Stress, does it all get too much for you sometimes?

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  • Stress, does it all get too much for you sometimes?
  • si-wilson
    Member

    Now I’m not normally the type of bloke to post this sort of stuff to strangers, but recently the shit is getting me down.

    The smallest things are stressing/worrying me to the point of madness, and dare i say it depression. I’m normally pretty much on the edge, it comes with the jobs i do i suppose but its worse at the moment than ever.

    I know what some of the issues/reasons are, but I can’t do much about them as they are mostly out of my control.

    I have not ridden my bike in an age, which doesnt help. I don’t walk the dogs far, which normally helps too.

    I Don’t want to sound whingy, i just needed to get it off my chest ๐Ÿ™

    flow
    Member

    Stress can cause serious health problems and shouldn’t be taken lightly (seriously!) Make some time for yourself, do something enjoyable at least once a week, ride your bike, walk the dog etc.

    Also don’t take things to seriously, stress is only stressful if you perceive it that way.

    Munqe-chick
    Member

    The answer to your question is no! But I think you already know the answer to half your questions by the look of the thread!

    qwerty
    Member

    Acknowledge it.

    Find your triggers.

    Find a coping mechanism.

    Attempt to deescalate your triggers.

    Do not allow it to lessen you from the person that you are.

    (so much easier to sort a strangers shit out via my mobile than it is to start dealing with mine)

    TandemJeremy
    Member

    Sensible stuff from qwerty

    Make time for you. Ride your bike. Just do it.

    don’t be afraid to get pro help- i am a big fan of counselling – for this sort of issue usually not much is needed as its not deep rooted issues more than likely – a sense of perspective and some coping mechanisms are what you need

    Oh – and its always in your control – say no / tell em to farck off / relax / go screw the bank manager ( or whatever you need to do)

    You take control – its your life

    DT78
    Member

    Knowing you are getting stressed is half the battle so you can take some positive action. I can spot the signs now when getting seriously stressed with work (not sleeping/shortness of breath/IBS) – I use it as a signal to take a step back, slow down and think about things for a little while.

    I make time to leave work on time, cycle via my local woods and sit on my favourite tree stump and just spend 30mins on my own thinking things through.

    Everytime I see an ambulance pass by or hear tragic news on the radio/tv I use that to get some perspective on my own circumstances. It could be so so much worse.

    Chinup

    Once.

    Don’t worry about things that you have no control over, because you have no control over them. Don’t worry about things that you have control over, because you have control over them.

    Take those dogs out tomorrow, first thing, for as long as you need.

    project
    Member

    Stress gets people in many ways some become workaholics, some get with drawn and agitated, some cope, some dont.

    Find the triggers as somebody above said, and try to fire them, or just redirect them, chat to strnagers about them, it does help,and people do care on here.

    As you say you want to get it off your chest, so do either in public if its not to personal or in private, quite a few of us have emails in our profiles and all have different personalities, that may well be sutable for you.

    TandemJeremy
    Member

    As project says – feel free to email me if I can be of help

    Once again all the petty squabbling gets put aside to help one of our own

    imnotamused
    Member

    Going through a pretty stressful time at work at the moment. My colleague just took time off through stress and got alapecia (spelling?), another is complaining of chest pains, another is loosing weight. Fortunately I have a great wife who is keeping home running while juggling a 9-5 while I concentrate full on at work to try and stabilize things. Stress is not good but although I can’t offer any advice I can say you are not alone.

    Premier Icon ourmaninthenorth
    Subscriber

    I’ve worked and lived through huge stress. It ud not to bother me, but when it did it became inescapable.

    There are many ways to deal with it. Not all wrong, not all right. For me, talking to a (professional) stranger really helped. Not because she gave me some great insight, but because it was the catalyst for my own insight.

    But, you know, start by venting here. It’s remarkably soothing, I find.

    qwerty
    Member

    MTFU

    and you’ll become an onion ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

    flow
    Member

    Once again all the petty squabbling gets put aside to help one of our own

    **** you TJ ๐Ÿ˜‰

    all the petty squabbling gets put aside to help one of our own

    Speak for yourself I just do it to come across all samaritan-like. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    oxnop
    Member

    I’ve felt same over last month due to work. Chest pain, short of breath, extremely irritable with friends/ family and not wanting to exercise.

