Stuff that makes you disproportionately cross

Apart from “Good job it was a quiet day at Southwaite Services” I can’t think of anything not rude to say about this

Apart from “Good job it was a quiet day at Southwaite Services” I can’t think of anything not rude to say about this

Even as someone who follows “Shite Parking Watch UK” on FB, that is special!

“The Bike Farmer” on YouTube. I can’t be arsed to write down all the things I find really irritating about him. Have a look at some of his videos and tell me I’m wrong!

Sounds like he’s tried to turn the audio into coal. Awful.

Cougar2Free Member
Oh, trip is there. I know how many miles I’ve done since I last (ahem) tripped over the reset control by accident, but not total mileage.

For sure both Trip and Odometer are there, they just changed the names to Total distance and Long term distance, as far as I can tell.

I’m less annoyed about it now, however the heater and volume controls are craptastic.

FedEx’s new billing website.

People who come to work on site without even their own frikkin pencil ffs, then leave offcuts on the saw every single time they use it and put gripfill covered things and all sorts of crap on every single horizontal surface that you’ve set up as a workstation and sling their car in the middle of the large drive, blocking it without a thought to all the other people that need to fit in and constantly drop their guts in the room you’re working in.

Aaaaaaaaaaagggggggghhhhhhhhh!

I’m ok. I’ve just executed him with the pencil I lent him.

Help desk that contacts me during my night so that they can put the “wait time” on me. When they finally contact me, they haven’t read the case notes, do all the same things as every previous person than say they will escalate within the team. Rinse and repeat every day for 3 weeks.

If only I had an admin user id! All that needs to be done it to uninstall VBA completely and reinstall from scratch. (not my choice to use VBA, I use a terminal emulator that relies on it) (and the terminal emulator is rubbish but we’re not allowed to use the good one that we used to have from a German vendor because having fewer but worse emulators is better)

Apart from “Good job it was a quiet day at Southwaite Services” I can’t think of anything not rude to say about this

To be fair, it looks like it was a quiet day. If the car park was near capacity I’d have more sympathies.

the terminal emulator is rubbish but we’re not allowed to use the good one

How locked down is the PC? Stick PuTTY on a pendrive?

Stick PuTTY on a pendrive?

My toddler did that once. I wouldn’t recommend it.

(Yes, I know what you really mean 😉 )

PuTTY doesn’t support 6530 block mode so not an option sadly

I have no idea what that is, but PuTTY’s author is a friend of mine so I could always ask.

‘Do you want anything from the shop’

Does not mean I’ll do your weekly shop or hunt out specific brands of thing, especially tobacco products,

6530 block mode is the protocol invented by Tandem Computers for their bespoke slightly intelligent terninals back in the day – so logically like IBM 3270 but completely different. It’s only used by HPE NonStop (the current name for Tandem) so probably not worth developing support for but thanks for the thought Cougar.

The word ‘Schedule’

It’s pronounced  SHED U AL  not;  SKED U AL

It causes me to shout at the telly or radio.

It causes me to shout at the telly or radio

As in Rad-e-oh, not Ray-de-oh?

Fireworks. Currently dog2 is enjoying a valium and hiding under the sofa. 1 night is a pita but a couple of weeks is hateful.

American voters.

Oh, and those who’ve had enough of experts.

Elections…  Start off with a mild worry, then get hopeful only to be royally pissed off when the results roll in.  The UK GE this summer less so but I’d like a feeling of joy on the day after an election at some point…

Broadband/media provider companies…

Convo something like this via webchat:
Here’s the best deal we can get you. Now, it’s what you have said you need and more than what you have at the moment, and £105 p/m.

OK – let’s look at the detail…oh, so it’s the same as I have now?
Yes

But its £35 a month more?
Yes

And I can renew online for only an extra £2 a month?
Yes

Have I misinterpreted something here?
I don’t know what this means.

I’ll leave it thanks.
Hello, can you clarify how you wish to proceed?

