important thing here is that something bad almost happened and cyclists need to look out..

You really are an argumentative bunch of muppets at times on here.

Cmon, you’ve been on here long enough not to expect people to take things seriously, or not behave like dicks…..

I always thought “Road Men’ was a pre war cycling term for people who did a lot of miles but didn’t race.

what kid wears a black puffa jacket in 30 degree heat?

Peter Beardsley. It’s ideal for keeping a lovely lumpy chicken wrap in.

a tired biker might not be able to put up much of a fight.

TBH, anyone who hasn’t been taught how to fight isn’t going to put up much of a fight, especially 3 against 1.

I reckon bear spray’s the answer

Going by the description I’d say twink spray would have been more effective.

Cmon, you’ve been on here long enough not to expect people to take things seriously, or not behave like dicks…..

For those of us that ride with our kids this is worrying…

TBH, anyone who hasn’t been taught how to fight isn’t going to put up much of a fight, especially 3 against 1.

You only need to hurt them enough it’s not worth it….but that completely changes if you are with kids/family.

You only need to hurt them enough it’s not worth it

Actually, I think of it as the opposite, you only need to convince them that they will have to hurt you enough that the prison time isn’t worth it. The constabulary are probably too busy to put much effort into investigating things if some teenagers grab a bike and hoof it without actual assault. However, if you force them to put you in hospital, then it will be investigated and it’s a bit harder to brush off as some harmless prank that got out of hand. Question is, are you willing to risk hospital?