    I realised I was suffering with stress- which I now know is the first step to dealing with it.

    Forced my self back into the routine of commuting to work, been out on MTB a few times and made sure I took my little man out for longer walks:

    Got through last week without any chest pain.

    I’d say get out with your dog, get on your bike and make sure you have some ‘you’ time.

    Hope it all works out for you though!

    ernie_lynch
    Member

    No, not really. Not these days anyway. Sorry. Maybe it’s ’cause I generally don’t give a monkeys – dunno. Try riding your bike – that should help. Or not giving a monkeys. HTH. Let me know.

    don simon
    Member

    Don’t worry about things that you have no control over, because you have no control over them. Don’t worry about things that you have control over, because you have control over them.

    The smartatian speaketh sense (for once).

    Premier Icon Coyote
    Subscriber

    What qwerty said.

    I often get panic attacks. I seem to run between exhilerating, giddy highs and crushing lows with little middle ground. I have occasionally considered the docs but can’t be bothered.

    However as qwerty details above, I can recognise the symptoms and *usually* deal with them.

    One thing that does help is exercise. Even when you would rather chew through your own wrists rather than do anything, go for a walk. Try a run. It works. Trust me.

    Oh, and as others have said email is always open.

    Premier Icon Wookster
    Subscriber

    Yes mate time out on the bike helps, as does just being left the **** alone at work!

    kaiser
    Member

    I became very ill because of stress and ended up an alcoholic as a result of trying to self medicate for 20 yrs . Cut out the booze 2 yrs ago and practice meditation daily for 20 minutes or more. Hard to discipline yourself at first but don’t underestimate what it can do for you in relation to boosting inner peace and ability to relax. not an overnight fix though but can and does change people’s lives for the better. I was constantly irritable before but now remain fairly stress free regardless of the situation and feel pretty chilled the majority of the time.

    si-wilson
    Member

    Thanks all, I appreciate you taking the time to reply.

    TJ, one day I might actually drop you an email ๐Ÿ™‚

    Premier Icon cardo
    Subscriber

    Feel for you mate… had some very serious stuff to deal with 4 odd years ago , thought it was never going to end… keep riding that bike and walking the dog tho’ best un-stressing medicine you can have…. the other thing i learnt was who my mates were and who I could trust to unload my problems to… it does get better in the end.

    Premier Icon DezB
    Subscriber

    You don’t say why you haven’t been on the bike for a while… Makes a MASSIVE difference to me.
    There was an article in MBR a few months back, by Andy Waterman. I think it was the October issue. Article was about the way mountain biking makes you completely focus your mind. Gets rid of all the crap thougts, even if it is just for a short while. I reckon that is one of the reasons why its such great stress relief; refreshes the brain.
    Found it a very inspiring article (makes a damn change for MBR!!) and I ‘m making sure i get out as much as possible from now on. ( hell of a lot of shit going on at the moment, too).
    Anyway, so if its possible, get out for a serious ride!

    cynic-al
    Member

    pwning folk online is good stress relief. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Being pwned isn’t ๐Ÿ™

    Seriously the advice above sounds good – it seems like you have lost perspective and need to lose yourself in whatever.

    TandemJeremy
    Member

    Si – feel free -or project or anyone else who might help

    Not because she gave me some great insight, but because it was the catalyst for my own insight.

    Thats how much of it is supposed to work – certainly the “person centred approach” which is my fave

    ernie_lynch
    Member

    …..don’t underestimate what it can do for you in relation to boosting inner peace

    This very true, although the way I achieve inner peace is to finish all the things I’ve started. For example, today I looked around to see all the things I started and hadn’t finished… So far I have finished one bottle of vodka, a bottle of red wine, a bottle of Scotch, some Valium, a small box of chocolates and 9 beers. You have no idea how good I feel.

    Premier Icon ononeorange
    Subscriber

    Yes, in increasing frequency. It gets me by total intolerance of people around me followed by increasingly extreme panic attacks. I suspect most people go through the same in some version – as above, we find ways to deal with it. For me – and this may not apply to you – professionals can just stay right away.