I’ll leave it thanks, as I’m not ineterested.
Oh, ok, can you fill out this survey?

FML

Cookery programmes – when did they all start saying tewmrick instead of turmeric?

Makes me tut quietly every time.

And why do chefs always put a redundant “off” after words? Fry off, seal off, roast off etc.

I’ve never listened to GB News before. This morning someone had it on in the background so I was idly listening.

…..

Can’t even formulate a sentence properly about it. Let’s just say it explains a lot.

The world’s really going down the drain, isn’t it.

And why do chefs always put a redundant “off” after words? Fry off, seal off, roast off etc.

“Fry off” at least makes a nominal degree of sense. If you fry something, you cook it with oil. If you fry off something it implies some sort of reduction. Maybe.

A few tractor drivers. I know you’re in a hurry but driving at 20+mph around a blind corner on a single track road isn’t on. And whilst you’re very skilled I’m sure the giant trailer really needs more than 20cm clearance from the cyclist who’s now in a hedge.

Grumpy people on site, all I asked for was a pencil…

I even got some parking practice in at Southwaite Services because he’d grumped at me about that

People pronouncing ‘Schedule’ SHED U AL; it’s SHED YOOL 🙂

Elections… Start off with a mild worry, then get hopeful only to be royally pissed off when the results roll in. The UK GE this summer less so but I’d like a feeling of joy on the day after an election at some point…

I’ve got some great news for people like you living in the US. You won’t have to worry about elections ever again.

After recent events I’d have to say Americans.

When Strava doesn’t record a ride. I had it started on both my phone and Samsung smartwatch. The watch ran out of battery (it’s old) and the app didn’t save on the phone.

A few tractor drivers.

People following tractors.

Behind a tractor, you’ll have a line of traffic half a mile long dribbling along at 10mph. Yet behind a bicycle they’ll cheerfully fling themselves into oncoming traffic with nary a care in the world. And gods help you if you’re next-but-one behind a tractor, not only will the driver in front not consider an overtake until the heat death of the universe but if you think “I can pass both of these” then they’ll actively pull across to obstruct you for queue-jumping. ¬!”£$%^&*(ards.

The bloke who nicked cutlery from Pedalabikeaway at FOD on the weekend because he didn’t bring any in his van. Don’t be a ****

When Strava doesn’t record a ride

What ride?

When “Pie” turns out to mean soup with a pastry lid.

Bake, or rather bakes, used as a noun

E.g. Bob bakes (correct) some delicious bakes (get f*cked)

I feel quite strongly about this. Who’s with me…

Auto correct on messaging apps/keyboards. If I wanted to type ‘hit’ I would have typed ‘hit’…what I actually typed was ‘got’ because I wanted to use the word ‘got’.

Edit: I’m aware I can turn this off, but that means navigating through 6 screens to get to the deactivate button. Having a bad day 🙁

my newish phone,  when i want to download photos to the computer by USB, it says to tap the notification saying your phone is being charged by USB. But now that its 100% full, theres nowhere to tap/connect

More cars in front of you, that slow down when the lights are green, so theyre the only ones that can get through

chicken pies, they all have bacon in them, i dont eat red meat, I need chicken pies with real chickens

Bake, or rather bakes, used as a noun

You can blame the likes of Greggs for that… it’s not a ‘steak bake’ it’s a meat pasty FFS.

The horrible whiny space ship noise of a neighbour’s Tesla numerous times a day  – her Green credentials would be a lot greater if she got off her ample backside and did trips to the local shops and the school run on foot and not by lining that right wing cretin Elon Musk’s pockets

Cookery programmes – when did they all start saying tewmrick instead of turmeric?

Jamie Oliver. Just shut up. Just shut your freekin mouth. Please.

People on eg Facebook who assume that everyone is in the US. “Where’s the best place to buy x?”  Well, I dunno, there’s a little shop down a back street in Ulam Bator. How dis that work for you?

American voters

Well, it makes sense they voted to not have abortions, cos they also voted to not have health insurance. So at least they’re consistent.