    Coyote puts it perfectly – manic, crazy highs and lows which swing around so quickly. That’s the point to try to find a few minutes for a run, anything. Exercise brings it all back from the precipice of extreme violence!

    flow
    Member

    Kaiser, how/what is this meditation you speak of?

    flow
    Member

    This very true – the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you’ve started. For example, today I looked around to see all the things I started and hadn’t finished… So far I have finished one bottle of vodka, a bottle of red wine, a bottle of Scotch, some Valium, a small box of chocolates and 9 beers. You have no idea how good I feel.

    They say that laughter is good medicine.

    You just made me LOL

    project
    Member

    Si if youre not riding your bike can i have it then, cant take the dog it would most probably kill my cat.

    lol.

    Premier Icon cardo
    Subscriber

    Ernie Lynch. funny quote nice one!

    brooess
    Member

    Got to me once – frustration with work.
    Went to the doc, he looked me straight in the eye and said ‘it’s only a job’. Wise words.
    As said above, coming on here to acknowledge is first and most important action to take. And not easy to do…
    Now find a way to deal and ways to reduce it.
    I used therapy – long-needed and hugely beneficial.
    Mountain-biking and the fact it requires 100% attention (unlike road biking, running and loads of other sports) is a great releaser. But IME you need to find what’s causing it and sort that, not just ways to cope.
    Also recommend yoga – great for core strength, great for finding inner calm.
    Drink sensibly if at all, eat well, sleep well, exercise plenty.
    And good luck. This kind of thing tends to happen to the good people.
    IMO there’s a lot of it about at the moment so you’re not alone

    ernie_lynch
    Member

    OK joking apart, TSY’s suggestion is imo by far the best : Don’t worry about things that you have no control over, because you have no control over them. Don’t worry about things that you have control over, because you have control over them.

    Or not giving a monkeys as I like to say. Not easily done when you’re feeling down, I know, but work on it. You can only do, what you can do. And ride your bike. And walk your dog.

    yunki
    Member

    I suffer with stress..

    If I don’t manage it with regular riding (amongst other things) it quickly gets on top.. so I will force myself regardless of whether I want to or not.. it turns out for the best 99.9% of the time anyway..

    get on your bike Simon.. (thanks for the wheels BTW.. they’re ace)

    clunker
    Member

    I know how you feel Si, been suffering myself recently. Lots of good info above.

    kaiser
    Member

    Kaiser, how/what is this meditation you speak of?

    best to wiki the word as it covers many practices but my method ( buddhist “mindfulness of breathing” )simplified, is generally sitting quietly following the flow of my breath (and various aspects of it) whilst trying to observe the coming and going of thoughts through the mind but not getting distracted or too involved with them. the effect with practice is that the incessant chatter in your head starts to quieten down and not bother you too much ..which is great! many other benefits too .
    there’s a saying “you don’t do meditation ..meditation does you ”

    mrmo
    Member

    only time i really got stressed was working for a $hit of a boss, try to tuff it out but in the end i just walked and the relief was immense. I had no job but the stress just evaporated.

    Sometimes you just have to do what you think you should but are afraid to do.

    flow
    Member

    best to wiki the word as it covers many practices but my method ( buddhist “mindfulness of breathing” )simplified, is generally sitting quietly following the flow of my breath (and various aspects of it) whilst trying to observe the coming and going of thoughts through the mind but not getting distracted or too involved with them. the effect with practice is that the incessant chatter in your head starts to quieten down and not bother you too much ..which is great! many other benefits too .

    Nice one, will have a read and try that out mate.

    GJP
    Member

    Chronic stress at work seemed to be the trigger for my Bi-polar disorder, which has pretty much **** up my life for the last 6 years.

    Although I have been pretty good for the last 12 months looking back I have lost 5 years of my life, and I will no doubt need to remain on medication for the rest of my life, or the very least the next 5 years, and the risks of a serious relapse make me think I will choose to stay with the drugs.

    I have no doubt I am an outlier and my body/brain reacted very badly to it, but stress is something to take very seriously

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